Servant(s): [Berserker] Mysterious Heroine X (Alter),  [Rider] Artoria Pendragon (Swimsuit Rider Alter), [Lancer] Artoria Pendragon (Alter)

Emiya Alter was an unlucky man. After the rough experiences he had in his life, he was jaded with fragmented memories and little mercy. With no ideals remaining, he had become an efficient mercenary-like antihero willing to take the cruelest path if it was the most efficient. Since his employment as a Servant in Chaldea, however, he felt his [Spirit Origin] wavering. The Master and the hecticness of all the happenings that came with saving the world with numerous fantastical servants did not agree with his corrupted self.

Never in a million eons would he have expected this type of change to his [Spirit Origin] however.

What sort of nonsense was this? He had been sitting on a sofa in one of Chaldea’s breakrooms performing maintenance on his guns when suddenly, he was hit by a painful headache. Though this was common for the tormented Archer, seeing his environment 100 times larger afterwards was not.

“Yet another ridiculous event, huh?” sneered the sulking Archer as he looked up and investigated his surroundings. Scoping out the situation and determining a plan of action was a necessity for the Alter. If he was currently the size of an ant, safety was a priority.

Especially someone who was still normal sized right next to him.

“Zzzzz… Zzzz…. I can… still eat...”

Mysterious Heroine X Alter was not affected by whatever he had been hit by it seemed. She had been napping after having an early morning snack beside him. He permitted her to join him on the couch because she was minding her own business and was quietest of the Artoria-faces, but now it was impossible to ignore her when she was the size of a mountain to him.

The black and gold clad Archer considered the best course of action. Going into hiding would be the safest option, but he snarled knowing it would not resolve his immediate troubles. He wasn’t going to just stand still and play the victim. The next option then, he realized, was to alert X Alter to his presence and avoid any mishaps.

How was he going to do that? Unfortunately for him, he found shooting at the girl’s stockings as she slept curled up like a newborn kitten was useless. Was it because of the thickness of the black thigh-highs or because of his reduced size? He couldn’t penetrate or even cut at the socks that house the girl’s legs and feet.

“Tch. Guess I can’t just wake her up from a safe distance,” he snarled. It was clear that the sounds he made were also reduced if the gunshots didn’t stir her either. He was going to have to find a better vantage point to get the girl’s attention. The only question was where.

“Zzzzz… Grk!”

Whoosh! Slam!

“What the-?! Urgk!”

To Emiya Alter’s dismay, the left foot he had been shooting at suddenly kicked, slamming right into him as the sleeping girl unconsciously stretched. A black wall rammed into his less than 2 cm tall body and shoved him across the sofa until he hit the armrest.

“Grk… Dammit… It reeks…,” the Archer class servant groaned as X Alter’s feet rubbed against the armrest and also his body. Her toes brushed against his face as her foot shifted, finally sliding off his body so that gravity could take him and allow him to fall back down. 

“Zzzzz… Two dozen more...”

“Looks like even that wasn’t a safe distance earlier.” The shrunken Archer groaned as he looked at X Alter. The girl was still sleeping happily. His plight went unknown to the girl.

There was no other choice then. The gunman prioritized making his way to the other side of the couch where X-Alter’s head was. To his dismay, what was a little more than a meter and a half had become over 150 m to him. It was a fair distance to travel so the trip actually necessitated his Servant’s agility.

Around X Alter’s leg, the man travelled. Past the length of the Berserker’s black stocking, he had to hop over the wrinkles in her thick, dark coat and then climb her scarf to get to his destination: Mysterious Heroine X Alter’s face.

More specifically, though, he was targeting her neck. His goal was not to shout into the girl’s ear. He was a realist, knowing full well the girl wouldn’t be able to hear him properly. However, that did not mean she wouldn’t be able to feel him.

“Sorry. Nothing personal,” the mercenary-type Counter Guardian readied his weapon. It was going to sting for the sleeping Alter. “I am the bone of my sword...”

Loading his gun with his Origin, the black and gold gunman’s plan was simple - to wake up the slumbering X Alter with a sharp pain in the neck. He was aware his strength as a Servant had weakened due to his new scale, but any defenses the Berserker had would be rendered helpless against his Noble Phantasm.

“So as I pray… Unlimited Lost Works [Infinite Sword Creation]!”

“Hyah!”

“Hmm…,” a smug expression formed on Emiya Alter for a moment but it was quickly removed when something came out of the corner of his eye. “Tch! Not goo-”

Slap!

The bullet had hit and erupted into a mass of swords which stabbed into X Alter, but never even made it past the surface of the girl’s skin. The mass of blades, however, did stick to her like a prickly burr - which still hurt and immediately irritated the Berserker.  The black and gold Alter’s idea had gotten her to wake up. Unfortunately, he had no time at all to make a break for safety as X Alter’s hand rapidly came in to deal with the bee-like sting.

“Ouch… Bug bite…,” the quiet Berserker mumbled as she scratched her neck with her hand. Emiya Alter was rubbed painfully against the Saberface’s sweating neck. He found his body pressed tightly against the girl’s skin which was hot underneath her scarf.

“Grk! Hey, Berserker, get y- Gah!” the miniscule man’s complaints went unnoticed as X-Alter’s scratching knocked him off her neck as she sat up, awake again. He found himself plummeting to the floor over a hundred meters below. “Uwoooah!”

Thud!

“Ooff… I should’ve seen that one coming…”

The Archer class-servant landed unceremoniously with a heavy impact, at least to him, onto the rug at the foot of the couch. X-Alter heard nothing from his screams to his fall as she looked around, still sleepy from having her nap interrupted.

She did, however, hear another voice.

“Something a matter, Fallen Knight?”

“Hmm…? Oh, good morning, person who looks like me… I think I got stung by a bug.”

Emiya Alter looked up. He recognized the voice of the new arrival, but the number of Servants with an identical voice and face made it difficult for him to place who the speaker was precisely. When he saw a pair of black Mary Janes and black stockings rising up above him.

“Dammit. This woman again...” the unlucky Counter Guardian groaned. There were more than two Alters in the room now.

Artoria Pendragon Alter, the Tyrant King of Britain, was a woman he couldn’t get used to being around. Something about her appearance irked the amnesiac due to his hazy memories, making it so that he couldn’t easily ignore any person with her face. Additionally, this particular iteration of King Arthur was known to be a heartless King of Knights with a taste for junk food and fast food. Considering what she was wearing at the moment though, calling her the King of Knights would earn a bit of her ire. King of Maids fit her more presently.

Maid Alter, a merciless maid clad in a swimsuit, was a stern individual who enjoyed the title of Tyrant Chief Maid. She had gotten a taste for guns, so she occasionally came to bother him regarding her firearms. Moreover, she always pestered him into eating out, using the excuse that they were fellow Alters to drag him by the arm to do whatever she wanted. At this scale, he wanted nothing to do with her.

“A bug bite? Go get yourself patched up in the infirmary then,” suggested the chief maid.  “Miss Irisviel should be on the rotation for today.”

“Ah! She usually has sweets to give out. I’ll go.”

Emiya Alter had no time to think as he failed to evade a stocking clad foot landing right on him.

Slam!

This was the second time the Archer couldn’t get out of the way. There was no escaping the shadow of X Alter’s foot in the milliseconds it took for it to hit the ground. He was knocked off his feet and pinned down under the Berserker’s full weight. The only thing he felt was saving his body from being smushed completely was the softness of the rug. Even being [Bulletproof] wouldn’t protect him for much longer. He was face down into the white rug fibers, ground further down painfully by the ball of X Alter’s foot. “Mgrrff!” 

“Thank you, Miss Maid,” the naive Berserker replied to the look-alike maid. “And please restock the daifuku on the table. They were delicious.”

He was only freed when X Alter lifted her foot again to put her boots back on. He thankfully was not going with it. The Berserker Class Servant, he realized, was leaving. Was that a good thing or a bad thing? He honestly wasn’t sure. He would have rather been able to get the Berserker’s attention over the Maid Rider’s, but as he had been squashed unaware by the girl for three instances now, his intuition told him to abandon the idea.

Shut!

“Restock the daifuku? Treating me nothing more than a common maid, I should be sure to lecture (read: Secace Morgan) her later that the only one above the Tyrant Chief Maid is Master…,” were the tyrant maid’s words after X Alter had left. She shook her head. “No, that child can be as naive as Lily… Maybe just a standard scolding...”

Now that she was alone, the breakroom was silent. While at the feet of the Rider-class servant, he looked up and saw her licking an ice pop that she held in one hand while a mop was in the other, swung over her shoulder like a delinquent carrying a pipe. This was a golden opportunity for Emiya Alter to get her attention. 

“I was going to drag that black-gold Alter to go eat, but if this room is filthy enough to attract insects, I suppose I should holy sword-class mop on them to clean this room.”

But Emiya Alter’s every instinct told him that he would be signing his death warrant. While X Alter was a safe giant for him to consider interacting with, Maid Alter was absolutely not.

“Tch. So cleaning? That’s not good,” he decided to get as far away from the Alter as possible. If she was going to clean the room, he’d end up being ‘cleaned’ and wiped away as well. He began to struggle out of the rug to hide under the shadow of the sofa.

But such was the struggle being clad in black and gold. He stood out on the white rug and white floor, so as long as Maid Alter’s attention was directed to the floor, she would easily spot him - which she did.

“Hm…? A bug?” he heard her giant girl speak. 

Whaaaaaam!

“Gwaaah!” Emiya Alter was crushed under the chief maid’s shoes. A heavy force pressed down on his body from all directions after the hard sole knocked down into the rug he was struggling to get out of. He felt his last defense disappear as the swimsuit Servant put her full body weight down on him and then began grinding her foot over his body.

“Dammit… This idiotic phenomenon…” grumbled the man as he struggled to endure the weight. He couldn’t suppress the damage for much longer.

“This must’ve been the insect that bit that girl, ”After what seemed like minutes but in actuality was only fifteen seconds, Maid Alter removed her foot. She was able to look down and see a miniscule black and gold figure contrasting with the rug. “Hm…? Isn’t that…?”

As he was just starting to get his breath back, the Tyrant Chief Maid dropped her mop and snatched the bug sized Emiya Alter up by pinching his body between her thumb and forefinger.

“Whoaaah!” the exhausted Archer wailed as he was brought over a hundred meters upwards in the span of a second. He was brought up to the golden eyes of the Maid King of Britain.

“You are… the black and gold Archer?” there was a slight tone of surprise in the stern maid’s voice.

To not only be found but also recognized properly despite his size had been his goal all along earlier. Was this a dose of good luck? No, Emiya Alter’s luck was E-rank. He did not see this as any blessing. This troublesome King of Knights had an excessive personality that he disliked working with. The look in her eyes while she held him in one hand while holding her ice pop in the other was not one of concern.

“Oh? So you’re in this kind of state today,” the chief maid spoke. Her mouth being right up in front of him, he choked on what he could recognize was the smell of artificial coconut flavoring. The maid seemed to have noticed his trouble though. “I had thought something strange was going on while wandering around this morning.”

“If you realized that, you can at least help a little, can’t you?” snarled the tiny Archer. Unfortunately, his voice only came across as unintelligible squeaks to the Pendragon girl. And she did not like the look on his face when he spoke to her.

“I can’t hear you very well at all, but I don’t think you should be giving me that sort of attitude, Archer in black,” frowned the King of Knights.

“What?” he shouted, projecting his guns in frustration. “That’s what you’re concerned with?! You can see what ridiculous incident this is! If you aren’t going to be of any help, just put me do-!”

Slam!

“Grk!”

Without any warning, the swimsuit maid’s pinky finger slammed down on him, silencing the Archer while still holding her frozen popsicle.

“I told you I couldn’t hear what you said,” Maid Alter shut him up. She disliked hearing his squeaking complaints and also found his use of [Projection] rude. “To think you’d raise a hand against a maid. Somebody is in the need for some [Coaching]. You wouldn’t want that to happen, would you?”

He absolutely did not, but again, Emiya Alter was not one to simply bend so easily when there were other options. He was not going to just bend over and take the giant girl’s punishment.

“How trivial… I’m not going to stick around for that,” he groaned. With his modified Kanshou and Bakuya in hand, Alter jabbed the bladed end of his guns into the girl’s pinky.

“Kuh!” the Alter girl was surprised to suddenly feel what was equivalent to a bug bite in her pinky. She loosened her grip on him but, to her dismay, her ice pop fell as well. “Uwah!”

“Hmph. Perfect,” the shrunken Servant took advantage of the opportunity and leapt off Artoria Alter’s palm. Due to his small stature, he landed a good second after the ice pop hit the floor. He could feel his knees buckle as his legs tried to absorb the impact of the fall. If he wasn’t a Servant, he would not have survived it. But now he was on the ground again next to the fallen frozen popsicle. “Heh. Now for a strategic retreat.”

But considering his size, he did not make it that far at all. Even though his destination underneath the breakroom couch was less than 50 cm away, what he expected to be a quick escape was far from one. Maid Alter had enough time to look down, take note of her fallen ice pop and his position, and scowl realizing she had lost both her snack and made a mess. This was all before he even made it to her right foot.

“You really enjoy digging your own grave, don’t you?” the tyrant maid bent down to pick up her ruined popsicle. She had half a mind to crush the bug sized Servant like an insect, but before she did any of that, the dirtied ice pop began to drip.

Plop!

“Uwrgh!” In an instant, a blob of melting slush fell atop of him, knocking Emiya Alter to the ground. 

The fact that he had been stopped by her melting popsicle caused Artoria Alter to raise an eyebrow. “Oh?” Her mouth curled upwards just slightly in what could just barely be considered an amused smile. “Well, that makes things much easier.”

She was so astonished by the ease of dealing with the stubborn Archer, she abandoned her idea of just stomping on him. The Swimsuit Servant then had a better idea. She poked the man with the melting popsicle. 

“Mgrk!” he grunted as the building sized pillar of ice slammed down on his buried body. He found himself freed when she lifted it up, but to his dismay, his body was stuck, clinging to the ice-cold coconut flavored slurry. “C-Cold...”

Emiya Alter found himself brought up to the enormous Servant’s face. Despite the coldness of the popsicle, he found sweat dripping down his face as Maid Alter’s piercing golden eyes glared through every part of him.

“Making me drop my ice pop… I hope you understand just what a mistake you’ve made,” she glowered. “To make a mess in my presence, I won’t be lenient on you just because you’ve gotten small.”

“She can’t be serious,” the captured Alter was in disbelief, but it was clear that the King of Maids was. 

“Your punishment will be to…” the maid started, but she couldn’t continue. In that instance, the shrunken Servant noticed her eyes change color - from golden yellow to a deep blue. “... To...”

“What the-?” he realized something was wrong, but he could do nothing but be swung about with the popsicle because his arms and legs were clinging to the sticky, sugary ice.

“Punishment… Buy...” Maid Alter clenched her head as though she was having a [Migraine] that was more typical of the Red Saber. “How about I… eat… you…?”

Some unpleasant words escaped the Swimsuit Servant’s lips as she struggled. 

“Yes… That’s an idea, isn’t it?” Maid Alter smirked. Her dark smile was wider than it had ever been to the point where it seemed unnatural. She was being influenced, he realized, and by something that was giving her a much harsher idea than the cruel King of Knights originally had. 

“Aah~!”

“Tch! Is she seriously eating me?” As the popsicle where he was on the top got closer to the girl’s open mouth, he ground his teeth. He saw the girl’s tongue which was stained white from the constant licking of the coconut flavored popsicle when she opened her mouth. A hot, moist breath bathed him, increasing the melting pace of his frozen bindings but not enough for him to break free. 

But before the popsicle entered the maid’s mouth, it was pulled back. He was rescued by the sudden jerking of Maid Alter’s arm.

His savior: Maid Alter herself. The Tyrant maid was using her opposite hand to hold the hand the popsicle was in back. She snarled as glare darkened with frustration.

“Something is trying to control me? Pathetic,” she fought the influence on her [Spirit Origin]. She had realized she was being affected by some outside force. Her will was strong enough to reject it. Emiya Alter could see her eyes change back from the blue of an ocean’s abyss to the gold of a lion. “As if a king such as myself will bend to someone’s will so easily. An adorable gothic lolita swimsuit maid will not bend to anyone’s whims, not even her Master’s!”

“Something’s strange about that philosophy...” the tiny Alter couldn’t stop himself from snarking. He was, however, relieved to not have to be licked up on the Rider’s dirtied popsicle. Despite the ridiculousness of her character, Artoria Pendragon (Maid Alter), the woman was impressive to be able to successfully resist whatever had been causing all of the trouble.

He wasn’t the only one who thought that.

“Impressive. It’s good you were able to resist it too then.”

Another familiar voice entered the exhausted Servant’s ears. Actually, it was again the same identical voice as Maid Alter. The number of servants with the same name and face as her was incredulous. Though he couldn’t see who it was precisely because he was stuck to the Rider class Servant’s popsicle, he was well aware that it was another Artoria Pendragon. The only question was which one. Each iteration of King Arthur had some distinguishing feature about them, so if he could see it, he’d be able to tell and plan his escape accordingly.

“Wooooah! Mffpt!”

Boing!

“Ah.”

The shrunken Servant immediately figured it out when the swimsuit-clad maid turned around because the popsicle and his body were given a full experience of the newcomer’s distinguishing features.

Not only were they distinguishing, Lancer Alter’s more prominent assets, her developed breasts, were exposed from many angles when she did not have her armor equipped. When Maid Alter had twirled around, her popsicle slammed into Lancer Alter’s left breast, slid underneath it while following its curve, and was stopped when it hit her right breast.

The shrunken Archer was pressed against the springy breast face first as the melted ice pop swept around it, staining it white with artificial coconut flavor and coloring. He was somewhat thankful to be able to feel the warmth from the King of Storms’ body sweep over him after having lost much of his core body heat, but being wedged between the womanly curves of the older Artoria Alter was still not a safe enough position for him to be happy.

“Mprk… Gah…,” he pulled his head away from the plush, flesh colored wall to take a breath. “You’ve got to be kidding me. Here of all places?”

Maid Alter removed her popsicle from between Lancer’s breasts. The Archer found himself no longer on the ice pop. He was pasted to Lancer’s exposed bosom. 

Lancer did not seem to mind though. When she glanced down at him, a smile formed on her face. At the same time, however, she moved to wipe the melted drippings of the popsicle off her body. In her efforts to do so, her breasts slammed together, smothering the shrunken Servant in between them.

“Lancer Alter? What are you doing here?” asked the Tyrant Chief Maid. She was still nursing her headache. She did not apologize for making a mess of her other self as she looked at the remains of her popsicle in disdain, but she had caught her other self’s words earlier. “You said ‘too’? Does that mean this happened to you as well?”

“Indeed,” nodded the holy spear wielder. “It appears not only the [males] in this facility have been affected, but the [females] as well. I’ve been tasked with going around alerting any stray Servants who are unaware of the incident and rescuing any victims.”

She had overcome the influence of whatever was affecting them and had come for his sake. The unlucky Archer couldn’t believe his ears, especially because her voice was slightly muffled while buried in her cleavage. When she finally decided to remove him from between her breasts, she plucked the man out between two fingers and rested him atop her palm.

“It looks like you’re safe, Sulking Gunman,” she recognized him as he was sprawled atop her palm. Her finger slowly approached him. She nuzzled it against his body, forcibly propping him up, but also giving him a helping hand to stand. A smile crossed her face. It seemed uncharacteristic, almost, but despite her dark appearance, Lancer Alter was a [Good] aligned Servant. “I’ll forgive you for that uncouth act of entering my personal space to that extent because it couldn’t be helped, but this would be the only time, understood?”

As safe as he could have been when dealing with three gigantic dark look-alikes… He scowled, but at the very least, he was no longer in any serious danger. From dealing with X Alter to Maid Alter and now to Lancer Alter, Emiya Alter was exhausted.

“So you’ve come here to deal with an incident,” Maid Alter’s hand met with her forehead as she sighed. “Another spirited event seems to be happening, huh? Then I take it you are more aware of what is going on than I am. I would’ve liked a bit more of a warning, but at least now we can go help Master deal with the culprit.”

“No,” Lancer Alter shook her head. “We can deal with Master and the mastermind later. For now, since we have another victim of this miniaturization, follow me.”

“Follow you?” the chief maid raised an eyebrow and crossed her arms.

Down in Lancer’s palm, Emiya Alter also wanted to know. He was able to stand again, but that did not matter to the giant women. There was no way for her to hear him, and at his size, he was the size of an insect, so despite her knowledge of who he was, Lancer did step over his pride by curling up her palm, completely cutting him out of the conversation. He was muffled in darkness as the older Artoria’s hand clenched, tightening around him.

“Mgrk!” he could hardly breathe and the space was becoming as hot as it was suffocating. Even though she closed her palm lightly, it was still tight to the shrunken Archer.

The conversation belonged only to the two Saber Faces, or rather, it only belonged to Lancer Alter, who was more aware of the situation than either of them. 

“Let’s head over to the recreation room. We have everything necessary in place over there.”