Reviews For Pariah
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Reviewer: Jim1989 Signed [Report This]
Date: September 15 2013 10:21 PM Title: The Closing Door

The size difference between both characters has gotta be pretty extreme by this point.  I'm guessing Nick is around 2 feet tall or less, while Michelle is around 8 feet tall (maybe more).  Maybe you can clarify on what their exact heights are in the next chapter.

I like how you show Michelle is somewhat internally conflicted on what she is doing and not just plain cruel (at least not entirely).  Keeps the reader guessing.  Looking forward to where things are going to go from there.



Author's Response:

Hmm, you're right, I haven't done the best job making their heights clear lately.  She grows only a touch taller each time, with most of the growth being 'horizontal' development instead.  She's "only" about 6'11" now (though, e.g., with her 8" heels on a couple chapters ago she was more like 7'6").  And Nick's about 2'6" after this last chapter.  I'll try to work this organically into the next chapter somehow though.

Thanks -- the internal conflict bit was a last-minute addition I just added, kinda based on reader feedback in part, so we'll see how it plays out from here :).

Reviewer: Flaming_Heart Signed [Report This]
Date: September 08 2013 9:31 PM Title: Michelle's Room (part 3)

More brain teasers and they seem to be affecting Nick the most.
Nice chapter.

Author's Response:

Thanks!  Glad you liked it.

Reviewer: smoki1020 Signed [Report This]
Date: September 05 2013 9:14 AM Title: The Lab Partner

Great story, but I can't catch Michelle personality: evil, gentle or just a psycho.



Author's Response:

That's pretty much what I intended, yes.

Well, originally in my head Michelle was just pure evil, but in later drafts things became a little more interesting/muddy.  I like it better that way, I think.

Reviewer: Jim1989 Signed [Report This]
Date: September 04 2013 10:56 PM Title: Michelle's Room (part 2)

I'm kind of torn about this story now.  The writing is very detailed and suspenseful and the plot still has that sense of unpredictability and keeping the reader constantly guessing.  For that reason, I will most likely continue reading this story just to see how everything pans out in the end.

Having said that, I'm kind of sad to see that Nick has now fully given into carnal, animalistic instinct.  I had a feeling that was probably Michelle's endgame, though seeing it happen - and to see that Nick wants it to happen by this point - makes my stomach a bit uneasy.  I'm also curious how far this story is from the conclusion.  From a logical standpoint, Michelle has pretty much gotten all she wants out of Nick (except for maybe a few more inches or even a foot out of him).  He's physically and mentally a small child or toddler by this point, so he's going to put up little or no resistance to Michelle's commands.  

It does seem like Michelle has also taken that darker route like I guessed last time.  I don't know if Michelle might do a last-minute switch in personality at the story's end and have some degree of sympathy for Nick (I'd like that but I won't hold my breath on it).  She could easily kill Nick and probably find a way to cover her tracks so that nobody would ever be able to pin his death onto her (given her level of intelligence).  Then the story would pretty much be over by that point.  

Again, I'm hoping for something not completely depressing for Nick and possibly a bit unexpected at the end; but as always, it's your story and you decide how it ends.  Nick may very well be a slave for the rest of his life and Michelle may become a power-hungry manipulator.  Maybe neither of those things.  Either way, I still intend to keep up with this story, mainly out of great curiosity.

Reviewer: aknouh Signed half-star [Report This]
Date: September 03 2013 4:49 PM Title: Michelle's Room (part 2)

eh....just lost interest...



Author's Response:

Haha ... yeah.  You were hoping she'd turn nicer but she took a sharp turn in the opposite direction, didn't she.  Sorry to get your hopes up, didn't want to give anything away earlier.

Reviewer: Flaming_Heart Signed [Report This]
Date: September 03 2013 5:56 AM Title: Michelle's Room (part 2)

Very long brain teaser chapter.

I love it, can't wait for more.



Author's Response:

Yeah, I couldn't believe how long this whole 'scene' got (stretched into 3 chapters).  It's longer than most whole stories :O

Reviewer: riczar Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: September 03 2013 4:55 AM Title: The Lab Partner

I can't tell what the hell she wants anymore.  In a way she's been fooling the readers as much as him (though we always wondered).  I'm curious as to what she's training him for.  Is it the typical shrunken sex slave, or is she trying to build the perfect man from scratch?  That is, rebuild his mind to her preference, and slowly grow him back, maybe even giving him some intelligence.  She did have a crush on him before.  Maybe she still hopes to have something with him.  Again, I'm praying they'll be no "evil" ending.  But the story is very good and I can't wait to read more.



Author's Response:

Thanks, stay tuned ...

Reviewer: zephilia Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: September 03 2013 3:11 AM Title: Michelle's Room (part 2)

God what a great chapter, wonder what kind of trainging she'll do next.



Author's Response:

Thanks!  This might have been my favorite chapter to write.

Reviewer: Jim1989 Signed [Report This]
Date: August 29 2013 11:08 PM Title: Michelle's Room (part 1)

Nicely written.  I like how you let the reader get inside Michelle's head and see things from her point of view the same as Nick's.  I'm also wondering if Nick is starting to catch on to Michelle's true nature (even with his decreased mental state).  I'm curious if Michelle possibly foreshadowed her endgame objective to Nick - about forever changing him and making him submissive.  It sounded pretty ominous.

A part of me is still rooting for Nick in a way.  It's hard to not feel sorry for him whenever Michelle toys with both his body and his emotional state, though it does make for good moments of tension and drama.  I'm not sure if Michelle is gonna continue her playful (yet manipulative) charade or go a much darker route with how she toys with Nick (possibly do a total 180 in how she acts around him?).  I'm also curious if she's really bringing the principal into her plans or if that was just a bluff to get Nick riled up.

Curious as to what's in store for Nick in the next chapter.  From the tone in Michelle's voice, it doesn't sound like it will be very good for him (especially now that he can't achieve orgasm to ease his growing libido).

Again, good stuff.



Author's Response:

Yeah, most of the story until now was written from Nick's perspective, so it was fun to add Michelle's perspective now too.  And you picked up on everything I was going for in this chapter with Michelle's plans and Colin and stuff -- good to see.  Will post the next chapter probably early next week.

Reviewer: youre_my_slave Signed [Report This]
Date: August 29 2013 7:05 PM Title: Michelle's Room (part 1)

The PRINCIPAL is doing all this for her? She's like 15! What a fuckin creep...

Author's Response:

18.



Author's Response:

18.

Reviewer: zephilia Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: August 28 2013 8:50 AM Title: The Intruder

I really hope hegets whats coming to him. I just read the entire thin and I still feel he will try to take advantage of her if he finds out. I hope she uses him to get off anf that more violence is on the way. He deserves it.



Author's Response:

Glad to hear it.  A lot of people have told me they feel bad for Nick and want things to turn around for him ... glad not everyone feels that way though.

Reviewer: Anonymous316 Signed [Report This]
Date: August 25 2013 1:24 PM Title: The Lab Partner

Can't wait for the part where he realises what's happening to him (if he does realise).

Author's Response:

Indeed.

Reviewer: Antagoniser Signed [Report This]
Date: August 25 2013 9:16 AM Title: The Intruder

I LOVE how manipulative Michelle is getting at this point, can't wait to hear what happens next :D



Author's Response:

Next chapter's a doozy ... 

Reviewer: angeloflife Signed [Report This]
Date: August 25 2013 1:19 AM Title: The Intruder

At this point poor Nick has been reduce to nothing more than a little kid with a mind that is about the same. Michelle is really no better than Nick was when he was before all this.

She may be a little wrost now that she is toying with basically a little kid.

I don't see the enjoyment in seeing anyone getting manipulated and tormented like this, some revenge is nice hear and there but that has been long gone by now.

 

This is not my type of story, i dislike seeing what is going on and feel bad for Nick each time i read it.

I read it because am seeing how will this play out and read it long enough to not stop reading it. Am hoping to see a good out come for Nick by the end of it.



Author's Response:

Well, of COURSE an angel of life would say that ... lol, just kidding.  But for me it's all about the manipulation and torment, but I know it's not for everyone.

Reviewer: Gtslover4 Signed [Report This]
Date: August 25 2013 12:27 AM Title: The Intruder

Things ever gonna change for Nick? Michelle at this point is no better then Nick was in the beginning.

Author's Response:

Yeah, I agree, Michelle is not exactly a 'good person', but maybe she was never supposed to be, or maybe she was corrupted by power, eh?  As I told the last reviewer, for me it's not really about 'getting even' with him anymore, we're well past that.

Reviewer: Jim1989 Signed [Report This]
Date: August 24 2013 7:59 PM Title: The Lab Partner

I've enjoyed this story on the whole, especially Michelle's back-and-forth displays of cruelty and care for Nick (even though most or all of it is pretty much just an act).  I'm kind of wondering how much Michelle is gonna shrink Nick by the story's end.  

I'm also hoping Nick doesn't meet a completely tragic ending (especially one where he stays in his shrunken state for the rest of his life).  I'd like to think he'd gain a little humility and tell Michelle he's genuinely sorry for how he acted before the experiment.  Either that or he has some kind of epiphany and just tells Michelle he knows that she's just playing him by this point.  Personally, I think Michelle is going a tad overboard with getting vengeance on Nick the more she shrinks him (especially given his mental/emotional state), but that's just an outsider's view on the story.  Don't let my view on things rattle how you go about the plot.

Regardless of how things end, it's been a thoroughly intriguing read on the whole.  Probably one of the best I've read on this site in months.  Looking forward to more soon.



Author's Response:

Thanks!

The way I see it, by this point in the story it's less about Michelle exacting revenge on him and more about Michelle 'experimenting' on him and seeing what she can do to his mind as well as body.

As for the ending, it's a ways off still but you might find it interesting how it plays out (I hope!).

Reviewer: Flaming_Heart Signed [Report This]
Date: August 21 2013 10:38 AM Title: Breakfast (part 2)

Oh snap Nick got smaller,

Its's awesome how Michelle can manipulate Nick so easy,

Wonder what going to happen next.

Nice chapter.



Author's Response:

Lucky reviewer number 69!  Whooo!

Reviewer: anonyguy Signed [Report This]
Date: August 15 2013 3:50 PM Title: The Lab Partner

You should have Michelle wear a dirndl. 



Author's Response:

Meh, that doesn't really do anything for me in particular.  But that's the power of story -- you can imagine her wearing anything you want, right?

Reviewer: Anonymous316 Signed [Report This]
Date: August 11 2013 12:09 PM Title: The Lab Partner

If you upload another chapter today you will be so awesome.

Reviewer: Pico Signed starstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: August 04 2013 12:56 AM Title: After Dinner

Loving the continuation of this story.

The kiss was an awesome start... 

... to somethinge more??? :)

And a half hour is quite long... I didn't know he had it in him. (Pun intended.)



Author's Response:

Yeah, that half hour really took a lot out of him. (another pun!)

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