Alex looked at the broken clock on the wall. “Ah, 2:39, like always. Time to check up on Liz. She should’ve been there by now…” He picked up his bulky phone, the kind that were made and left for dead in the 80’s, and dialed her number. “I don’t know what I was thinking sending her as a stooge to do field work…”

There was a click and Liz’s undeniable shriek of a voice blared through the phone. “Agent Liz here! What’s the sitch?”

“…I think you’re taking this ‘cheerleader saving the world thing’ a bit too seriously.”

“Shut up, Wade. What do you do? Sit behind a computer in your mommy’s bedroom and bark orders at me. I’m on the field, I’m taking the risks, and we’ll do things my way or the highway!”

Alex rubbed his forehead in frustration. “Oh, for the love of… Do you even remember what you were supposed to do?”

“Of course I remember! I’m the teenage supermodel, remember?”

“Superhero. You’re the teenager superhero.” Then he added, under his breath, “You stupid twit.”

“Well, a superhero needs to look her best. I bought a couple of extra cheerleading uniforms at the mall… There’s this really pretty blue one with white stripes, but I think I look better in red. Should I come back there and show you? Maybe you could help me decide.”

“You went shopping at the fuckin’ mall!?” Alex roared into the receiver. “You retard! That’s about ten miles out of your way!”

“Oh, Alex, the mall is never out of my way.”

“Please say you’re kidding… Please tell to me that you’re not really that stupid…”

Liz sighed playfully. “Of course not, Alex. I’m on my way to the plant right now in my Lamborghini. Got the top down, wind in my face, and—oops! Almost hit a squirrel. They should learn to stay on their own side of the sidewalk. You know, it’s such a beautiful day outside! Are you sure you don’t want me to drive to the Crystal Light plant in Florida? I don’t mind the gas money. My daddy’s rich, you know. Well, not that you’d know anything about rich, or having a dad, but I guess you’ve heard what it’s like. I wouldn’t know what it’s like being poor, though. I guess I’d have to walk to get the mail in the morning. That’d be awful. My driveway is like a mile long. Did I ever tell you…”

Alex had stopped listening a long time ago. “You brought the Lamborghini… Good job being inconspicuous, Liz.”

“You don’t need to be so sarcastic, Alex. I’m not that suspicious. See, I decided to drive the blue one because the red one stands out too much—oh, and because blue complements my hair. Don’t you think?”

“…Wait. Liz, it’s illegal to talk on a cell phone while driving.”

Suddenly, sirens were heard in the background.

“Uh, oh!” Liz cried. “Captain, I got a boogie on my behind!”

“…That’s ‘bogey’, nimrod.”

“No, it’s not bogus, Alex! I have to run. I’ll call you when I get to the plant! This is Agent Liz, signing off. Over!”

The phone clicked.

Alex stared at it. “…Well… Look at the time. 2:39. Time to give Cordelia a call and make sure she’s okay. And Andy too, I guess.” He dialed her number and listened to the phone ring once, twice, three times.

Around the twenty-sixth ring, she picked up.

“Cordelia, it’s me, Alex. I was just calling to see if you could make it to our meeting a littler earlier. Like now. I think we might have stumbled upon… Uh… … Is this a bad time? ... What are you two doing? … … … … … … Good God that I still don’t believe in, that's disgusting. And yet strangely arousing. … … I don't care... … No, don't put him on, don't put him—hi, Andy... … … Yes, I realize how stressful this must be on you... …. … … Uh-huh… … … Look, just shut up and tell Cordelia to bring you over here before I serve you in cocktail sauce. … … She already did? … … …  This is awkward. … Yes, okay. … … Just come over here. … … Sorry, bad choice of words. Just get over here.”

He hung up the phone. “…I’m going to go wash my hands. I suddenly feel very dirty.”

He stood up, walking over to the janitor’s sink, and turned on the brown water, rubbing his hands under the cool stream that trickled out. Then he splashed his face and let the water run down. “How ironic is this? Here I am, in possession of something I’ve been trying to create all my life—a substance with the power to shrink a human being. Why, then, am I seeking to destroy it?” Staring at himself in the busted mirror on the wall, twisted reflections in the serrated shards, he watched the drops of water skitter down his skin, lingering at his chin for a moment before they splashed into the grimy sink below.

“A fantasy can become so deadly if brought into a world it wasn’t meant for,” he tried to tell himself. “Some things should only exist in the subconscious… Our world cannot take these idealistic fancies, a fairy utopia in a world of rationality. What kind of nightmare would we unleash? Break the gates to hell, open Pandora’s box, and watch the darkness fall upon us. These crystallites could be our untimely end. They must be destroyed.”

It was then that Alex noticed his phone ringing. He wasn’t sure for how long, so he quickly dried his face off with a brown paper towel and picked up the receiver, pressing it to his ear. “Yeah?”

“It’s Agent Cheer,” the voice on the other end said.

“Hi, Liz.”

“Aw, how did you know it was me?”

“Maybe because you’re one of the only two girls in the world that actually asked for my phone number; the other which I just got done talking to and she was quite out of breath—whereas you, Miss, are as obnoxiously bubbly as ever. …Oh, and your whiny, stuck-up, nasally voice was a subtle clue.”

“Alex, can you believe I got another ticket? I just finished making room in the glove compartment too! Don’t they realize I’m too rich to pay for their silly rules?”

“So, you're going to continue blatantly disregarding the law and doing exactly what you did to get that ticket in the first place?”

“Pretty much… What’s ‘blatantly’ mean?”

“…It means to be rich,” he said. “Are you at the plant yet?”

“Aye-aye, captain! What do you need me to do?”

“Tell me what you see.”

“A bird, and there’s a car, and another bird…and another one… You should see this! Oh, and there’s some clouds and a tree, which I didn’t know grew in this city… Oh! And there’s me in the rear view mirror! Hi, me!”

“Liz!”

“What?”

“At the plant. What do you see at the plant?”

“Oh, um… I can’t see anything. There’s a bunch of yellow tape around it and cops walking around. And…they’re carrying out huge barrels of Crystal Light. I guess they’re really thirsty.”

Alex fell down onto his bucket seat. “Cops…? And they have the place barricaded off?” He thought for a moment, scratching his mullet. “Okay, change of plans. Liz, I want you to find the chief and pry him for all the information he has. You’re rich, so they won’t try to arrest you. And if they think you know too much…well, they won’t. Trust me.”

“But there are no Indians here… Just cops.”

“Do you see a cop with a beer gut and a huge mustache?”

“Three of them.”

“Which one has the shiniest badge?”

“That one.”

“Yeah, like I can see them… Okay, Liz, is he wearing mirror-lensed tear drop sunglasses?”

“Yeah.”

“He’s the one you want.”

“That’s a 1-4-1, good buddy!” she said.

“Over and out,” he replied, waiting for the click. “…Well, my IQ has dropped about 40 points.”