Date: October 04 2024 8:11 PM Title: Opening Act
Well that ending tho it’s rare to find someone who knows they have fucked up and can’t fix Thier problems I hope to see these characters in the future maybe with Serena finally learning that you can’t run from what you have done
Date: September 02 2024 6:36 AM Title: Opening Act
>tinies are still considered people with rights.
>half the characters seem happy to casually torture and carelessly engineer the death of them.
Pick one.
Beside that I found the tiny abuse and death scenes pretty inventive. My main problem was the motivation, reasoning and nonsensical actions of the characters. The girl who refused to come to the defence and then aid of her tiny sister drowning in spit. Not to mention Serena being straight up cruel and psychotic, which makes no sense considering you initially wrote her as someone kind and sympathetic to tinies, due to her own sibling shrinking and going missing.
Author's Response:
Very picky I see, I actually really like the input. But this is not a story that is intended to show people who are kind to tinies. Obviously there would be people who are, but that isn’t what I’m covering. They do have rights and are considered human, yes. But like most stories that take place in similar circumstances, that still comes with a lot of people feeling differently.
Also, Serena is not a character I made with the intention of being mentally well. She is written to be very impulsive, delusional and scary when it comes to Bonnie. That is why during Hana’s POV her actions seemingly make no sense, because they shouldn’t make sense to anyone outside of Serena’s mind.
That is where her poor decisions come in, which is a huge factor in what keeps the story moving. That’s why I wrote the saliva scene in the first place, to further show her lack of clear thought, impulsion, and misplaced blame when it comes to Bonnie, rather than just briefly mentioning it. The realization and effects of her impulsion is very much so intended to be touched on in the next chapter when everything is said and done.
I really appreciate you reading and I love the input, no matter the context!
Date: July 25 2024 6:36 AM Title: Opening Act
I really like where this is going. Incredible work
Author's Response:
Happy to hear!!
Date: March 24 2024 11:45 PM Title: Opening Act
Great so far, I'm curious to see if any of the main characters will be shrinking
Author's Response:
Thank you! I’m sure you’ll like where it goes.