I nervously skim the sides of my eyes with the fine, grainy pencil. All the while I can see her staring at me, her gaze casting judgement upon me. I'd like to see her do better, psh. Now she's looking at me with a look of slight annoyance on her face. I lean in closer, as if I'm going to really confront her, but instead I focus on my appearance, applying the rest of my eye makeup. I put the eye pencil down on the counter and sigh. It's been a while since I did this, I thought to myself with a half chuckle.

It was so weird having my life back ... in a sense. I mean, things would never be the same... how could they be? As I made my way from the bathroom back to my adjacent bedroom (oh how I missed having facilities so close by!) it was impossible for me not to look inside my purse and see little Jake inside sleeping. It was admittedly cute and the more I had gotten used to this strange sight, the more I began to feel emotional about seeing him go.

Still, as his friend (and in a way, his caretaker) I knew what I had to do, even though I really didn't want to. I walked away from my purse and Jake and went into a quiet room, just across from my dad's room. It was still fairly early so my dad was still asleep and I should be able to get on the phone real quick without waking anyone.

Understandably, it had been a turbulent couple of days and nobody had really slept, not myself, not my dad and not even Kevin from what I could tell. He had sent me a couple of sweet messages the past night or so, just making sure I was okay. He was beyond concerned for me and it almost made me wonder where all of that love was during our past relationship. While I wondered this, my mind inevitably wandered back to Jake and how Kevin knew all of this in the first place and didn't tell me. I felt kind of lied to concerning that strange pepper spray and I couldn't help but feeling that Kevin knew more than he let on. If he was keeping that a secret from me, what else was there?

As all this went on within my head, I almost missed the sound of the lady on the other end answering her phone. After several awkward moments of waiting, I was nearly caught off guard by her response.

"Um, hello...?" the girl said, sounding somewhat bewildered.

"Hi," I said, feeling nervous myself. The brief moments in between my phrases seemed to drag on forever, but that was probably just me experiencing that awkwardness. "Um... is this Kendra?"

"Yes..." she said, taking another eternal pause. "...who is this?"

Who is this? I thought in my head, my mind suddenly racing. Who is this? Who am I? Damn it, just answer her. Wow, really? I'm really thinking this hard about this? Who is this? I'm uh... the girl who owns Jake, no the girl who shrunk your ex boyfriend. I mean, really? Ugh, answer her... this is getting weird.

"I'm uh... I'm a friend of Jake's" I said, almost a little too non-chalant. She'd never buy that.

"Jake...? Why didn't he call me himself? You haven't hurt him, have you?" Kendra asked, almost sounding defensive all of a sudden.

"What?" I snapped, my voice raising a little. How dare she! "No... I have not hurt Jake and I would never... and..."

"Okay okay, calm down" Kendra said, her voice softening a little, "I just... I'm a little bit skeptical of everything he's told me..."

"Wh-What ... has he told you?" I asked, almost afraid to know.

"Well this is going to sound crazy..." Kendra explained, "but Jake told me... he was shrunk and that some girl named Lillian was taking care of him, he wouldn't give me more details than that but he said he was going to call me or something... did his phone die?"

I hesitated to answer. I think it had but I honestly hadn't checked. Did it really matter, though?

"Y'know I'm not sure..." I said nervously. "I know that he wanted to see you though and as weird as THIS will sound... I was wondering if you'd like to meet up sometime... so I can um... give him to you"

God, I felt weird saying that. Not just because I was letting this girl in on our secret, but just everything I said made me feel worse about the situation. 'Give him to you'... like he was stuff, or something. I felt horrible about this but what choice did I have? I vowed that if Kevin ever was more clear about a cure to the shrinking drug or even some kind of solution that I would let Jake know, no matter where he was or who had him. I wasn't content with giving my friend away and watching him spend the rest of his life as a pet. I couldn't and wouldn't do that to him -- especially after all he had done for me.

"So um... I take it you're Lillian?" Kendra asked after a long pause. Again, I was speechless.

"Yes" I chuckled, "Yes, I sure am... I am... Lillian..."

"Are you always this awkward?" Kendra asked with a laugh.

I almost wanted to slap this chick if it wasn't for the fact that I knew Jake cared for her. Plus, she would hopefully treat him right. Again, I felt like I was treating my friend like a pet... putting him up for adoption...? Maybe I didn't want to do this... but I had come this far.

"I'm uh... just a little nervous" I said, jostling the phone in my hands while I sat up and placed it gently on my shoulder, letting it rest against my face. "I um... I guess you could say I owe Jake a lot and I want to make sure he's taken care of"

There was a long pause on Kendra's end. For a while I looked at my phone in disbelief, wondering if we had lost signal. Finally she spoke.

"I'll take care of him, I promise" she said.

She seemed sincere and it was the first time she seemed speechless for a while so I took it that this was her real personality and not the snarky bitch that had picked up the phone. I think she was understandably skeptical but now that she understood the gravity of our situation, she was more responsive to help. I smiled a bit, reassuring myself that I was doing the right thing.

"Thank you Kendra" I replied, "so when and where would you like to meet?"

"Anywhere, anytime's good for me" Kendra responded without much hesitation.

It was like she couldn't wait to get her hands on her ex-man. This made me a bit uneasy again but I decided it was now or never. No need to get Kevin or anyone else involved... I wanted to do this before I changed my mind. Even if he wouldn't admit it, I think Jake had wanted this too. I know he cared for me and I cared for him too but he'd feel much better being with someone he knows. This is what he had wanted, right?

"Okay" I said, clumsily retaining my phone after nearly dropping it, "what are you closest to? I could meet you at Michael's Diner in a half hour if that works? Or somewhere else?"

"No, that'll work" Kendra said, sounding like she was on the move already. "I'll be there in 30"

There was a click on the other end and the line went silent. She was gone -- already en route to meet me there. Was I sure about this?

I returned to my bedroom and saw the purse sitting peacefully on my desk. I peered inside and saw Jake still sleeping, tossing about a little bit but generally peaceful as well. I frowned and slowly lowered my phone next to him. I zipped up the purse slowly, trying not to wake him, but the sound of the zipper may have caused him to stir. I decided it would be best to continue on this path before I got "cold feet"

I quietly slipped out my front door and jogged down the front steps, only briefly remembering what I must be doing to Jake. As soon as I made this realization I came to a complete stop, setting the purse down on the back of my car and looking inside to see Jake, disoriented.

"I'm so sorry" I sighed, "Wow, I'm an idiot sometimes. Are you okay?"

Jake took a few moments before nodding weakly.

"Yeah, I'm... I'm good..." he said, shaking his head some more, "but what's the hurry?"

"I'm uh... taking you somewhere" I said, trying to maintain a smile. I felt like such a horrible person for saying this, "We're going to see Kendra now"

"Oh" he said, not appearing as happy as I had hoped he would, "Okay"

He seemed utterly scared shitless and stiff to be honest. Anything but happy.

"If you don't want me to, I don't..." I started

"Oh no, it's all good" he said, trying to keep cool but I could tell there was something on his mind, "Th-Thank you... for calling her"

I nodded.

"I said I would" I said, "and I just figure... she'll take better care of you"

"I don't know about better care..." Jake frowned, "she knows me better but that doesn't mean much, Lil... I mean... Kelly"

"Yeah, we'll have to talk about that too" i said, slowly bringing my purse into the car with me and setting it down on the passenger seat. I knew I wouldn't be able to hear Jake from his current position at his current size, so I gently lifted him from the bag and set him on my shoulder, brushing the hair away. I took a brief glance at myself in the rearview mirror. Shit, I still looked pretty lousy... and I needed some work with the eye pencil to be sure.

I don't know why but I cared what I looked like for this girl. I didn't want her to think some total loser was taking care of Jake.

"So what did you want to talk about?" Jake asked nervously, his voice briefly gracing my ears.

"You uh... told Kendra, my name was Lillian..." I said

"Yeah, um... I mean, we don't have to..." he stuttered. He could be so cute when he was nervous. Of course he had nothing to be afraid of but I could understand his apprehension. I don't know what I'd do if somebody so giant was in control of me. Oh wait, yes I would... I was once in his position not so long ago. I'd probably run for it if I could. I actually found it remarkable how trusting Jake was with me. I only hoped he'd be just as trusting with Kendra or whomever else took care of him. My gosh, what had I done? I had reduced this poor guy to a pet... he may always need some kind of supervision from now on and it was all my fault.

"Jake it's okay" I said in a hushed tone so I wouldn't startle him too much. I had also gotten good at being the 'giant' one and making sure I didn't overwhelm little Jake. After all, I knew what that was like too. 90% of the people who found me didn't give a shit if they scared me or mocked me... in fact they seemed to live off it. Jake was the only one who showed any genuine care for me as a person. Of course I owed him at least that much back. "Like I said, we can do whatever you'd like... you could've told her my name was Bob for all I care"

"That'd be a lousy name for a pretty girl like you" Jake laughed. I almost instantly blushed. In fact, the more I thought about it and realized how easy it would be for him to notice my blushing, the more red I could feel my face getting. It was a good thing I was alreay focused on the road and not Jake or I would've found it nearly impossible to make eye contact with him at this moment. Was he hitting on me? Did it even matter? I already found him cute in his own way, but that brought forth another question. Did I find him cute because of him or did I find him cute because he was small? Admittedly, on more than one occasion, I had been intrigued by his small stature and wanted to just take him in, in all of his tiny glory, as awful as that sounded. In fact, to an extent I could figure out why some of the museum patrons and others who found me gave me such "hungry" looks. It sounded and felt awful but there were times I felt the same about cute little Jake.

"So... is this goodbye?" Jake asked after a long pause. I started becoming emotional but maintained my focus on the road. At least it was only a little further because I didn't know how long I could make it like this. I was constantly being attacked in my mind by thoughts of turning back. But then what? I couldn't keep the poor guy in my purse forever and this wasn't fair to him. I had to do this. We had to do this.

"It's not..." I said, slowly, "it's not goodbye Jake... in fact I want to hear from you as much as possible, okay? Do you have my number?"

"No," he frowned, "I gave you mine earlier"

"Yes, yes you did" I smiled, remembering that fact from just last night, "I'll text you, okay? I want you to be okay, Jake... I'll let you know as soon as I find out anything pertaining to this shrinking business... in the meantime, please be okay... will Kendra take you back to your family?"

Jake shrugged,

"Yes... I mean, I think she will" he said.

"You're sure this is what you wanted?" I asked, as I slowed my car to a stop and threw it into park. I looked out at the diner and took a deep breath, exhaling and reaching for Jake on my shoulder. I gently lowered him into my other hand, getting a good long look. It just may very well be my last.

Jake just nodded.

"Yes, kelly... thank you" he said, sounding very business like. I fought back my tears and slowly lowered him into my purse, making sure he was okay. I was almost tempted to kiss him but I decided against it. I didn't need this getting any weirder.

As I walked towards an empty table, my legs felt like they were getting heavier and heavier with each step. I wanted to turn back so bad but there was no choice. I had to do this. I sat down and was about to text Kendra. I took out my phone and typed 3 letters before my focus was diverted elsewhere, and then -- there she was.

This skinny girl with dirty blonde hair took her seat across from me at the table. She was wearing a blue ribbon in her hair and had a vibrant red lipstick on (although it was kind of uneven and certain parts of her lips lacked the same level of glisten). She was wearing a black sweatshirt with an exotic logo on it. It was the logo for the Rotten Rose, a biker bar from in the city. She had a light perfume on and admittedly smelled good. She made me feel instantly unattractive, but she seemed pleasant enough. I couldn't say I blamed Jake for wanting to see her.

"Hi" she said, in a light tone. "So you're...?"

"Yes" I said, smiling and shaking her hand. "I'm Lillian"

I felt weird saying that but I figured, why the hell not? It wasnt like I'd have to be "Lillian" that much longer. Plus, it was probably better if Kendra didn't know my real name.

"Hmm, I thought you'd be taller" she said with a smile, "Nah I'm just messing... I'm only going by Jake's description"

I forced a smile.

"So... where is the little guy?" she asked.

I took a deep breath. Please forgive me, Jake, I thought to myself as I calmly unzipped my purse and lifted him out. Almost instantly the blonde girl's eyes lit up like a kid on Christmas.

"Oh my gosh, Jake!" she squealed. I looked around nervously to make sure she wasn't attracting any unneeded attention. "He is... so small"

I nodded.

"Please..." I said, making eye contact with Kendra, "Be careful with him. Please."

Kendra nodded and slowly took him from my hand, keeping him safe between two fingers before dropping him into her other hand. He stared up at her with a dumbfounded look on his face. I bet he never thought this petite girl would be towering over him. I thought I was short but this girl seemed a good few inches shorter than me -- she couldn't have been more than 5'2. I glanced down at my empty hand and instantly felt like I had lost perhaps the most valuable thing -- person, I had ever held.

"I will be super careful with him, don't you worry" Kendra said, looking me in the eye. She then turned her attention to the little man she had perched in her palm, "and don't you worry, little Jake! You are so cute!"

I sighed uneasily. Now what? I couldn't just leave her with him but what else was there to do?

"You sure you don't mind doing this?" I asked Kendra.

"Not at all" she smiled, and slid Jake into the side pocket on her hoodie.

"Is he... going to be okay in there?" I asked, watching her get up kind of quick. She may have accidentally hurt him

"Of course" Kendra smiled, keeping her hand tucked in the pocket with Jake so he didn't fall out. "I will handle this, Lillian, don't worry"

"If -- if you say so" I said, already watching her walk away. This was moving way too fast. Should I stop her?

"Hey, no worries" Kendra muttered, already heading for the door, "Thanks for keeping him safe for me, I'll call you if I have any questions"

Kendra left pretty quickly with Jake secured in her pockets which got me to worrying even more. I instantly had to get up and leave the restuarant. Not even a minute had gone by since that whole ... thing and Kendra was nowhere to be seen. Had she taken off with him already? Jake... what had I done?

I went into my car and shut the door. As soon as I was sure nobody was watching, I broke down and cried, leaning my head against the dashboard of my car. Jake... I'm so sorry, I thought to myself. I resorted to my phone and typed him a text message.

"Jake, I will always love you..." I typed.

I paused. I didn't want to say that -- even if it was true.

I deleted it and re-typed the message instead.

"Jake, please let me know you're alright asap. Let me know what happens with Kendra. Thank you so much for everything =) "

I sent my message and let my phone fall to the floor as the emotion seized me.

Goodbye, my friend.