Date: November 22 2019 11:57 AM Title: Chapter 18: One Small Step for Man, One Small Bite for Maggie
Wow, did Maggie enjoy abusing his member like this? Does she intend to go further that way in?
Date: November 19 2014 8:05 AM Title: Chapter 18: One Small Step for Man, One Small Bite for Maggie
Pinnacle of Maggie's cruelty? I'm really really glad to hear it!
I was thinking he should ask his brother to call Ella and tell her about the no-phone rule, but I guess it's a bit too late for that.
It's a bit weird that he lost a golden chance to delay his part of the deal: I was expecting something like "still scared from being in mommy's mouth, I may involuntarily stutter or something, give me 24h to recover" could have worked - it makes sense, increases the % of the deal being respected without accidents, and I guess Maggie would love to keep him thinking about it for hours and basically make him regret having the idea... but I guess when she wants something she just can't wait!
Author's Response:
That's not a bad idea about Kyle, since he knows Maggie can be so vindictive, but Scott's probably a little too nervous after his last encounter with his brother.
You're right that Maggie wasn't in the mood to wait; she makes him stew in anxiety often enough that this time she just went for it.
[Report This]Date: November 17 2014 8:46 PM Title: Chapter 18: One Small Step for Man, One Small Bite for Maggie
Gosh, neither of them are getting away with this lightly, are they? This whole chapter just lights up signals for a harsh punishment.
Nonconsentual mouthplay isnt very high on my list of favorite interactions, but you've done it very well.
Maggie's raw sadism makes my stomach churn like no other character, so I wouldn't mind her getting the short end of the deal this time. Really, I wouldn't mind at all.
For better or worse, I'm looking forward to a change in character. I'm not sure if my weak heart can take much more of Scott's suffering.
Author's Response:
Thanks for reading. I definitely intended for this chapter to feel like a pinnacle for Maggie's cruelty in terms of her sadism being at an all-time high, though there is a bit of a silver lining coming up soon for Scott, if that's any consolation.
[Report This]Date: November 17 2014 7:02 PM Title: Chapter 18: One Small Step for Man, One Small Bite for Maggie
Great chapter. Ifound little spelling/grammar mistakes. The one I found was "...beneath her and escape it for however long he had to to fend off a breakdown.". You have a repeated to. I don't know if you wanted a different word or what. I know everyone makes mistakes and this story is almost perfect, in my eyes. Just thought I should point it out if you had something else in mind. I love the dominieering attittude. I cannot wait to see what happens next. For me I like almost anything with shrunken people as long as its not with giants and that it fits the characters personalities. No a few others along with myself wished for this to happen since we were reading the incident with his mom and the lead up in chapter 17. I just hope Maggie get more "creative" than copying what her mom does. Now on to the general story outline. I read some posts on how they would want Scott to enjoy it or that they should be less "severe". However to me its weird if he enjoys his "imprisonment" and that he would enjoy being shrunk down by his family. I also hope you do not change any of there behaviors. They seem to fit perfectly with my image in my mind. Some people like the wuthor to tweek jis characters to fit there image. I believe this is wrong. I have read about the same characters since they showed up in "Mommy's Time out".
Author's Response:
Thanks for the review! That actually isn't a typo, as it's saying "however long he had to," then the infinitive of fend, so "however long he had to to fend off," if that makes sense; I agree it could've been worded better. Maggie will be doing a bit more mouthplay than her mom, as there's still more to come in the next couple chapters. I don't plan on having Scott enjoy his imprisonment, particularly since there are some nasty punishments coming his way soon. I can't say there won't be some shifts in character in this story and the next one, but I promise there will be a reason for it (as opposed to me just changing things up due to boredom). I appreciate hearing your thoughts.
[Report This]Date: November 17 2014 9:20 AM Title: Chapter 18: One Small Step for Man, One Small Bite for Maggie
Another great chapter, keep up the good work :)
Author's Response:
Thanks!