I awoke to a familiar sting on my forearm. In spite of the pain, I resisted the temptation to bolt upright. All Fyth’s avoided movement, especially quick movement, until accounting for human life in the area — an instinct so strong it bookended all conscious thought.

“‘Bout time. Now sit up.” The gruff command preceded another sting to the same location. The hoarse voice, perhaps altered from a lifetime of yelling, didn’t belong to Kenji. “Ain’t got all day.”

I rose from my side, pushing myself against the dewy grass until I sat facing the man. He wore a flannel shirt, sleeves rolled back and a button missing at the peak of his round stomach. Like albino snakes, gray strands wove in and out of his long beard and a white bull whip undulated on the ground.

“Up.” He cracked the whip against my knee. “And be quick about it.”

I lowered my hand, waited until he boarded, and lifted him to my face. He was the type of man I was accustomed to working with, hard and efficient. His squinty eyes scanned me with merited disdain, and his yellow, gap-toothed frown reminded me of my near worthlessness.

“Looks like the boy went and done it.” He spoke and chewed on something stuffed in his cheek. “Need a new tractor to clear the field; he gets me this instead. Had to pick the ugliest one I ever seen too. His old man be turnin’ in his grave. Probably gave you a name, didn’t he?”

“Yes, sir. My name is —” I flinched as the whip struck my cheekbone.

“I didn’t ask what your name was. When you’re working with me, your name is...Fugly. Because you’re so fuckin’ ugly. Ya hear me?”

I nodded, glancing at the whip, its tip now tinged with red.

“Prove it. What’s your name?”

“F—Fugly, sir.”

“It ain’t F-F-Fugly.” He spat on my hand, a brown liquid that smelled of tobacco and sulfur. “Say it again, you idiot.”

“Fugly, sir.”

“And why is that you’re name?”

“Because I’m ugly.”

“Ain't you got a brain? Cain’t remember what I said two seconds ago? You’re fuckin’ ugly. Now say it right.”

“I’m not allowed to curse, sir.”

“I don’t care.” He glowered, face turning red. “Say it.”

“No, sir.”

He exposed his rotten teeth in a vicious grimace, and raised his whip. “Worthless.” He struck my left cheek. “Brainwashed.” Another strike. “Stupid.” Strike. “Ugly.” Strike.

Breathing heavily, he bent over, hands on his knees. Tears rolled down my cheeks, intensifying the wounds. I’d disappointed him and couldn’t think of a way to make it right. If only I hadn’t been born so ugly, he wouldn’t be so upset. If only I could make myself presentable, he wouldn’t be so repulsed.

“Alright, Fugly.” He spat the remainder of his tobacco wad into my palm. “Name’s Carl. I work for Kenji, but quite frankly, the boy don’t know shit about runnin’ a farm. While he’s at school, I’m the boss. Understood?”

“Yes, sir.”

“He’s a fuckin’ pacifist, so you’ll cover those marks with dirt.” He pointed to my cheek and I nodded.

“Put me down. I can’t stand to look at your ugly mug no more.”

I lowered my hand. Before stepping off, he ground the tobacco wad into my skin with his boot.

“Lick your hand clean.”

“Yes, sir.” I licked my palm and fingers, repeatedly, drawing the dirt, sweat, and spit into my mouth. Though it tasted bad, I continued until my skin glistened. Sometimes humans needed parts of a Fyth’s body to be cleaned, and because of our size, we often used the most convenient washrag: our tongues. He probably had a good reason for the request.

“Good.” He grinned and scratched his beard. “Now stick your hand in the dirt and rub it on your face.”

I hid my disappointment; I could've done that without cleaning my hand first. Right? I didn’t understand Carl, but he worked for Kenji and he was human, so I gave him the benefit of the doubt.

The mud stuck to my face and cooled my wound. My saliva had helped moisten the dirt, allowing it to stick better. That made sense; humans really did know best!

“Alright.” His grin broadened. “Now grab a handful of dirt and eat it.”

I blinked. “I’m sorry, sir?”

“You heard me.” His grin dropped.

I quickly used my other hand to scoop a pile of dirt into my palm and brought it to my mouth. Afraid of angering him further, I dumped it on my tongue without delay, and waited for the mass to get wet. After a few seconds, I swallowed, barely suppressing my urge to gag. The rocks scratched my throat as they descended, but a smile tugged at my mouth because I’d done it. Surely he had another good reason for the request.

He burst into laughter, holding his stomach and stomping his foot. “So fucking stupid. So funny, I can’t breathe.”

I’d made him happy, but it felt nothing like making Lyric happy last night. My stomach constricted and a cloudy mass formed at the base of my skull, not from the dirt, but from his reaction.

I missed Lyric and Kenji. I understood them no better than Carl, but they filled me with joy. Carl had the opposite effect, emptying me, even worse than Branford. Much worse — something about Carl’s laughter ate away at my insides.

“Alright, Fugly. That’s enough fun for now. See that field over there?” He pointed to an area beyond the cow pasture. “I want all the rocks removed from the ground by the time Kenji gets home.”

“Ok.” That sounded like fun. “Where should I put them?”

“Eat them, of course.”

My eyes widened and my mouth slackened. My body could digest anything, excreting waste as sweat, thankfully a pleasant smell to most humans. But eating so many rocks would not be possible.

“Relax.” He smirked. “Just pile them up behind the barn.” Then, his expression deadened. “But if you’re not done in time, I really will make you eat them until you can’t stand. Understand me?”

“Yes, sir.”

“Now get to work.”

***

On hands and knees, I crawled over the expansive field. My fingers plowed the earth, digging up weeds and other vegetation that didn’t belong. Lacking a suitable container, I removed my top and piled the dirt onto it. Anything smaller than the holes in natural stitching sifted through, leaving rocks, small and large, behind. Luckily, my clothing had been designed with durability in mind.

I simply ate the plants. Where else would I put them? I dared not ask Carl; I’d already upset him too much for the day. Organic matter digested much faster than inorganic, so my stomach experienced no capacity problems. Furthermore, the meal would delay my need for Rouean, surely a benefit to Kenji’s finances.

As I made trips back to the barn, I glanced at Carl feeding the calves and milking the cows. I admired the way he worked. Smaller animals often feared me, limiting the tasks I could perform on a farm. 

During the afternoon, Carl rested under an oak tree, drinking from a silver flask. Humans needed a regular source of hydration, but the flask seemed so small. Perhaps it contained something other than water, something more concentrated and more rejuvenating.

He also watched me, probably making sure I didn’t screw up. An odd grin crossed his face each time I made a trip back. With eyes fixed to my torso, he likely watched the rocks I carried at my stomach, making sure I didn’t spill any. So thoughtful. His demonstration of teamwork made me want to smile.

We finished clearing the field just before Kenji’s truck pulled into the driveway. Last night, I’d lifted the rear of the truck and he’d replaced the tire. The repair was a success, allowing him to attend his university classes.

Bubbling with excitement, I proceeded to the driveway, scarcely restraining my stride. I stepped lightly around the house, its roof reaching just past my knee. Once clear, I balanced on the balls of my feet and lowered myself.

“Welcome home, Kenji!”

He stopped at the patio and chuckled. “Well, it’s good to be back. How was —” He blushed and looked away. “Where’s your clothing?”

“Oh, it’s behind the house. I had to use my top for —”

“I don’t care. Just please put your clothes back on before Lyric gets here.”

“Yes, sir. Sorry.”

He headed into the house and I went back to pick up my linens. I carried the fabric away from the barn and whipped it several times to remove the dust. I’d forgotten about human modesty! Hopefully he wasn’t too mad at me.

Kenji exited the back door and met with Carl. I wrapped my chest and joined the meeting, eager to show our accomplishment. Maybe he’d compliment me, like yesterday.

“What the hell are the rocks doing beside the barn?” Kenji walked toward the pile. “It’s a fucking mountain.”

Carl shrugged, following Kenji. “The Fyth said that’s where you wanted them.”

“Her name is Alani.” Kenji glared up at me. “And I never told you to pile the rocks beside the barn.”

“I…” Didn’t Carl tell me to put them there? That couldn’t be right, could it? My memory didn’t match the truth coming from Carl. Once again my forgetfulness caused trouble.

Kenji sighed, and touched a large rock at the bottom of the pile. Then, of all things, he started laughing. “It’s taller than the barn.”

I couldn’t believe it. He wasn’t mad at me. Branford would have lashed me for such a mistake, but Kenji laughed. And it was a good laugh, a forgiving laugh, one that made me smile from ear to ear. I knelt to hear it better.

“You gonna let her get away with that?” Carl asked.

“Well, she certainly cleared the field,” Kenji said through chuckles.

“Carl helped me clear it,” I said, eager to share the praise with my co worker.

“Boss, you gotta discipline her.” Carl offered his whip.

Kenji’s laughter died. “Did you hit her with that?”

Carl hesitated. “Not yet, but —”

“Alani, did he whip you?”

I swallowed, unable to answer. Carl did hit me, but he denied it and the wound had healed hours ago, a side effect of drinking Rouean recently. Did I forget something? Surely I’d deserved the beating.

“Alani, answer me.”

“I’m sorry…” I blinked back the moisture in my eyes.

Kenji turned to Carl. “If you ever bring that whip here again, I’ll fire you; I don’t care how long you worked for my father. And if you hit her with it again, I’ll beat the living shit out of you.”

“Boss, she’s an animal.” Carl’s face was beet red. “You can’t let an animal, especially one that large, go undisciplined. If your father were here —”

“You have one minute to leave this property. Tomorrow, you’ll return without the whip and you’ll call her by her name, or don’t bother coming back at all. Got it?”

Carl started to speak but snapped his mouth shut and looked at me. A little smile alighted upon his face before he walked away. Had he forgiven me? Hopefully, he’d return tomorrow so I could apologize to him.

“Alani!” Lyric bolted out the back door. She discarded her flowery backpack on the rocking chair before running across the yard. Carl paused to look at her before he continued walking around the side of the house to his truck. He drove away as Lyric jumped into my outstretched hand and hugged my thumb.

Nothing could describe the feeling of holding someone so delicate and beautiful. The polar opposite of me in every way, she graced me with affection, her little arms wrapping around my digit in spite of my filth. By the time she released me, a vertical streak of dirt coated the front of her overalls.

“Lyric, you’re taking a bath before dinner tonight.” Kenji walked toward the front of the barn.

“Wow!” She ran to the rock pile. “Look Alani, it’s a mountain.” Her eyes lit up and I wished I could see through them. To me the thigh-high mound was nothing like a mountain, but humans saw things differently, and I wanted to share in her fascination.

However, when she started climbing, I realized my mistake. Children injured so easily, and her entrancement with this pile would lead to nothing good. I’d absolutely needed to move the stones before an accident occurred.

“Alani, come here.” Kenji called from the front of the barn. “I want to show you something.”

“Lyric, will you come with me?” I refused to leave her unattended.

“Wait, I’m almost —” Halfway up, she slipped and fell backwards into my hand. Her shocked expression quickly gave way to giggles, but her joy eluded me. If I hadn’t caught her…

“Alani!” Kenji called.

“Coming.” I carried Lyric to the front of the barn, still nervous from her tumble. Though she’d landed in my palm, I scanned her body, making sure she hadn’t been hurt. A fall, even from a low height, could result in all types of injuries for humans. I reeled at the possibilities.

On her knees, Lyric scooted to my fingers and peeked between them while I knelt to look inside the barn. Bags of seed and fertilizer lined one wall; hoes, rakes, scythes and other equipment adorned the opposite side. Except for an all-terrain vehicle, the center was clear.

“I put your food here, Alani.” He gestured to an area on the right where burlap covered a rectangular stack. “Only three meals remain, but eat when you get hungry. I can buy more.”

I swallowed the saliva that drenched my mouth, amazed that he trusted me with such information. Branford had never shown me where he kept the Rouean. I vowed to wait as long as possible between each meal. Kenji’s trust meant more than satiating my hunger and his sacrifice moved me — he’d sold his motorcycle to feed me.

Though I would drink Rouean every day if given the choice, my body could sustain itself for a week between meals. I wouldn’t succumb to gluttony, but the knowledge of the food’s availability filled me with relief beyond measure.

“Kenji, where would you like me to move the rocks?” I asked, Lyric’s near accident plaguing my mind.

He scratched his head. “Well, I was thinking the other side of the lake. We don’t use that area —”

“The lake!” Lyric jumped up and I formed a protective wall with my other hand. “Can we go swimming, Kenji? Please!”

“It’s a school night. You know —”

“Please! Just for a few minutes?”

Kenji shook his head and looked at his wristwatch. “Fine. No more than thirty minutes. Get your bathing suit on.”

“Yay!”

***

Lyric burst from the house in a maroon swimsuit with a white floral design. She must really like flowers. They didn’t taste any better than weeds, but they were far more colorful and smelled ‘better’. Humans, especially girls, liked colorful, nice-smelling things.

“Alright, lets go.” Kenji patted the passenger seat of an ATV with the word GATOR on the side.

She ignored him and ran to my ankle. “I’m riding on Alani.”

“Lyric, you don’t ride on her. She’s not an animal and she might not want to go to the lake.”

I winced at his tone of voice. Most humans did consider me an animal, and I didn’t mind. I certainly would never reprimand her for making such an assumption.

“Alani, will you go to the lake with me?” she pleaded.

“Sure...if Kenji doesn’t mind.”

“You don’t have to ask me. Go anytime you want. Lyric, you’ve got twenty-five minutes. See you two down there.” The engine of the GATOR revved and he took off.

“Quick, Alani!” She hopped into my hand. “We have to beat him there.”

“Why?”

“We just do. Please!”

“Ok.” I rose slowly, aware she’d never experienced a ride my full height before.

“Wow!” She looked through my fingers, and I cupped my other hand to her left. “Go! Hurry!”

I walked, taking slightly longer strides than usual, easily catching up to the GATOR. Kenji looked back, grinned and the little vehicle speed up, bumping along the terrain ahead.

“He’s racing us, Alani!” She gripped one of my fingers and tried to shake it. “Go faster.”

I smiled and easily outpaced the little machine, beating it to the lake by several seconds. She cheered as I lowered her to the ground, her enthusiasm at the trivial victory as baffling as it was contagious.

“We won, we won!” She ran up to parked ATV and planted her hands on the hood.

“Yeh, and you’ve got twenty minutes.” He reached into the box bed and retrieved a book, Molecular Biology Fifth Edition.

She waded into the water and clasped her hands around her torso, shivering. “Alani, you get in first.”

Although the lake was quite large, that didn’t mean it was deep. I stepped into the water slowly, but created rolling ripples nonetheless, inducing squeals of delight from Lyric. I continued onward until the water level reached my belly button.

My feet squished into the muddy lakebed and, as I submerged my body, the cool water soothed my slightly sunburnt skin. I scrubbed my hair underwater, luxuriating in the cold. My fingers combed through masses of tangles, freeing knotted clumps and dispersing weeks of dirt. I continued until my scalp tingled, a euphoric sensation, then rose for a breath.

“Whoa.” Lyric was in up to her stomach now, arms hovering over the water like an armchair. “Kenji look!”

My dangling hair, its greenish hue restored, obscured my view. I pulled it back, splashed water in my face, and rubbed.

“Wow.” He set his book aside. I glanced behind me, trying to find what caught his attention.

“Alani.” She wore a mesmerized smile. “You’re so pretty.”

I didn’t know how to respond. Though infrequent, I’d taken baths before. But never had I garnered such a reaction. Men had looked at me differently, but there had always been an underlying hint of disgust.

Did Kenji think the same thing as Lyric? Is that why he stared at me with his mouth hanging partway open? I blushed. I shouldn’t care about being pretty, but her comment and his attention made me feel better than consuming premium Rouean.

Once again, I failed to understand the reasons for my emotions, but it didn’t matter — I’d never been happier.

Maybe Kenji would join us in the water. That would be fun.