After his parents were killed at Haley’s Circus, Dick Grayson was adopted by fellow performer Kathy Kane. But with the Flying Grayson parents gone, the circus business went into decline, and soon they couldn’t afford to make ends meet.
“Dick, you’ll have to take Peter Porkchops, our last pig into market and get a good price for him,” said Kathy.
Dick put Peter on a leash and walked him into the town of Gotham, where he met a couple who had their own flower stall at the market, namely Louie the Lilac and his wife Poison Ivey (formerly Miss Pamela Eisley).
“If you’ll sell us your pig, we can pay you with my superior seeds,” said Mrs Lilac, “Just throw them into your garden, and they’ll plant themselves and grow wondrously overnight.”
Dick made the deal, and went home to Kathy. Sure enough, she tossed the seeds out the window, convinced that Dick had been conned out of (well not their bread and butter, but their pork and bacon at least).
The next morning, Dick awoke to find that a huge beanstalk had grown outside his bedroom window, and proceeded to climb it, until he emerged in a huge garden. He walked over to a giant castle, snuck under the door and found a beautiful woman in a cage.
“I’m the golden Harbinger,” she said, “Aunty Monitor projected me into this storybook land, where my teleportation powers don’t work. I was captured by a huge woman called Giganta and put in this cage.”
She told Dick where the giantess kept the key, and Dick freed the golden Harbinger and fled with her back down the beanstalk. Once they were back on earth, she found that her powers did work. She became a huge attraction at the circus, and business flourished for many years as the circus went on tour again.
Kathy sold the house to a Mrs Todd, who’d been widowed by Harvey Dent alias Two-Face. Since the beanstalk was still there, her son Jason decided to climb it and soon found himself sneaking in and exploring the giant castle too.
Suddenly he heard the loud voice of a giant woman coming down the hall:
Fee fie fo fabulous fodder.
I smell one who’s not much more than a Todd-ler.
Be he one who might have been Robin,
Now he’s only good for gobblin’!
Into the room walked the beautiful giant woman Doris Zuell. Jason ran for his life, but the giantess strode effortlessly across the room and reached down and grabbed him.
“Someone like you stole my golden Harbinger, you little crook!” she said.
“That wasn’t me. That was Dick, and it sounds like you stole the golden Harbinger’s freedom from her,” said Jason.
“Well I’m about to prove you can have your crook and eat it,” said Giganta, and carried her captive into the kitchen and put him in the oven on the slow warm roast setting.
He looked out at her yellow dress, with its orangey red spots on it, her long red hair, her full lips, her round cheeks, and her powerful bare arms. If he had to be eaten, he couldn’t think of a better way to go.