Reviewer: Nostory Signed [Report This]
Date: January 21 2015 8:08 AM Title: Chapter 2: From One Extreme To The Other

It was entertaining and I liked how you had them all mess up at the end to leave Kitty the opposite of 3 inches tall. 

 

One piece of advice I'd like to impart would be that you tell too much of the story, instead of showing it. Sometimes you should just describe the events instead to let it flow better rather than explaining in great detail why one character would never do something. It can also take away the element of surprise. 

 

 

Author's Response:

Thanks for the review and I will follow your advice.