Reviewer: riczar Signed [Report This]
Date: February 23 2014 11:07 AM Title: Chapter Nine: The Aftermath

This ending is better then the first one, but still seems kind of weak.  I liked the almost omninous way you had Allison survive in the last one.  Like she could return some day.  Remember, the shrinking formula was untested and rushed.  It was nice for Mark to learn a lesson from this, but it just rubs me the wrong way that he would subordinate himself to Chuck and become a hero.  It might seem better if he became an anti-hero, or a hero with an attitude.  I just think you wrapped it up a little TOO cleanly.

Author's Response:

I know what you mean.  Especially about Mark subordinating himself, but I had a reason for this.

 

*Cough* Sequel *Cough*