I looked over my shoulder to see Jessica, unstirred, sleeping in perfect serenity. She was my problem now, my caravan to escort. How the hell was I gonna get her to the Hudson? What would I even tell her? I wondered how much longer I'd have until she found out about--

"Dustin!" Jessica suddenly exclaimed, startling herself awake.

"What's wrong, Jessica?"

She darted her gaze around frantically for a while, fear in her eyes, then settled on me and smiled.

"I'm drunk," she whispered, though I heard it clearly.

"How can you be drunk?" I asked.

"'Cuz I'm fucked in the brain!" she laughed, swatting her hair around like some giant cat. I wasn't sure how to respond to that; it was true, but what was she getting at? "I need you to do something for me, Dustin."

"What's that?"

"Call the army and have 'em kill me. I'm tired, I'm ready to go to bed and never wake up. You know how you have the little angel and little demon on your shoulder? Well my demon's strangling my angel and it's coughing out its last words," she giggled. "It's silly, isn't it? But I'm done with living, so if you could drop a nuke on me or something that'd be cool."

"Jessica, I--"

"Shhh, don't tell me," she said, holding a finger to her mouth, her eyes half-open. She giggled again and added, "I wouldn't like if you told me that. Other Jessica wouldn't like that at all."

I understood and closed my mouth.

"I'm gonna cry myself to sleep later, and when I wake up, I'm probably gonna wanna kill people." She rolled over onto her back and looked at me with upside down eyes. "'Cuz I'm fucked in the brain, remember?!" she added with a laugh, responding to my silence. "So tomorrow, try to do something to distract me, I guess, I dunno. What do people usually do to stop giant women from eating them?" She broke into laughter as she said that, tears in her eyes. I was becoming rather uncomfortable, watching her fall apart like this. But I was entranced to listen on.

"I wonder how many. Do you know? How many I've eaten?" I slowly shook my head no, restraining myself from saying 'a lot' or 'dozens' or even 'hundreds'. "I wonder what it's like. You know, to be eaten. Just walkin' along, going on with your day and BOOM! I've gotcha and you're suddenly flying through the air and trapped in my mouth. And you're so scared because you're not sure what's happening, and I'm just smiling and laughing because that's what I do for fun is make people scared and dead. Do you think it hurts when I bite them open, do you think that's a painful death? I've got an idea, go find that guy that did this to me and give him another girl to make huge, but make her soooo huge, huger than me, and then have her eat me. Then I'd know and I could be dead." Rising from her back she sat upright, sticking her legs out and supporting herself with her hands.

"Do you think I even can die? Like, maybe I'm invincible now. I'm talking to you right now, Dustin, when you're the size of my pinky toe, and not even, and I'm wishing for death, and I give it out and take it in like free candy, so I wouldn't doubt it. Then what? Do I just eat forever? Eat until there's nothing left to be eaten? There isn't an unlimited supply of people, especially when I keep eatin' 'em, and look at all this crap!" she laughed, swiping her hand across the bottom of her foot, dripping in a red sludge. "Look at all this crap! Squished, squished, squished!" she chanted on and on, louder and louder, shaking her hand in a wild craze and sending the remains all over, some onto her body, some into the grass. It took a few seconds for her to calm down, now bits of the blood all over her.

"They're all squished! I stepped on them! Did you know the other Jessica wants to do that more often? Can you believe that? She only managed to convince me to eat them so I wouldn't starve, but what do I get outta stepping on them? This crap! That's all I get!" Her hand shot to her stomach, to a patch of red, and smeared it across her lower abdomen, staining the bottom of her breasts. "Have you ever stepped on a bug, Dustin?" she asked me after a few moments.

I shrugged my shoulders, at a loss, but she kept staring at me, waiting for an answer, so I gave her what I could.

"Probably--"

"Barefoot? Ever done it barefoot?"

"...no..."              

As if her feet knew they were being discussed, they began to twitch, her toes wiggling and her soles twisting. She leaned back a bit, as if losing control, and they were looming closer and closer, until I had to back up for fear of joining their mess.

"It's such a strange feeling, Dustin. I could feel them burst under me. Little grapes, pop pop pop. And that's it, they're gone. They cease to exist because I felt like putting my foot there. She loves it. She loves all of it. Be careful, she might wanna squish you soon," she said with a sly giggle, pointing at me and paling me in an instant. "She told me she wants to try using her toes. Catch you between them and just slowly curl--"

"Stop, please! I get what you're saying!" She grinned and pulled her legs back, running her fingers through her toes.

"Now I'm crazy and wanna try it. But not on you. Know anyone who wants to die? I'd be glad to help."

"Jessica, you know I can't--"

"Never mind, I just wanna try something," she said, plucking me between her fingers before I even knew what was happening.

"NO, JESSICA, NO! THINK ABOUT THIS!"

"I'm not gonna squish ya, I just wanna feel ya in there," she said, tucking me between her big and second toe. I tried to squirm to the side but the walls of toes moved with me and kept me trapped. I began to panic, trying to push out or pull in, anything to escape. All the while Jessica was laughing to near deliria.

"It tickles!" she managed to squeeze through her laughs, falling on her back and bringing her legs up with her. My stomach felt inside out as I was swung a few hundred feet up, but she still managed to keep her grip on me. I looked down at her laughing face until she noticed me, opening her mouth and making extended 'aaaahhh' noises.

"JESSICA!" I screamed, but she probably couldn't hear me.

"In the toes, in the mouth... that could be fun to try next time. I'll start catching 'em with my feet, they'll never expect it. I can squish and eat at the same time!" She let out her last laugh and wiped away her mirthful tears, only to be replaced by ones of sadness.

"Oh, Dustin, oh Dustin!" she wailed, pulling me down and curling into a ball around me. "I'm so sorry, Dustin! I know I sound like a total lunatic but you gotta listen to me! I don't know how much time I have left, she's taking over me! I don't know if I'll ever see you again... but you have to promise me that you won't let her hurt anyone else. It's too late to save me, but you gotta stop her, Dustin. You have to..."

She couldn't continue, her tears drowning her voice out. I was thrown off by the genuity of her sadness; she had cried so many times before but now I could feel the anguish, I could hear the despair. Me and Micheal had planned on killing Jessica, but I saw part of her was already dying in front of me.

I held my pinky finger up to her gargantuan lips and she miraculously noticed my touch.

"Shhh," I calmed her. "I pinky promise, Jessica. I'll make this better." I found myself tearing up; why would I cry for her? For this monster? These lips have had countless lives pass through them, and I was comforting them? I saw now that she was not the monster, the monster was something deep inside of all of us. It was a hunger for power, a power impossible to exert. Except for Jessica. Her mysterious circumstance granted her that horrible wish, and she fell prey to its tempting. She already had been eaten; by herself, by that human desire. It felt like I was at a funeral, watching Jessica pass.

She continued to cry as she leaned forward ever so slightly and kissed me, her lips nearly enveloping me in their embrace.

"I love you, Dustin," she said, and she cried her eyes out and fell asleep.

"Goodbye, Jessica," I whispered, kissing her finger and gently unraveling myself from it, climbing out of her. But I wasn't leaving. No, I still had work to do. I made a promise with my girlfriend, and I intend to stick with it.

But it would be hard for the both of us.

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"What do you need from me, Commander, I thought I had obligations to fulfill," I spat at him across the table, with as much of an attitude as I could. It didn't please him.

"I'm putting a deadline on this. We can't wait around any longer. Tomorrow at noon we are firing the missile at her, regardless of her location."

Ah, shit. I should have seen this coming. I just told Dustin to be careful of this.

"Sir, me and Dustin are going to be directing her into the Hudson by the New Jersey border. If you just give us the time to bring her there, it'll be open space with no chance of--"

"I don't care anymore, Micheal. We've lost too many good men and women. This is a national disaster and we cannot afford to let it linger. Killing Jessica is so critically important to the wellbeing of this planet, never mind this nation! If that requires a few extra causalities, so be it. It's them or it's everyone, Micheal. It's them or it's your wife and boy."

"You keep them the hell out of this!" I snapped.

"Don't make me the bad guy here, Micheal, I'm just being realistic! It will happen soon if we don't act. She keeps going North like she's been doing she'll get to Bridgeport eventually."

"SHUT UP!" I couldn't stand to hear him say these things, to even suggest my family might be in danger. I couldn't deny it however; New York was not too far off from Bridgeport, especially for Jessica.

"Originally we were going to plan on a traditional air drop for the bomb, but with Jessica's immense size and relatively high speed, we decided that was simply not efficient enough. We've managed to get our hands on one of these," he gestured behind him as a team of men wheeled in a cart holding a black missile. It looked rather small head on, but as the cart turned I could see just how massive it was.

"This is the Diamondback," the Commander explained. "It's a nuclear alternative to the heat-seeking AIM-9 Sidewinder missile. It was an idea brought up in the fifties but back then we just didn't have a use for it. Times sure have changed, huh?" he asked with an awkward little laugh before continuing. "We've already done some radar scans and Jessica's heat signature is more than easily traceable. We can load it into a fighter jet and off she'll go." He rose his hand and the men took off with the Diamondback, then swiveled in his chair to face me.

"Tell Dustin about this. Pull him out if you want. But if this little rampage of hers is because of their high-school drama break-up, I think he should get blown to bits with her."

A light bulb went off in my head: that wasn't the reason, she didn't know about Melissa. Jessica wasn't that simple of a puzzle to put together.

"Dustin's not the cause of this," I piped up. "Yeah, he's stupid, but Jessica still treats him like a boyfriend, even now. I've seen it with my own eyes, when you sent me. She was trying to cuddle with the guy."

"Look, I don't care. She could be the nicest person in the world, she could be the most caring and loving person I'd ever seen, she could be the goddamn President of the United States, but she's eating American people and having a damn good time doing it, and I'm gonna blow her to hell for it. Anything else I need to explain to you?"

"No, sir. Down with Jessica," I rallied mockingly. He was fed up of me and I was dismissed. As I left the base I dialed Dustin's number, and he picked up again. I must have been a master of good timing.

"Hey, Dustin, it's me. Bit of a situation, I just got back with the Commander and they're firing a heat-seeking nuke at her tomorrow at noon whether or not she's in the Hudson, sooo--"

"Of course they are. Of course, of course," he droned on, his unsurprised tone hiding what I knew to be cold fear.

"What are you thinking of doing next, hot shot?" I got into my car and started it, listening to the engine drum to life.

"She just spilled everything out to me... she sounds seriously sorry about all of this, and not like in a boyfriend-girlfriend way but in a real way. She refers to herself as 'she' like... like it's something else and it is, Micheal, I know that now."

"That's some hippie shit, Dustin."

"No, I'm serious. Jessica wasn't a bad person, she would never dream of anything like this. She just lost control to her more... savage side, I guess. I don't think that's too abnormal."

"No, totally," I scoffed, rolling my eyes. "Every night I think, 'you know what, if I were six hundred feet tall, I'd eat everyone. But I'm not, so it's okay to consider it. Oh, look, I am that big now, guess that's it, then'."

"You're not getting it."

"Clearly."

"I'll handle this, I'll handle this," and he hung up. Well wasn't that just a fine dandy goodbye. I guess I was done with Jessica, though. Kind of sad, actually. It was the loss of ultimately the most exciting and mysterious cryptid I had ever hunted. The thrill of the chase had almost faded out of me if not for her. On the other hand I was glad. I could finally see Jared and Carrie face-to-face and tell them the good news. We could sleep easy soon.

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I stretched out my arms over my head and stood in the sunshine. What time was it? Had I slept in to the midday? I didn't think last night took that much outta me. A grin crept across my lips as I recalled the events of the previous night. I was so glad I had finally let go. No more worries, no more battles with myself, just good, hearty fun.

What was it I wanted to do today...? Oh, right, practice the squishing. People could be so much more than food, they could be playthings too. I went through the motions of different crushing maneuvers with my foot on invisible crowds: a direct strike with the ball of my foot, followed with a violent twist. A ruthless stomp with the full-length of my foot. Grinding them down under my heel, then crashing down with the sole. More than anything I wanted to get my toes involved; they were so ticklish that the wiggly little people were bound to make their use as weapons of mass destruction no less than great.

I noticed Dustin hadn't tried to catch my attention yet. Or perhaps he had and I didn't notice. My breath stopped for a moment, but there was no little stain; I didn't get him in my test runs.

"Dustin?" I called out, looking over the trees for my diminutive boyfriend. "Dustin where are you?" From a patch of the largest trees I saw him appear, so I went down to my stomach, swinging my legs behind me.

"Sleep well, Dustin?"

"Yeah... yeah, I did, thanks for asking," he said slowly.

"Are you hungry? What do you say we hit the town for lunch?"

"Jessica... there's something we need to talk about," he said seriously. I frowned a bit; what did he have to be serious about? This was all just good fun, I didn't want to be serious. That was boring.

"Why so serious?" I smiled, hoping he would play along.

"It's a serious subject." He didn't.

"...oh," I said, holding my chin in my hands, resting on my elbows. "Well what's up?"

"Jessica, I don't know what... mental state you're in right now, but you've been through a lot since this happened to you, and before... before this morning I promised you I would do something. You've been acting differently, and I think what you need to bring you back is a little reality. And sometimes, reality can be painful."

"What are you talking about?" I was getting nervous, scared even. Dustin was never one to be dramatic.

"Jessica... I... I cheated on you."

I blinked. Then I blinked again. Only after the third blink did I feel my eyes watering, my mouth creaking open like a loose door. Dustin loved me, didn't he?

"You're... you're lying!" I declared loudly but not angrily. Really I wasn't angry, I was just confused to the point of sadness, sad to the point of confusion.

"I wish I were," he said in a near whisper. "I wish I were." I could see him try to retreat in himself, scared of what I would do. But I didn't want to eat him. I didn't want to step on him. I didn't want to do anything with him. I wanted to run away.

So I did. If Dustin didn't love me, who did? I never even asked him who he had picked over me, but it didn't matter. No one could love me anyway, I must have just stumbled across Dustin and intimidated him too much to try and escape me. Who could escape me?

I felt like utter shit, and I only knew one way to make myself feel better. I stormed into a city nearby and soaked in the screams of the crowd I drew. I expected myself to disregard them, but they ran through me completely.

No matter, I was probably still just fussing over Dustin. Here's a little pick-me up, I thought to myself, bending down and picking up a little man. I stuck his legs into my mouth and he kicked frantically, beating my tongue horribly. Slowly and gradually I sucked him in deeper and deeper, but it just became worse and worse. Why would Dustin do that to me? With what I must have done to him, it was nothing. I thought over what I had done as the man was inside me... and I saw it.

I drooled the man back up and placed him on the ground as if nothing had ever happened. I couldn't do it. Dustin's betrayal had changed something inside of me, made me more like the little people.

It was all part of his act, I convinced myself. Of course he wants me to sympathize with them, he's one of them, he doesn't want me to take my place of power. I'd show them just how powerful I was. The ultimate act of insignificant killing: I'd step on them. Just when the people thought I was to spare them, my foot was overhead. I was ready to try each and every one of my squish tactics on these little bugs. But just before my foot came down, I heard it again.

The screaming. But more intense, more shrill, the scream of someone who knows their death is imminent. God, these aren't bugs, these are people. Had I really been imagining different methods to murder, and in fun? I felt a bit embarrassed and ridiculous holding my foot up like that and pulled it back. What kind of sick fuck crushed living things for the hell of it?

So I had changed. Was this normal, to feel empathy to things less powerful than you, smaller than you? I stood motionless as everyone ran away. I had done this for so long... and only now I saw the truth?

"I'm sorry, okay?!" I called out, so everyone could hear. Of course it didn't slow their fleeing haste, but I kept crying it out. "I'm sorry!" I couldn't believe I was crying over them, but at the same time it felt right. All along, I had been one of them, in a way. And you don't eat and kill your own.

I sat by the bay for hours, thinking about my life. I looked out to the water and saw open horizon, and considered running headlong into it. Maybe I could just keep running and running through that water. Come back when this craziness had passed and maybe be accepted by the tiny people. Would they eventually come to forgive my misdoings? Would I?

The sun was smothered by dark clouds and they opened into rain. Even I was no match for the clouds, and I was still subject for their heavy tears. I discovered I had been crying all this time, but quietly, not hysterically. I tried to let the rain cleanse over me, let me begin anew, wash away the blood on me. No longer did I want anything to do with blood. Too much came along with it: a sticky regret, a soaking fear, a looming death. I threw my head back and opened my mouth as if it could purify my monstrous appetite. If never eating people again meant never eating again... I would be content to die. My conversion was near religious: in minutes I had gone from a rampaging goddess to a broodingly careful deity.

But that had to go too. Nothing made me holy at all. If I wanted people to even like me, no, tolerate me would be a better way to put it, I needed to change. Worship was a decision, a very deliberately thought out one. Those who demand it... would probably never get it. Being worshipped sounded like too much. It's a lot to expect from anyone: total and complete dedication. I just hoped they could like me one day as a person, but anyone who wanted to like me as a goddess could. I couldn't stop them. That was fair.

Police sirens suddenly blared in the distance. What had I done now? I stood up and saw they weren't headed in my direction at all, they were flocking around a tunnel of some sort. Curious, I snuck around the city and found out what was wrong for myself.

The tunnel had caved in, blocking it off to the road. A somewhat large crowd had gathered there; maybe they had already forgotten me, or just thought I was of no harm. No, they were probably just betting on their luck. As soon as I appeared they screamed and ran. I've made too much of an image of myself to expect any less, I suppose. Even then, I'm a giant naked woman. Pretty freaky.

No longer having to worry about any accidents, I went down to my hands and knees and took a closer look at the rubble avalanche. Several chunks of stone and maybe concrete, but nothing I couldn't handle. I carefully pulled them away, chunk by chunk, starting from the top, and set them aside. Only in five minutes time was the road cleared. I stood up and admired my work, but the drivers who had been trapped inside were a bit reluctant to show themselves while I was around, so I took the mess I had cleaned and dropped it into the water back at the bay.

I looked up at the sky again and it was still down pouring. I heard a smack of thunder and saw a lightning bolt in the distance. Maybe this would be it after all. I could end on a good note. Slowly I walked further into the water, still staring at the clouds, holding out my arms to embrace them. If I was good enough, they might reward me.

If not, I'll keep trying to please them.