Reviews For Pariah
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Reviewer: Jim1989 Signed starstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: July 13 2024 4:50 PM Title: Breakfast (part 2)

Another review for the hell of it...

I'll say this much about Michelle: You can't spell her name without h-e-l-l. She most certainly lives up to things on that end, no doubt.

I honestly ponder as to how much I should pity Nick by this point in the story. To be clear, he did attempt to rape Michelle at the start of it, so in one respect, he had a LOT of this coming to him from a karmic perspective. I'm sure there are those who would say to me that he gets whatever he deserves in this story and are rooting for Michelle wholeheartedly. Personally, a part of me is saying "Alright, that's enough. You've had your fun. Look at him. There's nothing left to kill. You're practically beating a dead horse at this point. Just put a bullet in him already." Again, I've read this story before, so I know how it ends and I'm just ranting and raving in hindsight; just felt the need to put this out there on a whim (I suppose it helps traffic in appeal for this story if nothing else).

And granted, perhaps there is some part of Nick that subconsciously loves and desires to be conquered by Michelle, to shrink all the more and watch her grow larger, more powerful, more sexy, and more dominating in the process. I guess I'm torn by the whole "conscious v. subconscious" conflict raging within Nick at this point in the story. If he doesn't really want this to happen, then I'm inclined to just look at Michelle and say "You evil bitch. You have no idea how bad I wanna kill you. If I could, I'd whip out a hand grenade, pull the pin, release the spoon, and wrap my arms around one of your legs and hold on for dear life as we go out like a twisted version of 'Romeo and Juliet'." I'd figure that if I were in Nick's position that my life would effectively be over and I'd do everything to make sure that I take Michelle to hell with me if nothing else.

Of course, with Michelle essentially inside Nick's head, that sort of thing wouldn't happen, with her acting as the puppet master at this point. Again, I know I'm ranting and raving in hindsight with how the story ends and all; it just left that much of an impression on me to the point that I felt compelled to give a response. I suppose if nothing else it could be taken as a sort of positive consequence in that it garnered enough of a response out of me after reading it, even knowing how it ends at this point in the tale...

Reviewer: Jim1989 Signed starstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: July 11 2024 8:38 PM Title: Breakfast (part 1)

I know I'm late to the party and that this story has been finished for many years now. I just felt like putting this review out there for the hell of it. This particular chapter resonates with me in particular for a plethora of reasons.

First off, the amount of high-end vocabulary Michelle uses when explaining how she solves the Shouryya Ray math problem. I confess that if she were explaining that to me that I would just say "Yeah, you're speaking way above my level on that one, so I'm not gonna even pretend to know what you're talking about." Of course, Nick is too prideful to admit that it all goes over his head (which given his smaller size is rather apt in this case), so he can't bring himself to admit how much dumber he has become by this point. If it were someone a little more humble than Nick, they'd probably admit it to say to Michelle, "Okay, I get it. You're a super genius. Happy now? Feel big and proud and superior?" Again, I get that I'm ranting, but I just felt a whim to post a response for the hell of it.

I'm also conflicted when Michelle decides to comfort Nick in his time of need, much like the earlier chapter when Nick is ridiculed at school and literally trapped in his locker, feeling small symbolically as well as literally. While I can appreciate the sense of comfort Michelle provides him when he's at his lowest, it also makes me wanna vomit a little bit, knowing it's all just an act in the end to bend him to her will. I know that some people are into that sort of thing, but if I were in my right mind, I'd wanna downright castrate myself if I knew I wouldn't bleed to death and break the spell that Michelle would have over me. By this point, she basically controls Nick through his libido, so he's basically a slave to his baser instincts and wrapped around Michelle's finger. Again, I know how this story ends...just felt like ranting for the hell of it.

Having said all that, the writing in this chapter (and the broader story) is very well done. The mind games, the suspense, the growing inner turmoil and humiliation from Nick's perspective...it tends to keep the reader on edge throughout the story. Don't take this review in any negative sense. I'm sure there are others who would say to me, "If you don't like stories with elements of torture, humiliation, slavery, and/or twisted mind games, then maybe you should just avoid reading them altogether, eh?" The one thing I will say that this story - for good or ill (maybe a bit of both) - left an impression on me to this very day, even after all these years later.

Reviewer: anonyguy Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: December 11 2013 5:06 PM Title: The Lab Partner

I hope you get a chance to post the first draft soon.  I'm really looking forward to it. 

Reviewer: jets012345 Signed [Report This]
Date: November 15 2013 7:44 AM Title: The Lab Partner

When do you think you will post the first draft ?



Author's Response:

I'm really busy at the moment, but probably fairly soon.

Reviewer: Jay Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: October 15 2013 10:49 PM Title: The Lab Partner

Despite being pretty much a foot domination fan regarding this genre, your writing talent won me over and I am extremely grateful you took such care and time to produce such a great story. So many stories on sites that cater to this fetish come across as incoherrant that it was a breath of fresh air to read something so well-written. My only wish would be that in future stories, you include some forced foot-smelling and stuff. :) If you go with the family angle next, I definitely want to see foot stuff. But, given that you're the author, whatever you put out will no doubt be fantastic.



Author's Response:

Never thought I'd read 'breath of fresh air' and 'forced foot-smelling' in the same review, hahaha.

But seriously, thanks for the kind compliments.  I'll just be up front with you, though -- foot stuff just isn't my thing.  The most you'll ever see from me is some very brief foot worship and/or footplay in the future (as you saw once or twice in Pariah), but no more than that, sorry.

Reviewer: UpDownAndAllAround Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: October 15 2013 10:43 PM Title: The Lab Partner

If you do a story like this in a bro/sis scenario... to me, it could already be a nominee for one of my favorite stories on this site, also I actually for one I guess liked the ending.



Author's Response:

I do enjoy brother-sister scenarios (sibling rivalry, role reversal, etc.).  Admittedly, though, my real passion is father-daughter scenarios, and you'll definitely see that from me in the future.  But I'd say there's a good chance of brother/sister stuff along the way too.

Reviewer: aknouh Signed starstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: October 15 2013 9:12 PM Title: Epilogue

eh, i'll give it a b-



Author's Response:

Oh good, my marks on the Aknouh Grading Scale seem to be turning in the right direction.  Better than the 0.5 stars (F-minus?) I earned last time.

Reviewer: riczar Signed starstarstarhalf-star [Report This]
Date: October 15 2013 7:58 PM Title: Epilogue

I can't say I'm happy with the way things ended.  I've been rooting for an ending that leaves both Michelle and Nick living long happy lives, preferably with eachother.  You did do a good job of maintaining a sense of suspense and kept me guessing as to Michelle's true intentions to Nick's last moments.  The only thing I'd like to see in a potential sequel is perhaps a woman going through the same changes as Michelle, but makes a different choice.  Maybe Michelle decides to go with allowing a place for men in her new world (and not as toys/pets).

I hope to see more of your writing in the future.



Author's Response:

I can at least say that if I do write a sequel then not all relationships will develop like this.  Some women will be more kind and caring or even maternal, some will be happy leaving their man at a reasonable height and no further, and so on.  (However, to be honest, though, many of my stories will entail similarly disturbing toy-like/pet-like degradation and things like that, so don't get your hopes up too high).

Reviewer: Neurotic Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: October 15 2013 4:34 PM Title: The Lab Partner

An amazing story with masterful detail in Nick's slow degradation and demise. I do love the maniacal giantess on a mission to create a new world, I am a bit surprised to see that character change out of Michelle. I do like how you consciously made her aware of how she was becoming just as warped as Nick was in his dilemma. It was also masterful how Nick for him being as big a jackass as he was to become sympathetic, and vice-versa for Michelle.



Author's Response:

Yeah, I consciously kept from really revealing what her larger plans were until the very end (maybe gave some vague hints earlier on, but nothing more), really so I could focus on Nick and Michelle here and leave this 'revelation' as a change of focus and promise of future things at the end.  Anyways, hopefully this didn't seem too surprising/shocking to see this out of Michelle in terms of it feeling out of place with her character.  Hope not, anyway.  Mostly, I intended it to seem like she wasn't planning this all along, but in later chapters as her psychological changes took hold she started to develop these radical new-world thoughts.  And to a large extent, by the end, it's supposed to almost feel tragic, like she can't help herself and is almost 'fated' to carry out this goal (like I described in my comment below).

Anyway, thanks for the glowing comments, and I'm glad you enjoyed the ending (I knew there must be someone out there who would ... :P)

Reviewer: Jim1989 Signed starstarstar [Report This]
Date: October 15 2013 2:49 PM Title: Epilogue

Can't say I liked how the story ended.  Though it certainly took a spin in a new direction.  Curious if you'll be making a sequel to this particular story or start on something totally new.  I'm a little sad that Nick met the end that he did, even if there was a degree of mercy granted to him in his last moments.  And the final chapter does kind of convey Michelle as some power-hungry megalomaniac who intends to recreate the world so that everyone in it - and I mean literally EVERYONE in it - knows their place relative to her.  A big more arrogant than I care for.

Still, you did keep things suspenseful for the majority of the story and while things turned out a bit more glum than I was hoping for, it was an entertaining read on the whole.  Curious as to what you might be bringing out in the near future.  



Author's Response:

Yeah, she may be a power-hungry megalomaniac to some degree, but also I intended this to have an almost tragic note to it, as in she's no longer capable of stopping even herself now.  To some extent, her experiences in the past, and also what she did with Nick, made her this way even if she didn't fully realize what she was getting herself into at the time.  So is she arrogant?  Yes, maybe.  But perhaps in a way that makes you feel bad for her at the same time (at least that's my take on it).

To answer your question, yes I'm hoping to someday write a multi-part sequel to this, set in this new world Michelle's attempting to create.  But I might end up writing stories outside this 'universe' next instead.  Partly depends on how much time I have in the future to write.

And thanks for reading, and providing very interesting feedback :).

Reviewer: Jacksmith Signed [Report This]
Date: October 15 2013 9:48 AM Title: Epilogue

Congrats on wrapping your first story up.  You've shown a lot of admirable restraint in developing your characters over the course of this story, not to mention writing endurance in making it as long and thought out as it is.  You've mentioned before that you'll someday try writing a story involving siblings, so I eagerly look forward to your take on that subgenre.  Good work!



Author's Response:

Thanks.  Yeah, it was tough sometimes to keep going back and revising it instead of moving on to other thing.  I really like the end result though.

Yeah, you can look for future stories to revolve around different sorts of family dynamics, one of them being sibling rivalries and that kind of thing.

Reviewer: rebel6731 Signed [Report This]
Date: October 09 2013 9:11 PM Title: A New Delivery Method

A thorughly exciting story! Can't wait to see where it goes. Just joined to give you a bit of encouragement to finish it.

Cheers!



Author's Response:

Thanks, glad you like it enough to sign up for it :).  It'll be at least a few more days before I post the next chapter, fyi.  Maybe up to a week.

Reviewer: angeloflife Signed [Report This]
Date: October 06 2013 2:02 AM Title: A New Delivery Method

How many chapters are there before the end of the story?

And without giving too much away, would you say that the end of the story will not be a happy one, with Nick dead or so small that he will not have much of a life and with his family being sad for the lost of their son.

 

I dislike an ending where it ends bad for Nick and for Michelle to get away with what she did and she goes on to live a good life being tall and beautiful. His family is going to want their son back and to have Michelle pay for what she did.

 

In true i feel like the story just being drawn out now, to see how much suffering and tourcher Nick can be put through. Each chapter is of him suffering in someway with Michelle not looking like she really cares what happens to him or thinking with what his family will do once they find out.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

I just want you to know am trying not to sounding too harsh on what i say and seem like am putting you or your story down.

I just want to tell you how i feel on this story. After some point in the story it just started giving me a bad feeling to what was happening, but i want to see how it ends and thats way am still reading it even if am not liking what is going on.



Author's Response:

It's close to the end now.  I don't want to even say if it'll be happy or sad at this point because that'll give too much away.  Sorry you haven't enjoyed all the suffering and torture -- that's the part I enjoy the most.  But anyways, the story will wrap up pretty soon.

Reviewer: Jacksmith Signed [Report This]
Date: October 05 2013 11:42 PM Title: A New Delivery Method

This being a story of substantial size, I unfortunately haven't been around the site often enough to keep up, but the segments I've read, including this new one, were very well done.  You've clearly put a lot of effort into making something with a lot of depth here.  It's rare to see slow-shrink macro stories that actually have the restraint to tell a true slow-shrinking/growing story (or in your case, both) over time to really get into the heads of the characters and deliver a solid sense of pathos.  Plus, the interactions between your characters are quite sexy at times.  Well done.



Author's Response:

Thanks, I figured you had lost interests but glad that's not the case.  Yep, this story's a long one alright, just realized it's on the top-ten longest stories list now :O.  Yeah, this story was quite an undertaking, with a lot of time put into it including rewrites and things like that.  It was exhausting, but fun.  And I'm glad to see it paid off.

Reviewer: Gtslover4 Signed [Report This]
Date: October 05 2013 10:54 PM Title: A New Delivery Method

I liked the idea of this story ending with Nick going back to his tall self and Michelle going back to her short nerdy self but instead of going back to being mean to her Nick would end up dating her anyway much to the surprise of his friends due to learning the error of his ways. Obviously you didn't choose that path. Anyway it's been a nice read. Hoping Michelle sees justice for her behavior but that's just how I feel.

Author's Response:

Errr ... sorry, it's taking me a few read-throughs to parse that first sentence there.  It's a doozy, lol, and I'm up too late as it is :P

Yeah, I don't think I'm spoiling much at this point in saying it's too late now to completely reverse everything (height-wise) and return to normalcy given their current emotional states and the irreversible damage that's been done -- which I could understand possibly being partly reversed had the 'regrowth' potion worked, but even still I feel like the domination she put him through was too intense to simply undo in that fashion (in my opinion anyway) (plus, too, I enjoy darker stories anyway).

How's THAT for a long sentence, lol.

Reviewer: Jim1989 Signed [Report This]
Date: October 04 2013 11:05 PM Title: Through the Camera

Things are looking pretty ominous for Nick.  My gut says he's gonna shrink at least one more time for Michelle (maybe go under a foot in height the next time he does).  Also wondering if he'll end up dying by the story's end.  It's pretty plausible that he would willingly end his life if it meant pleasing Michelle with one last increase of height and mass, given his mental state now.  It really boils down to whether Michelle will have it be so or if she'll end things on a less tragic note.  I like to think there's some shred of compassion left in her, even though it seems her dominant side appears to be winning out in general.

Also curious as to who Michelle's sponsors are.  I'm guessing they probably are none too pleased at her broadcasted declaration in the last chapter.  And Michelle herself must have some kind of endgame plan for her to so brazenly declare to everyone what she did.  It'll only be a matter of time (days at the most) before someone influential starts asking questions.  Curious how Michelle will work out this development when it comes.

As always, well-written and inriguing stuff.  Looking forward to the next chapter.



Author's Response:

Thanks, I'll try to get the next chapter posted pretty soon

Reviewer: riczar Signed starstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: October 03 2013 7:42 AM Title: The Lab Partner

I hope this is the author trying to keep us guessing, but I get a feeling that things aren't going to end with Nick living a long and happy life.  Plus Michelle spilling the beans herself confuses me a bit.  I can't tell if she's trying to punish herself for what she did or she thinks she can get away with it in the end.  A thought I had for restoring some of Nick's functionality, would be to shrink him further, but instead of the mass going to Michelle, it converts to muscle mass and brain capacity.  He's be smaller and brainwashed, but at least he'd be a decent companion for Michelle.

Still a good story and I'm looking forward to the next chapter.



Author's Response:

Interesting thoughts.  I won't say anything else for now to keep from spoiling things, though.  Thanks for reading.

Reviewer: angeloflife Signed [Report This]
Date: October 03 2013 3:05 AM Title: Through the Camera

How tall is Michelle and Nick now?

Is Michelle's plan is she thinking this formula is going to make her rich? I hope its not one of these formulas that only work for females and not work for males because that is getting so old to hear.

If you are going to make a formula, make one that can work for both female and male.

 

I find it was arrogance on her part to think that others were all beneath her. What kind of thinking is that? Does she think she is something more than them?  Because she is not above them she is still just a stupid human also.

Oh am smarter, taller, better looking than everyone now so that must make me above them. As others could hardly believe that she was still a human being like them.

They are stupid for thinking that like she is something more than human. She is still human and a power hungry drug junkie. 

 

I sill hope to see Michelle get some kind of payback to for what she did to Nick. She did so many bad things to him just for her own self. So she got taller and a little bit more smarter and grew curves she is not better she wont be till she changes Nick back.

 

I do look forward to the end of this and to see what happens to them.



Author's Response:

Heights: I have Michelle at just over 7' tall now, and Nick at 18 inches.  I debated whether to put in more exact measurements throughout the story or leave it more vague and partly up to the readers' imaginations.  But if enough people want specific height references I'm fine with going back and put them in here and there.

"I hope its not one of these formulas that only work for females and not work for males because that is getting so old to hear.  If you are going to make a formula, make one that can work for both female and male." -->  I wouldn't say that it's a matter of whether it's "getting old" or not -- there's a reason why the female-only route is common, and that's because it really is a fundamental decision based on the author's own preferences and what he enjoys.  I for one would hate a story where males are able to grow along with females; it just doesn't make sense for the type of story and interactions I'm interested in.  Not to reveal where I'm going with Pariah necessarily; just saying in general.

Basically: I respect your right to voice your own opinions, but it won't be able to sway me at all unless it's something I also enjoy (which, in this case, is not the case).

Likewise with Michelle's "god complex".  Certainly, you're right, just because she's bigger/prettier/smarter doesn't mean she's ACTUALLY better than everyone, especially not in a moral sense -- but that's the point, actually.  Men look up to her and they know it's wrong to hold her above all other women just because she's hotter/taller/more imposing ... but it's because it feels so morally wrong that it also feels exciting and taboo and they can't help but want to worship her, even as wrong as they know that is.  And likewise with Michelle, knowing she's able to inspire such impulses in men now, it makes her want to abuse her power in ways she knows are immoral in the conventional sense of the word.

So again, like I said last time, you kinda have to have the right sexual fetish to enjoy this kind of thing, otherwise the story doesn't really make sense.  And again, I don't mind these conversations we're having, I find it interesting to see different people's perspectives; just realize, though, that there's no one "right" answer and everyone views things differently.

Glad you're looking forward to the rest though :P

 

Reviewer: Flaming_Heart Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: October 02 2013 10:17 PM Title: Through the Camera

So the truth is finally out, she shrunk him on purpose.

To bad Nick can't really understand anything now. But Nice chapter and cliffhanger.

Author's Response:

Thanks :).

Oh, but you know that Nick already knows she did all this to him on purpose by now, right?  Maybe I'm misreading you, but it was only supposed to be a revelation for the public, not for Nick who already knows.  Just want to make sure I made this clear enough in the chapter before this, or if I need to rewrite anything for clarity.

Reviewer: angeloflife Signed [Report This]
Date: September 27 2013 3:13 AM Title: Michelle's Return

I dislike what both of them had become not that they were any better at the start of the story, he was a big jerk and she was a know it all jerk.

Now she is a bad know it all jerk and he is just feeble. She just took everything from him, as you wrote it went way beyond some chemistry project for a grade. She could have just ruined his whole life and his family’s also. He is a son, his family when they see what had become of their son they are not going to be very happy at Michelle.

 

Yes he did try to rape her and he may have to pay for it like some of the things she put him through but after a point she went beyond that, she took his free will, his body and his mind.

The best way I see this ending is something in the middle for the both of them. She restores his mind but his not the jerk he was, she gives him his height back but not all the way maybe leaving him around six feet tall and not quite as athletic as he was but still on the handsome side.


Michelle at the cost of restoring of his mind, loses a bit of her intellect that she had at the start of the story, at the cost of restoring his height loses almost all the height she gained from him leaving her around 5’6 but keeps most of the looks she gained
like her curves and such and is a bit more on the athletic side now.

 

As for giving Nick the formula to return him, she might have to try giving it by a needle into him with her drinking it.

 ---------------------------------------------------------------

My thoughts on the whole manipulation and torment thing.

 

I find that at some point it wouldn’t even be that. He couldn’t really fight back and was helpless with little to no way of fight back to her what would make the whole torment thing worthless, if you are going to torment someone for sexual satisfaction wouldn’t you want them to be able to fight back somewhat at the point Nick has reach Michelle might as well tormenting a baby or a small animal seeing as he couldn't fight her back.

 

There was manipulation throughout the story, but once again he reached a point that it didn’t feel like he was getting manipulated by her as it felt he lost all his free will to even get manipulated by her.

 

Since am not into that type of thing and dislike it my thoughts on it may not sound right to what I want to say.



Author's Response:

Sure man, I get it.  We all have our own particular sexual proclivities, so that's cool if yours don't align with mine.  There isn't much to be done about that.

As for your later point; "if you are going to torment someone for sexual satisfaction wouldn't you want them to be able to fight back."  Not necessarily, but I see your point.  I usually prefer stories where the shrunken male always resists and tries to fight back (that's partly why I don't read much micro-gts or stuff like that, since at that point it's utterly hopeless to fight back).  However, at the same time, it can also be very appealing to me at times to have a guy utterly helpless and the girl just torment him for the fun of it.  Like, for instance, a BDSM scenario where the guy is completely immobilized and helpless and the girl is free to do anything she pleases to him.  May be a similar kind of thing here in this story.  So what you're saying is not necessarily true for everyone.

Also, to me, the story has become even more interesting now, as now he actually finds himself wanting to be tortured -- it's not really even about him resisting her anymore, he actually wants to be degraded and humiliated -- and all the interesting implications that brings.  So yeah, this story is definitely catered to people like me who can relate to that type of paradoxical or at times self-destructive desire to be fully helpless at the hands of a cruel/dominant woman, and therefore to an outsider who might not share this desire, this concept probably doesn't quite 'click' or make sense.

 

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