Audrey had to cry it out for a good hour before she could take her office out of private mode, then get actual work done. She would constantly look in on Caleb, making sure he was provided for and getting the absolute best medical care. A couple of times Dr. Lemon wanted to do something crazy, or move on. She made sure he knew that Caleb was his one and only patient and he was to give him his utmost attention. Finally, it was time to go home and did so.

Audrey went to her home, took a shower to rinse off the work from her, then got ready and headed over to her second home. It wasn’t really her second, but it had been since the ordeal with Caleb. Rachel hadn’t been back to work after Caleb almost died when she came to see him. The idea that even her voice alone could cause so much pain to Caleb did not do her any favors.

Audrey knew that Caleb was always the one to ground Rachel. Even before they were in a relationship, he knew just what to say and what to ask of her to get her to come down from her moods. Even when they thought he was… well while he was accused of what he was, he was her focus and she could concentrate very well. Now that he was gone from her life, she was lost and in a dark place. So Audrey would go over and spend time with her daughter every day, making sure she was not getting too low.

She got to the house and used her key to enter, giving the door a quick knock to let Rachel know she was coming in. She entered, shut the door, and looked around. Things were pretty much the way they had left them that night. It was like a shrine to what had happened. She’d tried to clean it up, but Rachel wouldn’t have it. She was punishing herself and making sure she remembered what happened. The area smelled of B.O. and vomit, as both of them had the same way of dealing with the thought of what they did, which was violently hurling into a waste pale and/or toilet.

She navigated through the house and into Rachel’s room as she lay in bed, curled up in it. She hadn’t showered since she got back from the station the day after Caleb was admitted. Audrey was only able to get her to get into her comfy clothes before she was basically bed bound. She barely got up to use the restroom. Audrey had to bring her the food she ate, most of which came up when she thought about things. As much as she wanted to get her past this, to tell her it wasn’t healthy to be effected this way… who was she kidding, she was just as bad, just had a purpose. She could dictate how Caleb was being treated, that was her purpose at the moment. Rachel didn’t have that outlet, so she stayed there, beyond depressed.

“Honey? You awake?” Her mother asked, rubbing her through her blanket and trying to comfort her.

“Mom…?” Rachel asked, as if not believing she was there.

“I’m here sweetheart… I’m here…” She soothed, bringing Rachel’s hair out of her face. “I have news, if you would like to hear it?”

“Are we at war yet?” She asked, knowing what was at stake but not caring at the moment. In her mind, they deserved it. The dead cyber terrorist known as Alison was right, they didn’t deserve to be at peace for what they did. If there was a war, she would lay down for the first person that wanted to end her.

“No, nor will we be.” He Mother answered gently.

“What do you mean?” Rachel asked, turning her head and looking at her Mother. The only way to prevent it was for Caleb to enter his code into the system. Even then, there was a very high percentage chance that he would upload the files anyway. That is what she would do, if she was in his position. So what made this no longer an issue?

“He woke up. Caleb’s awake…” Her Mother reported. Before she could push another strand of hair out of Rachel’s face, she bolted up and was at attention, looking her Mother straight in the eye as if nothing else mattered.

“Please Mother, tell me everything…” begged Rachel. She had been in nightmares and a downward spiral of regret and depression. She couldn’t stop looking back on the events that led her here, and what rendered Caleb in his current state. She would love to blame part of it on her Mother, but she was more to blame than anyone living. She had broke him, worse than any and she knew it. She thought about it, that night when the lies stopped and she was confronted with the truth. They both thought about it.

(7 Days ago, after Caleb was eaten by Rachel)

Rachel had just left her Mother’s office after they got an alert that Caleb had been using his ID. They’d been talking about what she had planned. They were so joyful about such a means to end him, they were even planning a party. Audrey didn’t really like that Rachel had let herself go for so long, but knew it was for a good cause. They both agreed, Rachel was about to win. Caleb would be dead by the end of the night, he would beg for it and Rachel would slowly digest him. The only regret Audrey had was that she didn’t think of it first. Then again, she wouldn’t be able to do something like let her appearance get to the level Rachel had.

One thing though that everyone agreed on in the GPF when the unprofessionalism Rachel was showing in her aesthetic value was that she was doing it to punish Caleb. He had the hate of the whole world, and all they had to say was his name and Rachel could ask or do pretty much whatever she wanted. Some made her tell them what she was doing as payment, just so they could dwell in his paid justice a little bit.

Audrey was doing some last minute file organizing on her office computer when it went blank. She did some basic troubleshooting and even unplugged the thing to get it to reboot correctly. That is when it turned back on. She was irritated, as she hadn’t saved the last thing she was working on, but then grew concerned as the video began playing.

“Johnson! Get in here! Someone is hacking my computer!” She exclaimed into the intercom located on her desk to reach her assistant.

“It’s not just yours Ma’am, seems all of the GPF’s computers are being controlled by someone from the outside.” He reported, obviously trying to fix the problem.

“Could this be what Caleb was doing when he used his ID?” She asked.

“Who knows, anything is possible for that bug…! Rachel hasn’t killed him yet…?” Johnson asked through the intercom.

“Oh, he should be well on his way to getting there by now. We need to…” Audrey said, then was caught by the start of Alison talking. “W… what is this?”

She, along with every other person in front of any screen they had, watched the same video that Caleb had seen. She however, the longer it was on, the more horror struck she became. Giantesses were not usually ones to be shocked, and if there were their recovery rate was very quick. But she had her mouth open and her hand covering it. The longer the video went on, the more she couldn’t believe what she was seeing. She so much wanted to look away, but couldn’t for the life of her do so. She saw the evidence laying out before her, the video of her own actions and that of Rachel flowing before her. By the end of the video, the screens went black, then rebooted their normal operations.

The following 5 minutes, there was not a single noise in the entire GPF network. You could hear a human sized pin drop from across the compound. Then all hell broke loose.

“Johnson!!!” Audrey yelled into the intercom.

“Already on it Ma’am! Sifting through the evidence now…” She said, then the intercom went quiet, then came to a few minutes later. “…Preliminary analysis says it is authentic. This Alison was telling the truth… oh no!”

“What is it?” Audrey asked, needing more information than she was being given.

“If she is telling the truth, then Caleb is innocent. Wasn’t Rachel on her way to…?” she started then was interrupted.

“Call Rachel right now, use the emergency number and tell her what is going on. I will go over there myself to make sure he is alive. Have every department drop what they are doing and look into this. I want a complete and accurate report by the time I get back. No one is going home tonight. Is that clear?” She ordered and asked as she gathered her things and headed out her door.

“Yes Ma’am!” Said Johnson through the intercom and it barely reached Audrey’s ears as she was already halfway out the door by the time she responded.

“No, no, no, no… This isn’t happening. Please be ok. I will give anything, just please be ok.” She murmured to herself as she forgot all decency and started running down the hall and out the building. She cared for nothing else but getting to her target. She got in her car, turned on the lights and siren, and zoomed towards her daughter’s house. In very little time, she was there. She would not wait, she got her emergency key out and in record time unlocked and opened the door. “Oh no… What have we done?”

She saw her daughter in her room, naked, sleeping. She ran over to her and began shaking her awake. She was a heavy sleeper, but this was not the time for this.

“Mom? What are you…?” Rachel asked, missing the fact that she was naked in front of her Mother. She was beyond tired.

“Where is he? Please tell me you didn’t eat him already.” Her Mother asked in a panic. It took Rachel a few seconds to realize that her Mother was very worked up and not many things could do that. She sat up and looked at her.

“Uh yeah… but I don’t think he is digested yet. Took that pill we talked about. Probably pretty far gone though… You aren’t going to make me puke him up are you. I actually did it! I got him to beg for his death. He deserves…” She answered and started to rant.

“He was framed Rachel.” Her Mother interrupted, not willing to hear anymore. They didn’t have the time.

“W-what?” Rachel asked, not understanding.

It wasn’t hard to process why she was so skeptical. Even Audrey was skeptical, and she’d seen the proof and video. But without all that, giantesses were known to being never wrong. Framing someone or not, their system was not one that could be tricked. One of the only people capable was stewing in Rachel’s stomach. There was simply no way, as far as Rachel knew, for someone to trick their system enough to frame someone. But, if her Mother of all people was saying so, than it had to be true.

“He was framed. There was a cyber Terrorist, a real piece of work, framed him. She even put a process in place to record everything we did to him and release it and all the evidence if he doesn’t log in himself and put his password in to stop it. We are talking about enough dirt to start a war with the humans.” Audrey said very quickly.

“How is that possible? Mom, he was guilty. We know this. We proved it. How…?” Rachel asked, still a bit groggy but in denial of what she was being told.

“RACHEL!!! Just trust me! Caleb, your brother and boyfriend, my son, is innocent. He never said he was guilty, and we have proof for it. He is now dying in your stomach for a series of crime he never committed. You need to get him out before he dies!!! Caleb is innocent, and he is dying. Get him out!!! NOW!!!” her mother yelled at her.

“Oh goodness… No, this isn’t possible… I…” Rachel said, then her hand went to her stomach where she could feel Caleb moving, he was still alive… but probably not for long.

She could feel him, perks of the pill she took, and his movements were very faint. She looked up to meet her Mother’s eyes, both of them looking in horror to another. Without another word, Rachel got up, knocking her Mother onto the floor in the process, then ran to the bathroom. She didn’t wait as she reached into her mouth and started initiating her gag reflex. Through her temporarily enhanced senses in her stomach she could feel him. It took a few tries, but he was being brought up… but not all of him. She didn’t have time to figure that out. She just hoped in her desperate state that she wasn’t too late.

Audrey had run after her and got a human sized isolation chamber. She had picked one up on her way out of her office. She knew she might need it. They were designed to keep people inches from death alive in a sort of electrified DNA fluid. The raw DNA inside would interact with the subject and keep them alive until aid could be administered. This was usually deployed when a giantess accidentally stepped on a human and they actually survived… or something like that. The giantess could then take the human in the chamber to the nearest or best facility in the chamber, and they would have a chance.

Rachel hacked and puked until she felt him slide out of her throat and into her hands, as she was using them like a strainer to make sure he didn’t fall in the toilet with the rest of the bile. She finally got him and in an instant her Mother grabbed him into the chamber and started its processes. They watched as the light on the inside blinked red. They didn’t dare breathe. If the blinking stopped and turned red, that meant the subject was too far gone and was dead… over so close to it that it was a mercy to kill them then and there. If it turned yellow, then they were borderline… seconds away from death once revived but hope remained. Green was preserved and had a very high chance at full recovery. The red blinking light stopped, then turned to yellow. The let out a breath, Audrey carefully carried the chamber to the counter and waited for emergency response to show up. Once deployed, these chambers would send out a signal to be picked up, the worse off the patient the more priority. Caleb would be picked up very shortly.

“Get a robe on, we will be having company shortly.” Audrey told her daughter. She however couldn’t take her eyes off the little human man in the chamber.

She heard the water running and the toilet flush. She then heard the sounds of Rachel getting dressed, then was joined as they waited for the Emergency Response. They both now stared at the little dying human man in the chamber. His body was red and almost all his skin was removed, showing the bloody flesh underneath. His penis and balls were missing, as was one of his legs… that had looked like to be bleeding heavily. On the display, it showed that his blood loss was critical, massive trauma, multiple amputations, Multiple internal injuries, Multiple broken bones, and a whole slew of other injuries. Not to mention his body wasn’t nourished properly, so he had a whole bunch of diseases that they couldn’t even pronounce, no doubt do to his recent diet. His chest rose and fell in rapid succession indicating that his breathing was very rapid and his heart was ready to give out. The DNA liquid was keeping him alive, but his body was in a bad way.

“Mom…?” Rachel asked, they both took their eyes off Caleb and looked each other in the eye. “…what just happened?”

“He was telling the truth…” Her Mother said, realizing it as she spoke. “… Rachel, we were so wrong. So very wrong.”

Rachel couldn’t stand, or even sit on the stool she was on for that matter. She collapsed and pushed herself back against the far wall of the kitchen as she looked in horror at the chamber holding the human she’d just had in her stomach. Her brain was having difficulty processing what she was being told and what it could comprehend. Worse of all, if Caleb was really innocent, than she was unable to understand the torture she just put him through, for months.

Audrey was torn between what to do. Should she go to her daughter that was on the verge of a mental breakdown, or stay with her son that was inches from death. Luckily, she didn’t have to wait long to choose as a flying jet of a emergency response team entered the home with lights flashing and sirens blaring. They didn’t even wait for permission. After seeing the yellow lighted chamber, they attached it to the underside of the vehicle they were in, then took off at high speeds. That left Audrey and Rachel in the house. Audrey went over to the door, shut it, then over to Rachel.

Her movements were ones that she barely registered. She didn’t even know what she was doing. She looked down at Rachel as she was losing it, then slunk down and got beside her. She reached out, grabbed her, and pulled her into her arms. Rachel just acted on instinct and hugged into her Mother. At that moment, as the adrenaline of the situation ended, they realized the impact of what just happened. They both didn’t cry, they didn’t yell, they didn’t even whimper, they just stayed silent as they held each other. They really didn’t know what to do, or what they did to their so called family.

They would stay that way for a while, then got dressed and went to the hospital where Caleb was. Audrey had him moved to the best Hospital in the world, the GPF main Hospital under their top mind, Doctor Lemon. He was always a pain in the ass, but he knew his stuff. If Caleb had any hope of living, mush more recovering enough to stop a world war, than Doctor Lemon was his best shot.

The day after that, Rachel cleaned herself up and they both went to visit him. Rachel’s intension was to make sure he got better. The more she learned about the situation, especially after watching the video and going over the evidence herself, the more she hated herself and resolved to get him better. If it was the last thing she did, she would make sure he lived so she could… She didn’t know what she could do to make up for this… but damn it she would try. She was so focused, and so hopeful when they saw him move, she couldn’t help but address him.

“Caleb, are you there?” She asked him softly.

That hospital rooms for mixed races, like the one he was in, allowed for both Giantess and human doctors and visitors. How? By having an observation area beside it, kind of like a room on a shelf… but more advanced. The “Shelf” would still have its own room, so Giantesses would still need to enter, but it was also private enough to restrict if necessary.

The moment she spoke, his machines began going off. His vitals were going crazy and he was about to die again. Doctor Lemon and the others sprang into action, giving him shots of a few highly effective but also highly expensive “Miracle drugs” made to stabilize and subdue patients when the panicked during procedures. This reaction made Rachel back off, her confidence on what she had to do was shaken.

“How long will he be like this?” Asked Audrey, as she saw him completely wrapped up and barely alive. She had instructed him to spare no effort or expense to keep him alive and get him better as soon as possible. She made sure he understood, without saying anything, that this was his only concern. A few statements like “World War” and “Global Peach” Had ensured this.

Again, at the sound of her voice, his vitals started to hit the floor. Doctor Lemon pumped him with more of the drug than, when he stabilized, turned to the two women. Before he could say anything Caleb started shouting as much as possible in pain and anguish. The tone of his voice was like a scream of a ghost or a waling radiation victim.

“Just let me die! Let me go! Kill me! Why won’t you just let me die! I begged just like you asked! No more pain! Just let me die! Please! KILL ME!” He continued until the drug started working, then settled down and was quiet again. His reaction to them was so strong, that he reopened some of his wounds and the doctors started working to get him under control.

“With respect, you two need to leave. Your very voices are throwing him into panic. For whatever reason, he registers your voices as threat status. Any more reactions like that and I might not be able to save him!” He explained, then went to assist the other doctors.

This hit them both very hard, but Rachel most of all. She had gotten close to him, then was devastated when he was convicted of the crimes. She was so angry she didn’t even let him defend himself, then tortured and tried to kill him. Now that she knew better and was hell bent on making it right, her very voice could kill him? He felt so unsafe around her that he begged for death?

She and her Mother left as directed, to which Rachel walked a bit, then turned to her Mother.

“What do we do?” Rachel asked.

“Nothing we can do. I’ll keep an eye on him, make sure he gets the best care. You should go home and take care of yourself. If he survives this, we might get another chance. But we are just not right for him right now.” Her Mother said, both to Rachel and herself.

“You’re right Mom. Just, let me know if something happens.” Rachel pleaded.

“Will do.” Her Mother said, then they went off.

As her Mother went to work, Rachel went home. She looked around and saw the different things around her house that made it all too real for her. She walked over to the cage she kept him in. In the pan, there was still his crap that she stopped removing to make him smell his own filth when she actually let him sleep. There were blood and other stains around the bars where he slept. She knew the were from the sores he used to get when sleeping. She loved to make him clean and use harsh chemicals when she saw open sores like that. She turned away from it, wanting nothing more than to bash the cage into hundreds of little tiny pieces.

She went over to the kitchen to get something to eat. She opened the fridge, and saw in the drawer an area by the lemons and onions where she used to keep him when she felt like he could use some cooling off. She also liked putting him in there when her sex juices were on him, making them harden and itch. If he was in there long enough to turn a little blue it was a plus. She slammed the refrigerator door shut, losing interest in food.

She then went to her room and removed her clothes. She went into the bathroom and then looked at herself in the mirror. She hadn’t realized just how much she let herself go. Her teeth were yellow, her body was hairy and dirty. Her hair was mangled and overall she didn’t look at all appealing. She shook her head, imagining that this is what Caleb saw every day, and she forced him to please her like this. No wonder why he never got a boner when she was in the room, naked or not. She then thought about how she threatened to cut his penis off if he ever did, and the fact that he had lost it anyway in her stomach

She then sat on the toilet to relieve herself and looked over to see the same roll of toilet paper she’d put there a few months ago. She remembered using him from that point to wipe herself with, then threw him in the toilet, making him swim and move around in her filth. She couldn’t take it anymore, and just sat there on the toilet and started crying. She leaned forward and hugged her knees and legs as she cried. The more she cried the harder she squeezed and soon she was balling her eyes out and hugging her legs so hard that they were losing circulation.

She thought about how he had tried to tell her he was innocent, even succeeded a few times getting his side completely out… well not all of it, but enough that she could’ve looked into it on his behalf. Enough to stop torturing him for a few days at least. She remembered laughing at him, as if the thought of him being innocent was the most ludicrous thing in the world. She’d tried to force him to admit he did it. They had promised each other, long before they started dating, that they would never lie to each other no matter how bad things got. She looked back and found that she had started lying and betraying his trust from the moment she’d seen the fake evidence about him. He, on the other hand, had never lied. Even with her doing horrors to him, threatening him, and everything else… he never gave in, he never lied to her.

There was many more things that she thought about as she sat there, her legs long becoming numb both from her squeezing them and sitting so long on the toilet. She didn’t even remember if she’d relieved herself or not. But she then thought about him confiding in her. Both before and after the started their relationship. He’d told her everything, things that no living person would admit, he’d told her those things.

He’d told her about his past, and even threw up a few times when he remembered the things he was forced to do. He’d told her his passions, which eventually led to him telling her about his feelings towards her. He’d told her about crimes he committed because of his biological parents and they had cried when he’d told her that she and Audrey were the ones to render judgement on his biological parents, and some of his guilty extended family. He’d told her about his passions and deepest fears. Lastly he told her about his sexual preferences and fetish choices, including being attracted to her as a giantess, insertion, crush, body exploration, a host of other giantess related content, and of course vore. The last one they had some major talks about, mainly because of the society pressure of that being extremely bad. However, they had gotten past it and even used it as fuel to appease each other. She even started thinking about it and she made sure he knew that it was their secret, never to be shared or used against him. Because of the cultural taboo on in, if it ever got out he would be digging himself out of that hole for a while.

As she thought of all the things that he shared with her, confided in her, and her promises to him about what he shared, she noticed that she didn’t keep a single one of her promises. She’d used all of his fears against him, turned all of his fantasies into nightmares, and lastly told everyone that would listen about it, especially his vore thoughts.

“What kind of Monster am I?” She asked herself as she cried so much that her tears were making a puddle on the ground. She remembered whenever she was down and crying, Caleb would come and make her feel better. Even when she was torturing him, he would do something to get her in a better mood. This got her to cry even more, as he wasn’t there to do that anymore.

As if to answer her question, she then thought about eating him, rolling him around in her mouth. The same mouth that she had purposefully not cleaned for a while to get it as unappealing in every way she knew he would hate. She remembered the pain filled cries as she moved him around, sucked on him, and even lightly bit down on him. She remembered how good he tasted, then every once in a while she’d taste a small coppery taste. In hindsight, after seeing his condition, knew it was his eardrums shattering and his eyes being literally sucked from his head… by her.

She remembered him begging to be eaten and the absolute joy she had that she had finally broke him. She’d won and sent him down, reveling the feeling of both his taste and feeling as he slid down her throat and landed in her stomach. She remembered feeling his desperate movements and her shaking his prison in a variety of fashions whenever he wasn’t moving to get him to do so again. She pleasured herself to his movements, knowing that he would be dying inside her, and that it was finally all over. Lastly, she remembered wishing she could do this more often with him, but very happy that has now slowly and painfully digesting inside her.

With all this thought into what she’d done to him and where he ended up, she couldn’t handle it anymore. She grabbed the garbage pail she kept in the bathroom and threw up into it. She’d eaten something earlier with her Mother on her way to see Caleb. When she was done, she thought about the previous night when she’d threw him up and what he looked like, how inhuman his appearance was and how close to death he was. Legless, eyeless, skinless, partially digested, and covered in bile… enhanced by her to be even more painful to him. She threw up again as she thought about it. She couldn’t help be think on it and the things she’d done to him. Each time, she would hurl and even after she didn’t have anything more to bring up she dry heaved and.

She never made it to the shower of off the toilet. Her Mother found her like that, crying and hurling on frequent basis. Audrey had helped her move, since her legs were of little use at that point. She helped her take a bath, both of them quiet as they moved. With the warm bath soothing her legs and getting blood to flow again, Rachel was able to walk back to her bed after her bath and was dressed and laid down in it. Audrey did the Mother thing by making sure that she had everything she needed, including a garbage by her bed for when she threw up.

(Current Day)

“So he stopped the upload before the recovery agent could do anything?” Rachel asked, after her Mother had told what happened at work when Caleb had woken up.

“Yes, no hesitation. The terrorist even switched the choices, and he saw threw it and chose the one that would stop the upload. It is over now. No war, no death and destruction, the peace remains.” Her Mother reported, trying to put on a good face for Rachel, but she was barely holding back another vomit session.

“Why?” Rachel asked, not understanding.

“Why what?” Her Mother asked.

“Why would he do that? Just like that, give us exactly what we want. Our consequence for what we did to him… why would he just give in like that? I wouldn’t… I would rub it in our faces and let us kill each other. Why would he protect us like that?” Rachel asked, not understanding. She’d dug herself in a hole of misery, guilt, and regret for the last few days. She felt so lowly of herself that she wondered why she ate the food that her Mother brought her every day.

“Miranda thinks that he just wanted to be left alone. She assumed that he was appeasing us so he didn’t have to put up with our attempts at getting him to do just that. But I have a different theory.” Her Mother said, pausing before continuing. “While I agree that he is so fearful of us now, that he wants us to just go away, even to the point of giving what we want. I think that he also, genuinely, doesn’t want any more death. No more fallout to the world and definitely not a war between humans and giantess. So, he wanted to protect us, save us from ourselves. That is what I think. That sounds more like the Caleb we know, doesn’t it?”

“Yes… yes it does…” Rachel said, breaking eye contact with her Mother, dwelling on that, then her thoughts went back to how different they were and what she did to him, and then grabbed the half filled garbage and added more vomit to the mix. She gazed into the soup of bile and half digested bits of food. Her mind just saw bones and skin, as if they were Caleb to which she hurled again. She eventually put it the garbage down and collapsed in bed. She curled up in bed and cried some more. “Mom?”

“Yes sweetheart?” Audrey asked, holding in her own vomit to be supportive toward her daughter, but she might not be able to do so for very long.

“Do you think…? What do you…? Will he ever… forgive us?” She asked, not looking up to ask her question. She just cried large tears into her already soaked pillow.

This was the time that Mothers would normally say something uplifting. Something like, ‘I’m sure he will’ or, ‘he is our family, he’ll come around’. This would normally be enough to inspire hope in someone that was in a position like Rachel was in. Audrey was extremely low, her status of being Caleb’s Mother didn’t help as she kept thinking, ‘what Mother would do this to their child?’ But Rachel, with the amount of trust that Caleb and her had in each other prior, was far worse. It went further than betraying her brother, further than betraying her boyfriend or person she loved, and it went further than her charge to protect him after they freed him from his family. Neither of them could forgive themselves for what they did, but hoped that Caleb could… and both were thinking about this question. They knew Caleb had a big heart, but they also knew that after months of trying to break it, they might’ve succeeded. Still, the fact he was still protecting them, brought back a little hope… but not much. Audrey couldn’t lie about this, as they both already knew the answer.

“I don’t know Rachel… I just don’t know…” She said, feeling queasy herself. She bent forward and kissed her daughter on the forehead and added, “Get some sleep. We need to start preparing for whatever he needs of us. We can do that much at least.”

“Mom?” Rachel asked as her Mother had gotten up and almost made it to the door.

“Yes?” She asked back, needing to run to the toilet, but still supporting her daughter.

“I’m sorry…” She sobbed out.

“Me too… Me too…” She said, then left Rachel. She got a few steps down the hallway, then ran to the bathroom. She barely made it, but was able to vomit her thoughts into the toilet. The few meager pieces of food she’d been able to eat were now in the toilet.

She did the same thing as Rachel, looking in the bile as if seeing Caleb in it. It didn’t do her any favors that she had eaten a half a dairy cow, bones and all. She had been in a hurry and just popped it in. Now, its half digested flesh and bones were floating around as if it was actually Caleb. She threw up again, then let the automatic flush carry away the remains of her dinner. She slid down the toilet bowl and let its cool side sooth her head, that is until she slid all the way to the ground and she just lay there, crying herself.

She knew her answer to Rachel’s question. If she’d been in Caleb’s position, and was asked if she forgave people that did even half the things they had done to him… her answer would be, “Hell No.” She then had a dark thought, one that she hadn’t thought of before. But in her low spot, she cried a bit more, but got up. She wiped her face and bounded out of the bathroom with a purpose.

She got to the kitchen and went straight for the item she knew was there. She knew it was there, she’d put it back after all. She pulled out the drawer and saw it… the plasma knife. She picked it up and gazed at it, then shook her head and plugged it in. In very little time, its edge was glowing, then glowing blue. She gazed at the edge like one would when looking at a campfire. She remembered how she felt and looked when she was about to do this to Caleb and it steeled her nerves. She had to do this, it was the only way to live with herself.

She looked down, and saw the burned cut mark in the counter where she had cut off Caleb’s hands. She the put her own hand on the counter, right where the burn marks were and held the knife above her own wrist, ready to cut it from her body, just like she’d done to Caleb. She looked at the knife, and her wrist, then drew it closer. She could feel the heat from the blue glowing blade. She got close enough to start searing her skin, inches away from her skin.

“Just do it… just fucking do it…!” She told herself, willing herself to go through with it.

She closed her eyes, lifted the knife, the brought it down. She heard a sizzle and felt the heat as the knife’s momentum carried it through the counter and lodged in it. The knife’s safety features came into play, and the heat shut off so the plasma blade wouldn’t start the kitchen and house on fire from contact with the counter and beneath it.

She looked to see her knew stump, wondering if the adrenaline had made it not hurt at all. Only to see that she had brought it down right before her wrist. Her force had drove it through the counter and into the drawer beneath. She let go of the knife, now protruding from the counter’s top. She collapsed in the kitchen and pushed herself on her butt as far as she could from the cutting tool. She looked at it in horror, then grabbed her own wrist and hand, held it to her chest and sobbed. Her back was now against the fridge and she couldn’t believe what she almost did. She just couldn’t go through with it. Then her mind got dark again and realized, if she couldn’t go through with it on her end, how Caleb must’ve felt when she ordered him to allow her to do it.

“I don’t deserve it, nor will I accept it…” She cried to herself, responding to Rachel’s question, ‘will he forgive us?’

She held her hand and wrist and just couldn’t move. She would look up at the knife, down at her wrist, and at different parts of her body that she’d used him for. She couldn’t move enough to make it to the trash can, or move period to be honest. She just vomited where she was, what little bile coming up leaving her mouth and traveling down her shirt and pants, until resting on the floor. This hadn’t been the first time she’d puked on herself during this ordeal, but this was the first time she almost cut off her own hand. How could she help Rachel past this if she couldn’t do it herself? But she wasn’t sure if she even wanted to get past it. In her mind, she did deserve peace or happiness, not when she was so intent in taking it from someone she was supposed to love, that she did love… that she does love. She just cried more, and put her head back on the refrigerator.

“Damn it… damn it… DAMN IT!!!” She screamed, balling up her hands and slamming them into the floor beside her with such force that they caused indents in the ground and cracks in the custom designed tile. She brought her hands up to her and saw they were now bleeding from the impact and a few pieces of tile stuck in them. She didn’t even bother pulling the pieces out or stopping the bleeding. She just put them back down by her sides and said once more, “damn it…”