Chapter 20 – The End

Kat was startled by the call. She recognized her mother’s voice. But she also knew she had to lie somewhat and hide her current state of mind. She couldn’t allow anyone, save Mouse, to see her as she was – truly a wreck for the time being. But she was a MacGregor, an heiress. She knew better than to give in to weakness and, worst of all, to let others see her being weak. She took a deep breath, got up and composed her best just woken face, wiping her tears with the back of her hand and walking toward the door.

“Sorry Mom” she finally said, opening the door slightly. “I just had the worst nightmare, that’s all.”

“Really?” inquired her mother, looking somewhat dubitative, but Kat did her best to conceal her real state of mind and, thankfully, it seemed that her mother had more pressing matters on her mind than a scream in her daughter’s room. “You screamed loud enough to wake the dead. If you can, try to better control your dreams, girl”; and with that she was gone.

Kat stood silently until she was sure her mm was gone, and then she let herself slide on the ground. She then looked again at Mouse, who seemed somewhat lost in bliss. She felt jealous of him. For the first time ever, she was jealous of a Minor – an asthmatic one at that. Clearly their deep dive into the Bond had been incredible in the best sense of the word for him while for her, it had been anything but that. She had been so sure that she’d be able to take anything in stride and now she found herself on the verge of tears as she remembered the feelings she had experienced.

She couldn’t deny the power of the Bond, nor the revelations it had brought. She knew that what she had learnt about herself would be useful in the future. But that… that dilution of individuality, that disappearance as she became something else entirely, something which could only exists with Mouse, when their consciousness became one and thus more than the sum of their parts… she had a hard time even grasping what she had experienced in those moments, as if her MAJOR mind was unable to accept, to comprehend it.

“You okay?” asked Mouse, surprising him as he came closer to her, putting his hand on her arm, a look of worry starting to appear on his face.

“Yeah” she replied, intend of preserving his wonderful memories of this event. “I just need some time to get back to myself. It was…. it was quite something we did, we lived through, after all.”

“Yeah” he mumbled and she saw that he was lost in the recent memories again, his mouth spreading into a smile. “But you don’t seem to have liked it too much” he added as he focused back on her.

“While I was in it, it was the best experience ever. But to cease to be, like that… how come you aren’t horrified too?”

“Why would I have been horrified?”

He seemed genuinely confused by her question and it made her pause. Why wasn’t he just as terrified as she was? Didn’t he felt that what they had experienced was too deep, too powerful, too alien to one’s mind? Or was it because he was a Minor just as much as she herself was a MAJOR and was thus unable to live through the same event in the same way as he did. Somehow, this idea gave her some much needed resolve. She couldn’t be a wreck when her Mouse boyfriend was fine – more than fine even, elated. It wouldn’t do at all.

“It’s nothing” she said, ruffling his hair, perhaps a tad too roughly to entirely hide her current state of mind.

She took a deep breath and frowned. She shouldn’t focus on what she felt after they had reached the Event Horizon of this Deep Bonding. At that time, she had discovered who she was, and that was what mattered. She was indeed the Apex Predator she had always assumed to be. She needed to be honest with herself and others about it, now she realized it. Which didn’t mean that she should just throw away all caution, of course. She mostly wanted to be herself fully with Mouse, which meant dominating him in satisfying ways.

“Come here” she ordered as she grasped his shoulders and forced him to turn around to face her fully, so she could French kiss him vigorously. “There, I’m already feeling better” she growled, grinning – and then pushing Jordan on the ground.

He looked at her, puzzled, as if the effects of their Bonding were still presents. She smirked. She’d have to find a way to make him forget it really soon. And she was confident that she’d be able to do so. They were both naked so she didn’t had the opportunity to tore his clothes off, but she knew she didn’t need to. He craved it, those instants where she was absolutely dominant, when she did to him whatever she wanted to do. He gasped when her nails grazed the fragile skin of his torso as they traced their way downward, toward his penis.

“Kat… you don’t need to…” he started, but she cut him off.

“I know. But I want to, and that’s all that matters, my sweet, sweet Mouse. And don’t tell me you don’t want it, when you’re so hard for me…”

Kat enjoyed the feeling of the small penis under her fingers, more than she usually did. It was perhaps because of their Bonding or perhaps she was just imagining it, but she almost had the impression that ghost fingers were caressing her on some part of her body which didn’t exist. It was… glorious. She grinned and leant forward, letting her large breasts touching the frail body under her and enjoying the sudden stiffening of her Mouse and the way he started to shiver, as his body was taking in the stimulation she was giving him.

She enjoyed this power over him, and even the after effect of the Bond couldn’t take it from her – in fact it enhanced it, since she was better able to grasp what she was doing to him, what worked and what he liked less. She hesitated. Should she truly care about something like that? She was the dominant one, after all. Shouldn’t she be the one deciding what was good or bad for both of them? But as she looked at this petit figure who was looking up at her with his eyelids half-closed as he experienced great pleasure, she realized that it was a moot point.

She could set the pace, helm this ship, but she didn’t need to inflict on him ting he didn’t like to be dominant, to be above. It was a strange revelation, one she would never had if they hadn’t tried this Deep Bonding, she realized. Perhaps it should have shaken her, and in fact she felt a shiver ran her spine as she reminded the loss of her individuality, something so anathema to what MAJORS were, but she focused on her Mouse. No matter what happened, she knew he was able to help her deal with it the best way she could.

She grinned as she shifted over his body, setting her pelvis right above his now hardened cock. She said nothing, and Mouse himself didn’t even try to speak, barely gasping as she allowed him inside herself. She straddled his whole waist and hips with such a ease that she was by now sitting around him and mounting him at the same time, which was obviously normal but felt like a show of force. Of course she could allow him to pursue his dreams, she was not threatened by it anymore. That she had ever felt a little afraid of it seemed ludicrous now.

She tilted her head backward as she started to bounce on his shaft. It was all an art, to do so without letting the small thing escape the confines of her pussy, but she had grown talented enough to never let it slip out of her since they had started dating. She ground him into the carpet as she started to increase her pace, and he started t moan and whimper. And she had to bite her lips to not do the same as the phantom sensations heightened her own pleasure. She couldn’t be too loud, not with her mother probably ready to pounce back at the slightest scream or yell…

“You’re too fast” he whimpered suddenly and she chuckled softly, caressing the side of his face.

“No I don’t… I’m doing at just the right rhythm for both of us, and you know it. You’re just a little overwhelmed by all we have gone through today” she replied, her voice surprisingly steady even to her ears, considering what she was doing. “No, hush my delicious little Mouse. Let your Kat enjoy herself a little, or I may have to scratch you” she added with a wicked smile.

“Okay… as long as you know what you’re doing!”

“When have I ever not known what I am doing?” she asked him, rolling her eyes funnily.

“When you went for the Deep Bond?”

Ouch. An arrow in the heart. She grinned but the heart wasn’t here. She had given him ammunition for times like that with her obsession. But it wasn’t necessarily a bad thing, she decided. She’d probably need some reminder to be more cautious in the future. In the here and now however, she just wanted to exorcize her fears in one long love-making session, which would involve more sex and less talk. Something she knew her Mouse wouldn’t struggle with, considering how silent he usually was when they did that.

She groaned as she tried to find a more stimulating position, without rushing things too fast. Being a Minor, she knew that Mouse wouldn’t be able to keep his load in for too long and that he usually went limp after one. But being a Minor, she knew she could always command him to get hard through the Bond and he’d do so… but today, she didn’t feel like Bonding with him during sex. The phantom sensations of her own body pressing on herself because of their recent experience was quite enough for her. When things would have settled, sure, but no Bond right now was her new rule.

She grazed his body with her fingers, doing her best to ignore the sensation of her own skin being caressed so at the exact same time, at the exact same spot. She let her fingers dance on him, until those of her right hand settled on his left nipple. She considered the possibilities only a second or so, before gently pinching it. Immediately, they both let out a gasp and a moan. She pressed on, undaunted, and her left hand snaked its way behind his head, lifting it slightly and starting to massage his hair, and the skull beneath.

She let go of his nipple – or was it hers? – and put her right hand behind his back, pinching his skin here and there in the process. Then, as he expected it the less, she let herself fall on the side and lifted him up in the same movement. In a moment, she was the one laying on the floor and her Mouse on top of her. But she made sure he was pressed into her body, his breathing ragged now as his mouth was pushed against the taunt skin of her upper belly, just below her tits. She let go of his head and grinned, as she tried to push her breasts closer to his head.

“Can you try to nibble at those babe?” she asked him. “Without getting out of me, of course!”

“I… I can try, I guess…” he mumbled as he she felt him shifting beyond the wall of her breasts, which hid him from her view. “But I’ll be a little hard.”

“That’s fine, it’s not the only thing which is hard right now” she purred.

He gasped and stuttered, and this time she couldn’t help herself. She laughed wholeheartedly, and she doubted that anyone outside the room would have realized that she was fucking her boyfriend. He was just so innocent and prude! They were having sex and a little innuendo made him go all bothered! It would have never happened with a MAJOR boyfriend, but Kat knew that it was the main reason she favored her Mouse over a stronger, wilder stallion. That and the fact that she loved the tenderness afterwards, even if she would die before stating it out loud, even to him.

She growled when she felt his little hands on her firm breasts. He was trying to bring those closers to his face so he could indeed nibble them. It was an admirable effort, but probably one doomed to fail. Sure, she had perky breasts and they were large, but not that large. At best he would be able to snap his teeth a mere centimeter away from them. At worst, they would remain quite far away compared to his face. But his attempts to succeed satisfied Kat just as much as if he had managed to put his delicious little teeth into her nipples.

She started to lift her ass and hips from the ground, and as expected, Mouse yelped and stopped moving, until she herself ceased to do so. She parted her breasts, which were now falling toward her face and thus quite far from her boyfriend’s face. He looked down at her and she raised an eyebrow cockily, daring him to say something. Instead, he frowned and then bit directly into the taunt skin of her belly. She gasped and then purred. The position was quite uncomfortable but it was also funnily provocative and she loved the way he swayed when she shifted her hips this way and that.

“I don’t think I’ll be able to stay like that for long” suddenly said Mouse, and she rolled her eyes in answer.

“Yeah, because you’re the one with the precarious position! Seriously Jordan, sometimes I feel as if you don’t put enough of you in this! You should try to move your hips more.”

“I… what? Oh” he mumbled, his eyes bulging and his face darkening as he blushed – but he did try to move his hips, even if it was also a losing battle for him.

With a grin, Kat stopped to maintain her posture and her ass fell back on the floor loudly. She winced. She hadn’t taken into account that her mass meant that such a move would obviously hurt a little. Thankfully, Mouse was groping her hard so he wouldn’t fall from her, and it meant that he moved just wildly enough to almost send her over the edge when his dick hit her g-spot while he didn’t even try. Kat’s breathing accelerated and she let whined, shifting on the ground, and forcing her lover to grope her even more to maintain his perch.

Finally, she calmed down a little and resumed her more mundane pace. Then, after perhaps a minute or two more, she heard him whining, felt him tensing and her whole body relaxed to accept his seed. He panted and grunted as he released it, and once more she was vaguely surprised and amused by the difference between her quiet Mouse and the MAJOR lovers she had had over the years. Those were loud and talkative, while Jordan was so discreet he almost seemed ashamed of his own reactions, or just not confident enough.

They lay there, on the floor, her breathing slightly faster than usual and her boyfriend truly panting – almost so much she started to worry about his asthma. Had she been too inconsiderate? After the Deep Bonding it was obvious he’d have sequels even if they were quite different from hers. Perhaps she shouldn’t have fucked him, perhaps his body hadn’t recouped enough strength and he was now struggling to breathe? But as her worries grew, his wheezing faded and he breathed normally again, to her relief. She caressed his hair, enjoying the sensation of his curly locks on her fingers, the way they clang to them.

“I’m sorry that I finished so quickly” he mumbled into her belly. “Perhaps we should Bond so I may please you better?” he then asked, after a moment of silence.

“It won’t be necessary tonight” she whispered back, extending her caress to his neck and upper back. “I’m fine as it is. Let us enjoy this day, okay? Just like that.”

He didn’t answer and as she wiggled to try and get a better view on him, pushing her breasts away to see him, she discovered that he had fallen asleep. He must have been drained – in more way than one! she thought, which made her chuckle softly. Kat shifted on the ground. It wasn’t uncomfortable per se, but suddenly the patience to have moved to the bed before fucking him seemed like a far better idea. But hindsight was always 20/20 and she couldn’t just lift him and bring him to bed to stay with him and watch over his sleep.

“What will I do with you, my little Mouse” she mumbled as she considered her options.

She didn’t feel like going to sleep, not yet. It wasn’t that her body – or mind – wasn’t tired, but more so that she wasn’t in the mental state to sleep. A part of her dreaded the possibility of very real nightmares based on the experience of the loss of individuality in the Deep Bonding. She hoped that if it happened she wouldn’t scream for real, but if it did… She already knew that her mother would bother her the next morning to know more about this nightmare and why she had screamed. She had to prepare convincing lies and she couldn’t afford a second bout of nightly terror if she wanted to convince her that all was right.

She drifted to sleep nonetheless, so slowly she didn’t even realized it. At first her eyelids were just a bit heavy and she closed them for a moment, then reopened them when she felt she was falling asleep. But the second time, she couldn’t do that again, and she found herself dreaming. It wasn’t an unpleasant dream, nor a pleasant one really. It was more an amorphous mass of swirling colors and sensations, and strangely enough she knew she was dreaming. She did nothing to shape it however, curious about the work of her subconscious after the events of the day.

The shapeless world didn’t truly change around her as she waited, the many colors forming and dissolving all around her. But the light intensified and she had to close her eyes. She felt washed by this radiance, as if her fears and worried were burned away from her. In what felt seconds but may well have been hours outside of the dream, her horror at the loss of her individuality was subsumed. It wasn’t entirely erased, she still had the jitters remembering that experience, and even in the dream she felt it affecting her.

But she was now able to look at the whole experience more serenely. Yes, it had been so different, on such a magnitude, from anything her psyche had ever experienced that it was obviously disturbing. But she had gained insight in herself doing so. Nothing revolutionary but still something, and it made the whole experience worth it. She understood why MAJORS of old described it as some sort of mystical illumination, it certainly fitted the bill. She just wasn’t sure all of them were really honest when they described its effects on them.

She relaxed and drifted deeper into sleep. If she continued dreaming she didn’t remember it when she woke up the next morning. She had turned into her sleep and her Mouse was now stuck underneath her. He didn’t seem worse to wear however, sleeping with his head against one of her voluminous breasts. Kat smiled and decided that she could wait before getting up. He was so cute that she didn’t want to wake him up just yet. She didn’t want to start the day just yet, in fact. She was refreshed but staying in bed seemed more appealing than usual.

She felt Mouse stirring a little against her as she shifted, but she cooed him back to sleep. It was better to have him like that for the time being. She looked around at the rays of the sun playing with the dust in the air. It was the first day of a new life for her. She didn’t want to hide who she was anymore. She didn’t want to just throw all her past efforts away however. She was certain she could find a balance between the two. She just needed to think about it – but another day. Right now, she was glad to just lay there.

“Kat?” asked her boyfriend, his voice barely over a whisper.

“Yes?”

“What do we do now? I mean…”

“I know what you mean Jordan” she replied softly, shushing him gently by cuddling him a tad more. “We do what we want to do, together, and we live the lives we are meant to live, true to ourselves.”

“Even if it makes your mother angry?”

“Especially if it makes my mother angry” she grinned.

THE END