Date: September 23 2013 3:35 PM Title: Chapter 7: Small
It's because I'm not used to a paragraph being laid out that manner. Whenever I read a story I expect the speech and the description to be separated out. Although I don't read published books that often, in English class I was taught to have sentences containing descripion and speech on separate lines. I feel that makes story easier to follow and it's the only way I know how write a story because that's what I taught in school.
Author's Response:
It is true, you'll generally see a breaking up of actions and dialogue over a paragraph, though in technical terms you don't have to unless it's a new speaker. I do agree it's nicer to look at when broken up regardless, which is why I try to do that more on my stories nowadays.
Date: September 23 2013 3:55 AM Title: Chapter 7: Small
In the paragraph that starts with the word "Phillip" (probably the largest paragraph but I'm not counting) there does seem to be an issue with formatting in that you haven't separated out the speech of the various characters.
Author's Response:
Not quite sure what you mean there, as Caroline is the only one with dialogue in that paragraph.
[Report This]Date: June 02 2011 2:52 PM Title: Chapter 7: Small
What an amazing story! I honestly think it's one of the best, most realistic stories I've seen on this site so far. Each new chapter is more intriguing tham the last. I have honestly no idea how Caroline will cope with growing even larger than she is now, (can only imagine how frightening it must be for her) but I hope she does.