Reviews For Antoinette
You must login (register) to review.
Reviewer: Sandwich Signed [Report This]
Date: April 08 2010 5:18 PM Title: Chapter 1

You may want to watch your  sentence structures. Not breaking the mold of SUBJECT verbed the OBJECT can lead to very boring narrative. For instance, in chapters 2,3,4,5 and 6 there is only one paragraph taht doesn't use the word 'Nickolas' in the first line. This makes it different to pace your story in an engaging or interesting way and can make it seem flat.

 

I hope you don't feel like i'm being unfair, but constructive criticism never hurt anyone who acted upon it

Reviewer: ASmallPill Signed [Report This]
Date: April 08 2010 4:50 PM Title: Chapter 1

Thanks for the good reviews everyone, I’ve had a lot of time to write lately so hopefully I’ll be able to add at least a chapter every day for some time.

You must login (register) to review.

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended.