Reviewer: youre_my_slave Signed [Report This]
Date: May 21 2020 9:43 PM Title: Chapter 16: Play

Quarantine is the only thing that reminded you this story exists :-: that makes me a little sad because I literally wait on this story with baited breath. (Also I feel guilty for never finishing my own stories which is why I've stuck to one shots every 365 days)

I hope you plan to tell us more about the "Old Lands" and how exactly the tomkins got here. I'm also curious, the tomkins are undeniably medieval, I had assumed the humans of this world were also at leas medieval up until the war when shit started going downhill. (Like you know, how every time an "apocalypic event" is predicted and all of the modern world frets about being forced back into the pioneer days. Or in plain English "they aren't primitives, but circumstances dictate they have to live that way".

Also I'm inclined to conclude that the reason humans and tomkins can't talk to each other is because the humans saw it as much good as talking to a cow, "you're halfwitted at best and also food so nothing you have to say  would be of use to me". OH. OH WAIT. OOH. Ok so a couple chapters back Teagan learns the word for sword is "gladdui" and can't think of an english equivalent. ... "gladiator"? I mean I know the answer is going to be "OH MY GOD YOU STUPID BITCH I'M WRITING PORN CALM DOWN" but I just want to know more about tomkins. They speak a latin-like language, apparently use Roman-like ranks in militia (yah I looked up if "Legate" was a real word) BUILD YOUR WORLD, BUILD IT HIGH BBY.

 

.... I'm sorry I'm spamming you with reviews ...and that they're all from me.

Author's Response:

Sad as it is, it's true - I just haven't had the time to sit down for a few hours and type away for a while. Now there are actually times when I have nothing to do, and well, about a week ago, I suddenly decided to spend half an hour guessing my password so I could continue writing a story I left unfinished for ~4 years. Oh, and about the reviews - don't be sorry! I'm super happy that you're invested in the plot! I definitely think about it first, and then add the other bits as an afterthought - "oh, yeah, people come here to get their kicks, welp, better add a few sentences about sadistic/deranged/sexy/vorey/all of the abovey stuff" (not to imply that I'm not also into it). As for real world references, yeah, I'm not creative enough to invent an entirely new civilization, so I more or less stole the tomkin language from Latin as a whole, and took a general inspiration from later Greco-Roman culture as a whole for them like the discount wannabe historian I am.

Of course, if I'm being honest, I also used the language barrier thing as a way to avoid having to write dialogue, which, in 2016 (when I may or may not have been old enough to actually use this site), I was very awkward at, trying waaayyy too hard to give every character a unique voice and struggling helplessly in the process. Looking at my older chapters and comparing them to my newer ones, whew, I'm kinda glad I made that choice.