“Here’s the MR scan showing the location of the tumor.” Dr. Kale pointed to a black-and-white image showing a cross section of Luna’s brain. The film hung from a backlit panel on the wall of her office. “It’s in the thalamic region, and therefore inoperable without considerable risk to the patient.”

“What about chemotherapy?” I asked the question for the second time. The tears had long since dried on my face. I couldn’t cry anymore, and from the looks of it, neither could Regan. We both hadn’t stopped since the doctor informed us of the diagnosis ten minutes ago.

“As I’ve explained, the tumor is slow growing.” Her tone revealed her impatience. “It won’t respond to chemotherapy. Radiation may be effective, but it has more risks surgery.”

“How much time do we have?” Regan asked. Thankfully, she carried me so that I could look Dr. Kale in the face. Addison stood to the side; though she hadn’t wept, her anguished expression betrayed her concern.

“Luna has, at most, a couple of months to live. Her short-term memory will continue to deteriorate, impeding her ability to perform the simplest of tasks. Eventually, she’ll be unable to maintain conversation for more than a few seconds.”

“And if we convince her?” Regan asked.

“Again, I’m confident Ascension would cure her.” Dr. Kale walked to the examination table and placed her hand on Luna’s forehead. My wife slept, peacefully, her chest rising and falling in under her hospital gown. “However, she refuses to Ascend. She became so agitated with the recommendation, we had to sedate her. No Healer will treat her if she’s not a willing participant.

“I tried to explain Ascension wouldn’t change her personality, but she wouldn’t believe me. Even more than that, she feared her husband would stop loving her.” Dr. Kale sent me an accusatory look.

“I’ll never stop loving her.” Initially, the suggestion of Ascension had made my heart stop. It was a one-way street. Once Ascended, there was no going back, and all offspring would inherit the virus.

“Ash, as her husband, you should be the one to act as her Healer.” Dr. Kale walked over to me, and touched the side of my face. “I’m not just saying that because of the financial benefits. Induced Ascension is extremely rare today, but it’s a wonderful thing, an incredible bonding opportunity. You shouldn’t be afraid. She loves you, and the core part of her being won’t change.”

I nodded. Ascension struck terror into my heart, but I’d have to face it if I wanted my wife to live.

I’d have to be strong for her.

***

Each gripping a handle of the metallic keg, Regan and Addison carried it into the basement, refusing to lug it upstairs. The cylindrical structure stood as tall as my chest, and weighed well over a thousand pounds. It held a hundred and twenty-four gallons of a nutrient solution, a meal replacement drink intended for bodybuilding. Its high nutritional value also made it ideal for induced Ascension.

Induced Ascension differed from inherited. It progressed over the course of several hours, not years. Furthermore, it required a Healer, a male within three to four years of the recipient. The male had to be at least twenty-two years old, the age when the dormant virus activated. Since Luna and I were the same age, I could serve as her Healer.

In spite of the noise made by the pouring of ice into the bucket, Luna didn’t awaken. She lay asleep in the guest bed. Like all furniture, the bed was designed for Ascended women, and she occupied merely a fraction of the mattress.

“Alright, you’re all set.” Regan knelt and clapped her hand over my shoulder.  “Remember, she’ll need to eat a lot. If you need anything, just give us a call.”

“Wait, you’re leaving?”

She smirked. “Do you really want me here when you...treat her? Because if you do, I’ll stay.”

“Well, no.” My face reddened. “But I was hoping you’d help me convince her.”

“Ash, I’ve spent years begging her to ascend. I’ve explained all of the benefits countless times. She doesn’t even listen to me anymore, not on that subject. You’re the only one with a chance of convincing her. You’re her husband, but more importantly she loves you more than anything. If it’s something you want her to do, she’ll listen.”

I swallowed and breathed deeply, calming my nerves. “Ok. I guess you’re right.”

“This house, your car, we’ve given you so much freedom, well beyond what most men get. That’s because we trust you to make the right decisions in many aspects of life. Your conversation with Luna will be the ultimate test of our trust. Ascension is a decision she has to make for herself, but only you can lead her to the right choice.”

I nodded. They had so much faith in me. Why did I run from them at the mall? I’d taken their trust and spit on it.

I hugged Regan’s neck. “I’m so glad you’re not mad at me anymore.”

“Ash, I could never stay mad at you for long. Please, just heal my best friend.”

Addison’s arms draped across my back, completing the three-person embrace.

My Guardians rose and headed for the stairs. Regan turned. “Remember, staying home tonight. A single phone call, and one of us will be here within seconds.”

The front door opened and shut, the deadbolt clunked, and the security alarm armed. They were gone.

And I was alone with my wife, facing my greatest fear.

***

Using the booster step, I climbed into bed, slipped under the covers, and snuggled against my wife’s back. As usual, we shared the same pillow. However, that would probably change, as would many aspects of our life together.

She wore her cotton nightgown, white with short sleeves, the same thing she wore every night. She would need to get new clothing, but that didn’t bother me. Not being able to hold her like this, my arms encircling her waist, my nose smelling her hair — that bothered me.

She stirred, then turned over, looking at me with sleepy eyes. After a few blinks, her eyes widened, and she bolted upright. “Ash!”

“I’m right here, honey.” I sat up and hugged her head against my chest. “I know about the brain tumor. Don’t worry, we’re going to get through this. Everything’s going to be ok.”

Her shoulders deflated, then shook as she sobbed into my shirt. She was so small in my arms. I couldn’t imagine her ever being the size of Addison or Regan. How would I be able to comfort her? How would I be able to do anything for her that she couldn’t easily do for herself?

“They wanted me to Ascend.” She blubbered into my chest. “I told them no. I’ll never do it. My head feels fine now.”

I just hugged her, rocking back and forth, letting her get it all out. She needed this catharsis before she’d be receptive to new ideas. Eventually, her crying abated, and she looked at me with eyes that begged for confirmation.

I kissed her forehead, and smoothed her disheveled hair. “It’s going to be ok. No one’s going to make you Ascend.”

“What about Regan?” she asked. “She’s always wanted me to Ascend.”

I chuckled. “She still wants that. See?” I pointed. “She bought an entire keg of nutrient solution for when you get hungry.”

Luna’s fingers dug into my back. “I’m never...I refuse! My head doesn’t hurt anymore. Really, Ash. It feels fine.”

“I know. I believe you.” I rubbed her back.

Minutes passed. Though it felt like midnight, it couldn’t have been much later than seven o’clock. Eventually, her trembling subsided.

“Ash, what do you want?” Her voice was soft, almost pleading.

“I’ll support you in your decision, whatever it may be. I’ll always support you.”

“What do you think I should do?”

“If you’re not sure, let’s talk about it. What are the reasons you don’t want to Ascend?”

Her brow furrowed and her mouth twisted in thought. Then, she said, “I like to be carried.”

I laughed. “Ok, anything else?”

“I like how when I get something sweet, it lasts longer because it’s so big.”

“Regan doesn’t buy us sweets.”

“Sometimes my friends at work will give me candy.” She gave me a sly smile, making me laugh even harder.

After I’d regained my composure, I asked, “What else?”

“I like how everyone thinks I’m special. They pay attention to me because I’m small.”

I hated that aspect of being small, but she saw things differently than me — one of the things I loved about her. “Keep going.”

She paused, and her smile disappeared. “I don’t want to be like Regan.”

“How so?”

“She makes you do things. She embarrases you. You don’t like her very much.”

I shouldn’t have been surprised, but I was. Luna had made logical assumptions based on my reactions to Regan’s treatment. She’d internalized those assumptions and used them to strengthen her case against Ascension — once again, completely my fault.

“Honey, Regan and I talked a lot today while you were asleep. In spite of all my complaining, I don’t hate her. I’m probably the only man in the world married to an unascended wife. I have that privilege because she and Regan agreed to become our Guardians. They sacrifice their time to protect us. They permit us to live in this house as a couple. We have a car. We even get a small allowance. All of my independence in this world is a gift from them.”

“Really?” 

“Absolutely. If anything, I should show her my appreciation more often.”

She sniffled. “So even if I became like her, you wouldn’t hate me?”

I smiled and caressed her neck from ear to collarbone. “Honey, I’d never hate you, no matter what you did. I’ll always love you. Even if you became the strictest wife in the world, and made me eat slimy okra, I’d love you.”

She gasped, knowing how much I hated that vegetable. “I would never do that.”

I laughed. “See? You won’t be the same as her.” Her resolve seemed to be cracking.

“I don’t understand, Ash. You never wanted me to ascend in the past. Aren’t you afraid of what it might do to our relationship?”

I inhaled deeply. I’d hoped she wouldn’t ask that question. Still, she did, and I needed to answer it. “Honestly, yes, I’m afraid, but not about the things you mentioned. I’m afraid you’ll get smarter than me. I’m afraid I’ll bore you mentally and be unable to please you physically. I’m afraid of a lot of things, but when I look in your eyes, I feel something that washes all that fear away. I see how much you love me, and I know that will never disappear.”

Tears puddled in her eyes, and her chin quivered. She hugged me tight, her face buried into my chest. When she released me, she asked, “You promise you’ll never leave me?”

“I promise.”

She took deep breaths, in and out, slowing in their frequency until she spoke again, calmer. “The doctor said my personality wouldn’t change.”

She was coming around to the idea of Ascending. “It won’t. You’ll always be Luna. You won’t have memory issues, and you may find certain mental tasks easier to perform, but you won’t be a different person.”

“I’ll be bigger.”

“Yes. Maybe not quite as big as Regan, but you’ll be big compared to me.”

“No one will be able to carry me anymore.”

“That’s true. But you’ll be able to do new things. Fun things.”

“Like what?” She asked, suspicion in her tone. Surely, she’d consider the benefits of Ascension before.

“Well, you’d be able to carry me.”

She giggled. “You’d let me carry you?”

“I’d insist on it, especially if we went hiking again.”

Her smile broadened. “What else?”

“All kinds of things. You could open the pickle jar when it’s stuck. You wouldn’t have to use the booster steps. You could go clothes shopping with Regan, and actually buy things for yourself.”

“Would you come with me?”

“Sure. In fact, once you’re Ascended, we could visit so many new places together. We wouldn’t have to worry about security rankings. We could go to Baskin-Robbins and eat all the ice cream we want.”

She beamed, her eyes distant. Then, she focused on me again, her expression serious. “Would you want me to Ascend even if I didn’t have brain cancer?”

Another tough question. “Before today, the answer would have been ‘no’. I’m still afraid, but I’ve had time to think. Even without the tumor, I would want you to Ascend.”

She nodded. “Will you still guide me after I Ascend?”

“Legally, you’ll be my new Guardian. You’ll have the final say in all major decisions. However, I’ll still be your husband, and I’ll always be here for advice.”

She stared deep into my eyes, her good eye seeming to search my soul. Then, we kissed, a deep, mouth-probing kiss. Would I ever be able to kiss her this way again? Would my comparatively small mouth be enough?

As if reading my mind, she breathed her answer. “You’ll always be more than enough for me. Whatever happens, you’ll always be so much more than enough. No one makes me feel the way you do, Ash. I’m not me without you.”

I ran my fingers through the hair at the base of her skull, a sand-colored expanse of silky waves. There would be more of that, too. More of the things I liked about her. I slid my other hand along the curves of her body, committing them to memory one last time.

“Are we going to do it, Ash?” Her hands dipped under my shirt and explored my torso.

“I want to, but it’s your decision. Do you want to Ascend?”

She nodded, her mouth partway open, nearly panting.

“Say it out loud.”

“Yes, Ash. I want to Ascend. I want to Ascend with you at my side.”