Hello everyone, Fiore here writing… Is this style of YouTubers still even popular? It's been so long since all I follow are Pulshare channels that I am very at a loss with all of this. All I remember before I left is that the Vtubers had managed to impose their style on twitch and that the civil war between made-up personalities and real streamers was at a standstill.
Pulshare is the social network equivalent to YouTube / Twitch fused with Netflix in Acheron in case you didn't know… and you may find it hard to believe but it is full of exactly the same terrestrial equivalents! It is surprising and disappointing at the same time that hundreds of species from different planets end up reaching the same conclusions and services ... and that these are mostly social networks. I guess it's inevitable, right? While we are talking about social species that seek to form communities such as the Akken, humans, Torih or many others, the final way to maintain these "communities" is always to take it to the digital / virtual sphere. As it is almost 00:30 and my brother still has not arrived, I am going to allow myself to expand a little more on this, okay?
We all have the immense size of the Akken in perspective, right? Well, in this "section" or community of the Milky Way they are the largest species there is, the rest having sizes that vary between the Torih with 20 feet in height to the Gneshes with 2 feet and a half, the civilization at the minimum required of our space community. (The minimum point of civilization is the point where it is legal to establish contact with them, placing themselves in the creation of the digital network up to a minimum speed and expansion of 95% of the planet where they live)
I mention the size so that you understand well what type of content is popular in Acheron in the last 2 decades (4 Earth decades counting the calendar, I repeat that in perspective both measures of time indicate the same).
For Akken, who lives on the roof of plenitude, the highest possible peak at the level of social, political and economic well-being, fashion has long been to interview people of other species, visit other planets and make videos comparing stories ... and when I say fashion I mean sensation on a planetary level. If you enter the main page of Pulshare (I think that from earth you cannot yet, or at least I cannot connect to the Acheron cybernet) and you look for the last 50 holographic or digital videos most viewed 40 will have beings of other races or other planets on the cover, of those 40 almost certainly 30 or more are about humans.
As you can all deduce being one of the first humans in Acheron, once you see 5 videos of Akken marveling at humans or the Earth begins to bore, I am not saying 20 years. I've been in so many such videos and by now not even playing with Vell to drink every time I stutter is fun. (I don't know why but when I have to speak in front of a digital camera I am unable not to stutter)
And just by showing off as a wife once again, Vell always manages to win. I know that our scales are very different but no matter how much I try to endure, I am unable not to get drunk sooner. And I extend this to my Akken family side, no one can drink as much alcohol as my beloved giantess.
There was a time a few years ago when it became fashionable among the personalities (Emitters is the equivalent of Youtuber) of Pulshare to buy everyday human objects and record themselves trying to use them, playing with them or seeing how their human friends used them ...
It was a strange time, definitely. My sister-in-law bought a fucking Ferrari to watch me use it and learn how the engine works… and as you can imagine it was fucking uncomfortable because they made me feel like I was some kind of laboratory mouse operating a lever! Akken are great and super perceptive except when something arouses their mechanical curiosity and fails to satisfy it by their own hand, at that moment it is as if their minds are blocked and they cannot notice the tension in the environment.
I don't think it's worth dwelling on my past humiliations too much, so I'm going to settle that part by saying that if you ever find yourself in the same situation you should be the first to offer the demo. If there's one thing Akken stands out for, it's being tireless.
Another thing that I recommend- Wait, I hear footsteps and I know very well who is the only idiot I know who would come to the river with dress shoes. Increasing the reception of the telephone...
Fiore: Good evening my brother! How beautiful is this full moon that bathes us, right? And what picturesque weather, only almost 40 degrees at midnight!
Albert: Cut that crap, little shit.
Fi: But why- But how dare you ask me to interrupt my dialogue, good sir! I am only trying to imitate the vocabulary and mannerisms of the upper class with whom you are now related, oh director of the best and one of the last libraries in the metropolitan area of r03;r03;Barcelona!
Alb: Do you know who you remind me of talking like that? To grandfather when he tried to call the royal family to congratulate them on the king's Christmas speech.
Fi: Right? I was thinking to myself ... to think that the crazy old man would be right and in the middle of the century we would still have to support royalty ... disgusting life.
Alb: Oh, do you include yourself in this? I didn't know you paid taxes to the Spanish hacienda since Acheron! Seeing you so empathetic with us earthlings makes me think that maybe Acheron is not ... how would I put it ... the best planet in the galaxy?
Fi: Now who's being ridiculous, huh? If you have something to say to me, say it to my face, if you have something to give me, tell me since I am thirsty from waiting for you here so much.
Alb: Look at you, so grown up and still capricious. I've tried going out earlier but you know, the kids have class tomorrow and we have homework to do; It's what it takes to have a normal life and not show up for the first time in two decades in the middle of the week.
Fi: A normal life, huh? I'm going to pass it on to you because I see that you have brought a 6-pack of cruzcampo and as a big, grown girl, now I drink a lot more. I guess I ruined my surprise by asking but curiosity kills me ... they managed to make it really taste like beer and not ... what was it?
Alb: Does it taste more like beer than before? Yes. Does it taste really good? Not at all, but it's our poison, you know.
Fi: In my defense, you are the ones who initiated me into alcohol with cruzcampo, it's your fault completely.
Alb: We were young, with no income beyond the weekly pay, and Cruzcampo was the only thing that grandfather drank and we could take from him from time to time. A toast?
Fi: Why?
Alb: I don't know, to have you here with us ... I've missed you.
Fi: And I to you…
Alb: Really? Because you don't have the slightest intention of coming home-
Fi: ALBERT! Leave it already! Why do you keep trying to put me in the face of chasing the love of my life ?!
Alb: That is unfair, Fiore! I have nothing against Vell and you know it perfectly! She is wonderful and I love her calls to ask me about literature… what she held in your face is that you left for half your life and now you come to kidnap us!
Fi: Oh, kidnap you ?! Wanting to protect my family from the inevitable by giving you a better life are they kidnapped ?!
Alb: Better life according to whom, eh ?! You are invalidating each achievement, each sacrifice, each challenge overcome that we have done here because according to you in Acheron we would be much better! You're not taking into account-
Fi: Are you going to continue like this for a long time? I'm opening another beer.
Alb: How ... How dare you? You have always been a selfish whore but this is a new level of baseness that I did not expect to see you reach! How can you even sleep at night knowing what you are doing ?!
Fi: Between the breasts of my gigantic wife. This is how I sleep ... except in the summer when I sleep on his stomach as long as he's not sweaty. Outrageous all you want, Albert ... be angry with me for thinking of you and not wanting to leave you behind ... You say that how I sleep at night ... What I wonder is how you sleep knowing that your whole family wants to move and that you want to tie him to a planet that is one more attack away from exploding into a third world war! And God knows that this war will have neither winners nor losers, this will be the last war! FALLOUT, ALBERT! THAT'S WHAT IS WAITING FOR YOU! AND NO FALLOUT 3, NEW VEGAS OR WHITE FRONT… NO! WE'RE TALKING ABOUT A FALLOUT 76 RELEASE LEVEL APOCALYPSE!
Alb: Who told you that, your giants from beyond the stars ?! Do you think I'm going to let a fetishist like you eat my brain with your unfounded theories ?!
(There was a 5 minute pause in the recording here, courtesy of my brother giving me one of the most angry punches I've ever had. The system is only audio recording so I'll summarize what happened right after: Sigh mine , Albert putting his hands to his mouth terrified, I sigh again as he lowered his head and I finished the bottle of beer in one gulp, the river water running and the mosquitoes beginning to approach following the light of my phone)
Alb: Fi … I… I… I'm sorry…
Fi: You don't feel it, Albert, I know that very well; It's not the first time I've seen you explode and lose your Mister Elegance mask. It's not the first punch you give me and I'm sure it won't be the last…
Alb: If you say it like that… you leave me like a horrible older brother… hehe…
Fi: You have never been a great older brother… nor a horrible one. I haven't been a model little sister either ... although I don't think I've been too bad either. We ended up fighting too many times, I think because of the 9-year-old difference between you and me ...
Alb: We touch because we both want to be right ... From the moment you start talking, the first thing you learned was to say "No" and "Mio."
Fi: Can you blame me for it? We were 5 brothers in 4 rooms! In most of my first memories I see you fighting over a toy, a place on the couch or the last pancake for Sunday breakfast…
Alb: Do you remember… Do you remember so much ?!
Fi: Not long ago actually. Akken has an absurdly high memory capacity ... and I suppose that means that I am less and less human than I am Akken.
Alb: Fi…
Fi: That was my decision, Albert… don't look at me like I'm sick. I love Janivell as much as I love you ... and for that love I decided to receive experimental treatment ... for that same love I want you to come to Acheron. I won't be able to protect you like Akken here on Earth, but I can use who I am now, who I have been and who I will be to give you a better life in Acheron, far from this dung heap that has become our world.
Alb: And how is that life better than the one we have here, Fi? I'm not being ironic or anything ... The least I can do is sit here and listen to your plans.
Fi: I do not recommend you to sit down, I discovered very late that the river has flooded all the earth around here and that under the dry surface there is only mud ...
Alb: Ah ...
Fi: Yep.
Alb: That explains why you've been sitting in the same position since I arrived…
Fi: If you need to sit down, take advantage of the fact that I'm sitting and leaning on my back. Don't worry about me, I'm a big strong girl!
Alb: You used that as an excuse for us to ride you when we went out to play ... good times.
Fi: Good times, no doubt. Will you listen to me? (Albert nodded very slowly, especially slowly to make sure to annoy me!)
Well, the first thing you have to know is that I have arranged for you and Lisa and her family 5 houses already paid for-
Alb: WITH WHAT MONEY HAVE YOU PAID IT ?!
Fi: That doesn't matter, don't interrupt! What I was saying is that I have already negotiated 5 chalet-type houses of 197 square meters with main and rear garden, 3 floors high, garage, basement, attic, heated pool-
Alb: WITH WHAT MONEY HAVE YOU PAID IT ?!
Fi: Albert, that doesn't matter! I am part of the neighborhood promoter, technically I am a consultant but I have helped a lot in the promotion for the land embassy. The houses are a gift to you if you decide to move, in case they do not go to a lottery for humans seeking asylum in Acheron.
Alb: Gift…? It is like 3 times our current house. Fi, this is… is… god, I don't know what to say! You can't drop a bomb like that and expect to receive it undeterred! It is too incredible a house and I sure cannot conceive of the Akken technology that they have equipped!
Fi: Right ?! It will take a bit of time for us to adapt, you and Dad especially with the technology there… but it's worth it, I assure you! You will live on the residential edge of the human district, just 40 minutes from our house. According to data to take into account, the Saemir human district is one of the most advanced in all of Acheron, having a size similar to that of Berlin and with a growing population and economy. And before you ask, as much as the human district is, the main streets have been designed so that the Akken can pass without causing problems for the human population.
Alb: That… that's great, more than I thought if I had to be honest. And the subject of school and my work? Have you… thought about that?
Fi: All covered, big brother! I have prepared the papers so that Mom and Dad receive their retirement pensions in Acheron with the bonuses that this entails, which translates into a 35% increase in their contributions. For you I have been to the largest library in the human district, New Alexandria for cliché as the name may be, and I have recommended you along with Vell's mother so she would be happy to offer you a managerial position. For Anna, as I have said before, I have recommended her as a teacher at the academy where I give talks from time to time, and I can also tell you that Cris and Carla are pre-enrolled and admitted only in the absence of you moving there and signing the application.
Alb: You've thought of everything, huh?
Fi: All my life you and Anna, Alex and Aless, Eric, Dad and Mom, the grandparents… you have all taken care of me and guided me to where I am now. Your support was key for me to finish the translation, to pursue my dreams to work in the United Nations, to follow Vell ... The least I can do now that I am where I am is to try to give you a life as great as the one you have given me far away from this planet condemned to war-
Alb: You are mentioning that a lot and about Dad, I believe it is because he has always been a fan of conspiracies. From you… Fiore, is there something you are hiding from me with all this?
Fi: Just rumors, the Parliament of the Empire is somewhat restless with the latest movements of China and the United States in their lunar bases ... you know how this goes. For a race that hates dirty warfare as much as Akken, seeing their "human brothers" deny any attempt to help as they begin to stockpile supplies makes them quite nervous.
Alb: It is understandable, here we are also quite nervous. Fiore… what you've told me is wonderful and all that, and I can see all the effort you've put into it. Are you leaving me ... no matter how useless it may be, will I go talk to Ana tonight? Not much of a rush, is there? How long will you stay on Earth?
Fi: I have a maximum of one week, you have all the time you need. Albert, thank you… thank you for agreeing to think about it!
(Here I turned suddenly so as not to give him reaction time to avoid my hug, bear hug to be exact. And I admit that maybe I wiped the tears of emotion on his shirt, maybe a little snot too)
Alb: Quita, moron! It's my evening dress shirt!
Fi: Oh god, Albert ... only you would come well dressed to a river. Do we finish our beers and go home? I'm not going to sleep until the day after tomorrow, but you're tired, right?
Alb: It's true ... In Acheron the days and nights are longer ... I'm already getting nervous vertigo just thinking about it ...
Fi: Nervous, eh? I have the perfect solution for that!
Alb: Alcohol?
Fi: Always, god you are going to love Akkeron's alcohol! There is so much variety and even the recipes made with terrestrial products grown there taste different!
Alb: That, my dear sister, is one of the best arguments you have given me all tonight.
Acheron, here we go! Well… technically I still have to finalize details with Lisa but from our mini conversation at the bar I am sure that having your own restaurant is reason enough to move.
Acheron, here we go!