Characters: Queen Isabella, Fallon, Countess Olivia, Kadaj, Lucilla, Cara, Adam, Malkav, Narsis
“Something’s wrong,” Isabella said as she watched the tournament below from her cushiony seat in the royal box section. “Why aren’t those Men getting squashed?”
“Looks like your female ‘warriors’ aren’t as strong as you once thought,” Olivia smirked.
Lucilla and Cara entered the room with Adam and Malkav standing with their chests puffed out on Cara’s palm, trying to look tall.
Isabella glanced over at them. “Lucilla, go see what’s wrong out there. This battle isn’t going the way I want it to!”
“Your Highness,” Lucilla interrupted. “Sir Malkav and Sir Adam would like to speak to you.”
“What?”
Cara held up her palm, revealing the two men.
“Oh, you can just toss them in the waste basket over there,” said Isabella with a wave of her hand. “Then go see why the arena isn’t covered in blood.”
“Um, they’re here to speak to you,” Lucilla said, trying again. “They have something important to say.”
Leaning back in her chair, Isabella sighed. “Can’t they see I’m very busy looking pretty here? Don’t they know it’s very rude to bother a queen while she’s eating? Who are they and what do they want?”
Stepping forward, Cara gently placed Malkav and Adam on the long table and fell back behind Lucilla. The men were silent for a moment. They were standing next to an apple that loomed over them like some great boulder. They stepped back from it, tripping over the edge of Isabella’s plate and hitting their heads against its cold surface. Gulping, and now on their backs, they stared up at the queen, who only looked down at them in disgust.
“I was trying to eat, you know,” Isabella said.
“We w-won’t be long,” Adam swallowed.
“Will you be staying on my plate for long?”
“N-no. Of course not, Your Highness.” He jumped to his feet. “Come on, Malkav, get up!”
Malkav grabbed Adam’s hand and pulled himself up. Together, they stared up at the queen as she took another look at them and scrunched her nose. She pushed her plate away.
“My name is Sir Malkav,” Adam said. “I mean, Sir Adam. I mean, uh, I…I… Can I have a bite of that apple?”
“No.”
“Of course, I was just—”
“Did you want something?”
“We wanted to speak to you,” Malkav said. “It concerns you, this kingdom, and…Gena.”
“Ah, my new best friend! Have you met her?”
“Yes. Unfortunately, we have met.”
“I see…” Isabella said and then she sighed. “Well, I suppose I should be polite and introduce you to everybody at the table, even if you are worthless of being acknowledged.” She pointed to her left. “This is my courier, Fallon, and next to her is my not-so-good-looking cousin, Olivia, and her pet freak.”
“He’s not a pet,” Olivia said calmly. “He’s my friend and his name is Kadaj, you feces-haired twit.”
“Whatever, Whorella…” Her eyes returned to the men on her table. “So, Sir Murloc and Sir Dum-Dum, what did you want to tell me about my new best friend? If I don’t kill you first, you might get to speak to her. She’ll be back when this round of the tournament is over.”
Malkav shook his head. “Your Highness, we came to warn you about Gena. She’s not to be trusted. Her intentions are purely evil and self-seeking. If she told you otherwise, then she was lying.”
“That’s a pretty tall accusation for such a little guy. Obviously you have yet to learn your place in my kingdom. You see, here, I am the great big ruler and you’re something like a worm, only not as cute. You’re more like a toad covered in warts. Or maybe you’re just a wart—a tiny, ugly wart that won’t go away. Do you think I can make you go away?”
“I don’t think you want us to go away,” Adam said boldly. “I think you want to listen to us, for the safety of your kingdom. Gena is sure to try to overthrow you.”
Isabella cooed. “Aren’t they precious, Fallon? Speaking to me as if their opinions mattered. Haven’t you heard, boys? In my kingdom, there’s no thing as freedom of speech.”
“Perhaps we should hear them out,” Fallon suggested. “You have to admit that Gena was pretty eager to get on your good side. And she is one of the Forsaken…”
“Ugh! You’re just like Mother. You just can’t accept the fact that I have friends who like to live dangerously.”
“She’s a Necromancer. She sleeps in graveyards and has sex with skeletons for fun.”
“She’s just misunderstood. Now… Lucilla! Get that sword out of your ass and go see why those Men aren’t squashed yet! Cara, go with her. I will not have my day ruined by a bunch of incompetent Paladins!”
“As you wish, Your Highness,” Lucilla bowed and disappeared out the doorway with Cara.
Sighing, Isabella put her elbows on the table—nearly crushing Adam—and hid her face in her hands. “I am so tired of everybody thinking this world does not revolve around me. Don’t I do everything for the people of my kingdom? Don’t I deserve the best?”
“Of course you do,” Fallon said, rubbing her shoulder.
“Then why is everybody against me?”
“They’re not, Isabella.”
“I want those…those…things out of here.”
Fallon’s eyes landed on Malkav and Adam. “I’m sorry, I’m going to have to ask you to leave. The Queen is not feeling well.”
“She’s faking it,” Olivia said, taking a bite of chicken from her fork. “She did the same thing in school every time she got a grade she didn’t like until she realized she could have the teacher beheaded.” She tore off another small piece of chicken and plopped it behind her tiara for Kadaj to eat.
“I want her out of here too!” Isabella hissed.
“She’s your cousin” Fallon tried to say, but Isabella slammed her fists against the table. The apple next to Malkav rolled off the table and fell on Narsis’ head, who jumped up, looking around wildly.
“Look!” Adam whispered to Malkav. “It’s Narsis. He’ll know how to get home.”
“And get this thing out of here too!” Isabella screamed, kicking at Narsis with the sharp toes of her crystal slippers. She only hit him a couple of times, but it was enough to cut through his tough goblin skin and make him bleed. He yelped and ran for the door until his leash snapped and sent him flying back into the chair leg.
Isabella screamed again, hurling her plate down at Narsis. It shattered against his back. “You’re all so pathetic! I own you all—every one of you! You will listen to me!” She grabbed another plate and another and another, chucking them down at Narsis again and again until she fell back in her chair in hysterical laughter.
Narsis was buried under broken glass. “…I hate my life…”
“And they call me crazy,” Olivia said softly, returning to her chicken.
Isabella was drowning in red tears of laughter. “Every…body belongs to me. And they can’t do anything about it. This…this is so awesome. I own everything. Everything. Everything! You and you and you and you and everything! Obey me, puppets!” She doubled over, thrashing her feet in the air.
Malkav and Adam looked at each other.
“She does this all the time,” Olivia said. “Just ignore her like the rest of us.” She stuck her thumb in her mouth, twisting it around to get the teriyaki sauce off. “Mmm, better yet, you should probably get out of here before she decides to behead you. That can be such a dreadful ending to your day.”
“Right,” Malkav said. “Let’s go, Adam. At least we tried to warn her.”
But before they could go anywhere, Isabella’s arm slammed down in front of them like a pale wall of flesh. “I don’t think so. Perhaps you just missed my little speech, being stupid and deaf and all, but you belong to me now. At least, until Gena gets here. Then we’ll see what she wants to do with a couple of slandering worms like you.”
Giantess World
