Cruise ships have among the best food and the worst conversation on Earth.
--Robert Heinlein, Job: A Comedy of Justice
Chris Archer settled into his seat at dinner, trying to decide whether he had made the right decision after all.
Yes, he had the plane ticket, and yes, had he stayed in Chicago, all he would've done is mope around, but he wasn't sure coming on his honeymoon alone was going to make it better.
She was supposed to be here, damn it, but she'd left him three days before the wedding. She thought she could "do better." She wasn't "in love with him." She had "been sleeping with the best man." So she called it off.
It wasn't easy for Chris, especially since the one friend he'd ordinarily turn to in this situation was currently sleeping with his ex-fiancee. So he took the Delta flight to Miami, and took the cruise that was supposed to follow what was supposed to be the happiest day of his life.
Yeah, it was probably a mistake.
"So who are you?"
The question broke his reverie. He probably shouldn't have come to formal dining, either, he thought. After all, he was alone, and he was going to have to talk to people. Besides, there were 98 honeymooning couples on board--well, 97 now--and he was bound to run into them.
He already had.
"I'm Scott, and this is my wife, Sarah," the man said, waving. Then, he grinned. "Feels weird to say that."
His wife, Sarah, smiled warmly. She was a pretty girl, about 21, with long, brown hair and a serious air. She reminded Chris of Julie. Unfortunately.
"I'm Chris," he said. "I'm here on my honeymoon--can't you tell?" Instantly, he regretted the sarcasm in his voice. It wasn't this nice couple's fault that Julie was a "slut."
The couple was silent for a brief moment, and they exchanged a quick glance, which didn't appear to be anything, but which held a deep meaning. "I take it things didn't work out?"
Chris smiled wanly at Sarah. "No. Unfortunately, she liked my friends better than me."
Sarah shook her head. "I'm so sorry, Chris. Are you here by yourself?"
"Yep."
"Then join us after dinner," said Scott. "We're going to the Casino for a little bit, and then in for the show."
"Oh--I couldn't," said Chris. "I mean, it's your honeymoon...."
"We're not lacking for the opportunity to copulate," smiled Sarah. Chris was taken aback by this quiet girl's directness. "But you look like a guy who needs a distraction. Come on, it'll be fun."
Chris sighed. Well, at least he was meeting people. "Okay, sounds good."
"Great!" said Scott. "Now, let's see what they've got to eat here. My friend Jake says cruise ships have the best food there is. Hopefully, he's right."
* * *
Cruise ships may not have the best food there is, but they have the most food there is. Scott, Sarah, and Chris waddled up to Deck 6, and grabbed a drink in the Casino bar.
"I just...I think it was a mistake for me to come here," said Chris.
"Don't like us, huh?"
"Actually, you two are really nice. But it's not helping to see two people so obviously in love. No offense."
Sarah showed mock outrage. "I'm wounded sir! Saying I love my husband. I just married him for the money."
"I don't have any money."
"Okay, I married him for the sex. Anyhow...we understand, Chris. You need something different. Something to take your mind off of Julie. I think...I think Scott and I have something to offer you."
Chris struggled to figure out what Sarah was driving at. She couldn't be offering....
"No, not that. Nor drugs, though this will give you a trip like you've never had. Scott, do you have the bracelet?"
"Right here." With that, Scott pulled from his pocket a silver bracelet, thin, but big enough to fit comfortably on a man's wrist.
"What--what is this?" asked Chris, as Scott handed him the jewelry.
"Magic," said Scott. "Believe me...in three days, you won't remember Julie."
"Chris, put the bracelet on."
Chris did, though he still wasn't sure what kind of game these two were playing.
"This is a charmed amulet. As long as you're wearing it, you'll have--well, some special abilities that will make you pretty much invulnerable. So don't take it off over the next four days."
"Why would I need to be invulnerable?"
"Because if you weren't, you'd be risking death. Now, what you should do is look for a woman you think is attractive. When you get near her, think the words, 'Okay. Start. Now.' Once you do, you'll be on the ride of your life."
"I'm confused...."
"It's a surprise," said Scott, getting up. "Enjoy it. We'll come find you before disembarkation. But...if you decide before that that you're not enjoying yourself, just think the words 'Okay. Stop. Finito.' Somehow, I don't think you will. Enjoy, Chris!"
Chris sat in the bar, fingering the bracelet, for some time. What the Hell was all this about? Find a woman, think three words, and what? She'll want him? It sounded ridiculous. But...well, it wouldn't hurt anything. And the two kids seemed pretty nice, and really, pretty sane.
He stood up, and started walking. Find an attractive woman. That shouldn't be hard on a cruise ship. He decided to head to Deck 10. There was a dance club there--bound to be a few hotties.
He saw the girls almost immediately. They were in their early twenties, one with brown hair in a short, butch haircut, the other with longer blonde hair with pink streaking. They were sitting at a table near the floor, making google eyes at each other. They were very much in love, obviously.
Two hot lesbians, thought Chris. Now that would be fun--if there was anything to this whole thing. Guess I'll find out. Okay. Start. Now.
He felt a hum in his brain that picked up volume until it reached a screaming pitch. He wanted to tear at his ears, but he knew somehow that the sound was originating in his brain. It grew louder, and louder, and just as it reached its apex, it stopped.
And so did everything else.
Chris tried to move, but found himself rooted in place. He was staring at the two girls, who were frozen in mid-touch. "CHOOSE YOUR FORM," said a voice from everywhere.
"What?" said Chris, if his lips would move. "What do you mean?"
"CHOOSE YOUR FORM. ITEM/SIZE/NEW OBJECT."
"My form?" he said.
"ACCESSING HELP."
There was a pause, and then a person appeared in front of Chris. Actually, not a person, but a hologram. It was a woman in her late twenties, wearing a smart, bohemian blouse and black slacks. She smiled, and said, "Welcome to the Help Program for this prototype Bracelet of Alteration. We at GTS Enterprises hope you enjoy this item. You have been selected as a test user. Please, when you have completed your test run, tell your GTS Representative what you liked about the product.
"The Bracelet of Alteration allows you, the user, to alter your size and shape at will. You can also merge with existing objects, and even merge passively with animate objects. When you want to move to a new form, simply think 'Now. Form Change.' The form change prompt will allow you to change. Remember: at present, there is a two hour delay on changes in your form. So once you've made a change, you're locked in for at least two hours.
"This concludes the Help for the Bracelet of Alteration. From all of us at GTS Enterprises, thank you for your continued support."
"CHOOSE YOUR FORM. ITEM/SIZE/NEW OBJECT."
Chris stared. He could be anything?!? He wondered what he could be that would allow him to be with these two young women. What he wouldn't give to just watch them tonight, to be ant-sized, unnoticed....
"FORM CHANGE ACCEPTED. CHOOSE LOCATION."
In his reverie, he barely heard the location prompt. Instead, he mulled about hanging out by the pussy of the blonde as her partner went down on her....
"LOCATION ACCEPTED. TRANSPORT TO NEW AREA IN 3...2...1...."
Suddenly, the world started up again, and Chris was sliding through an outcropping of bizarre grasses, straight down into oblivion. He screamed, and grabbed at the vines around him, finally coming to rest in a tangle of branches as thick as his body.
"What the Hell--" he said, as the world shifted again. There was a strange, familiar odor in the air. His manhood instantly sprung to life in recognition of the scent, and he struggled to right himself.
"Oh my God," he said, half-amazed. He was right where he asked to be--ant-sized, by the pussy of the blonde. Thank god he hadn't thought "fly on the wall." All things considered, he didn't want to be an insect.
The world continually shifted, as the blonde subconsciously moved her womanhood in anticipation of events to come. Chris did his best to secure himself, when suddenly there was a movement that dwarfed all others--the woman was rising.
As they came out of the bar, light began to flood in. It was hard for Chris to figure out where it came from, until he saw the world below was brighter. The woman was wearing see-through panties, and he could see straight through what looked like a soccer net, down her long lovely legs to the floor below. At his size, it seemed like almost half a mile--he had to be less than a tenth of an inch tall. He swallowed hard, and hoped Sarah had been telling the truth about the invulnerability part.
The three stopped, and there was the sound of an opening door. After a few moments, the air grew sweeter, and thicker, and suddenly, the skirt which blocked his view was gone, and quickly the face of the butch girl appeared.
"OHHH, KYMBERLIE...WHAT A GREAT WEDDING PRESENT!" said the woman who was apparently Kymberlie's wife. Chris was too busy studying the beautiful, boyish face of the woman to worry about the women's wedding vows. And quickly, the panties themselves were gone, and the woman was easing her bride down onto the bed.
She pulled herself up her lover, and for a few moments, Chris' sky was dominated by the totally shaved vagina of the Bride of Kymberlie. A few drops of the woman's ardor fell like rain onto Kym's veldt. The sky slowly slid by...the navel of the woman was now above him, puncutating a well-toned abdomen...now, slowly, small, pert breasts dangled just a few yards above him...and now a chin...and now...a tongue....
It came up from below him and engulfed his world. He couldn't fight it. Instead, he was pushed along, and pulled back, smack into a soft, velvety lip. He stuck to the lip for a moment, and then was back off, on the tip of the tongue as it slid back out, toward an enormous, throbbing bulb....
His clothes were ripped off him by the tongue, as it pushed gently against the clit of her partner. He was pushed indelicatley but urgently into the soft, wet, moist button, and then, the lips pushed down around him, and the suction began.
He was pulled into the mouth, an enormous wind tunnel, and then bounced back down the tongue toward the button. Then back up, in another suction, then back down...back and forth, never quite being sucked in, never quite being dropped out, as the sultry, thick air swirled around him. Suddenly, the whole world moved in response to the first spasms of orgasm. He was pressed hard by the tongue into the button of Kymberlie, as her knees buckled and her eyes went back. He found himself coming at the same moment, amazed at the strange threesome he was a part of.
"OH, ANGIE...NOW THAT WAS A GREAT WEDDING PRESENT...."
He stuck to Angie's tongue as she licked her way upward, depositing him somewhere between the ample bosoms of Kymberlie. The two cuddled, with breasts interlocking and overlapping. Chris was caught somewhere between Kym's left breast and Angie's right. He didn't mind at all.
* * *
It was a lot of fun being a part of the action, and it was just as fun watching. But it was a little disappointing, a couple hours later, when the girls started to get dressed and get ready to go out and catch the late show. Then, suddenly, as Angie searched for a bra, inspiration struck.
Now. Form Change.
"CHOOSE YOUR FORM."
The world had stopped again. "A bra, same size and style as another one in that drawer, but one that is in Angie's hand."
"FORM AND LOCATION ACCEPTED. TRANSPORT TO NEW AREA IN 3...2...1...."
Suddenly, the world was in motion again. Chris tried to move, but found himself unable to. He could see all around him, though, and he could feel Angie's fingers lifting him upward. She pulled him around her, and her breats nestled gently against him. This was the life. He didn't even mind as she pulled a t-shirt on over him, blocking the view. This would do nicely for the next couple hours. He'd see where things went from here.