Chapter 18: The Sarah in the Other Room

A while later, maybe ten minutes, maybe twenty, maybe longer, Jeff was able to start moving his body again. Every movement seemed like it was in slow motion, almost like he was trying to move about underwater. His body was exhausted; he was covered in sweat, his limbs ached terribly, and every breath burned in his lungs. Even after he was able to move, it still took him about ten minutes to muster up the energy to actually stand. He reached for the crutches automatically, and used them to help him rise up. He didn’t even think about using them anymore — at this point it was second nature. 

Finally on his feet, he looked around the kitchen and into the living room. The house appeared to be empty. It was completely quiet. There was no sign of Sarah…had she left? Almost as soon as that question flashed in his mind, Jeff knew the answer was “no.” The house seemed to smile to itself as it hummed with a kind of invisible energy that had been absent during the day. She was here. 

But where was she? Jeff slowly began to walk on his crutches, bit by bit, making his way toward the living room. He looked toward the big red sofa — Sarah was nowhere to be seen. He suddenly realized that she must be in her bathroom…or maybe her bedroom. Excitement sprang up in his chest as he imagined her getting ready for bed, brushing her teeth, brushing out her hair, looking at herself in the mirror, and then seeing him and giving him a big smile, as if to say “almost ready for bed!” 

The horror of their previous exchange had almost completely evaporated from Jeff’s brain. He had been so overwhelmed by Sarah’s humiliating dirty talk, her size comparisons with him, her effortless deepthroating, and her long finger in his ass, that he had not really had time to truly appreciate what was happening to him. He had mostly been trying to unsuccessfully stave off a panic attack, and when her finger went into his ass, all bets were off — she had wiped his mind clean. 

And now, twenty or thirty or however many minutes later, he was not able to think back and experience the horror he felt in that moment. His mind had blocked out his desperate resistance, and the earnestness of his struggle against the humiliation that he did not want. The more time passed, the more it just seemed like an…intense encounter. He remembered everything that had happened, but he did not have the capacity to acknowledge that Sarah had just raped him while he was having a panic attack. Instead, his mind went somewhere else. 

‘Didn’t think I was into anal stuff,’ he thought as he crutched himself towards Sarah’s master suite. He laughed to himself. ‘Well, guess I was wrong!’ He shook his head and allowed his internal laughter to trickle out into the external world through some chuckles. ‘And of course,’ he thought, continuing to laugh to himself, ‘Sarah would be into that stuff…damn she’s kinky.’ 

Anyone who had witnessed what had happened a short time before might have been flabbergasted by Jeff’s mindset — how could he have forgotten his hopeless humiliation that had brought him to tears, even as he was forced to orgasm? How could he possibly have forgotten something so intense? But Jeff hadn’t really forgotten. Over the years, as more and more evidence built around him of his own inadequacy, his own immaturity, and his own small stature, he had developed some convenient mental habits that were always waiting in the wings to sweep in and save him from any negative feelings: anything that didn’t make him feel good, that didn’t vindicate him as an intelligent, interesting, and desirable man, he simply discounted. Anything that made him question himself and his own life choices…well, he simply swept it under the rug and carried on doing whatever it was that he was doing. That was why he had made it all the way to 28 — all the way to poor health and a bad hip through drinking, smoking, poor diet, bad sleep, and a lack of exercise — without accomplishing anything, while feeling proud of himself. 

But meeting Sarah had started to change all of that. Her behavior had forced him to look at himself for what he really was: small, weak, and submissive, both physically and mentally. And even worse, she had forced him to contend with the fact that he was actually aroused by these realities. And as she had shown time and time again, Jeff simply did not possess the ability to resist her. 

But now, in these moments of come-down, when Sarah didn’t appear to be around, Jeff could regroup and push all of the humiliation, all the submission, and all the crazy erotic desire out of his mind. What was left made him smile: he was getting the most insane blowjobs from the hottest bombshell of a girl he had ever met. Who cared that it was his old neighbor, little Sarah Helleger? Jesus Christ, had she grown up or what! And she was into him! Jeff couldn’t help it — his face spread out in a wide grin as he crutched toward the bathroom door. Who could blame her, after all? With, you know, the size of his dick and all. She wasn’t in the bathroom. Or her bedroom either. Hmmmmm….Jeff was a bit puzzled as he turned to leave the bedroom suite. Had she really left the house? 

As Jeff turned to leave Sarah’s bedroom, the only thing that really stuck in his mind was what she had said after she had left him lying on the floor…something about having “conquered” his dick? What had she meant by that? Was she saying that she wished that he was even bigger than he was? Jeff felt a little unpleasant pit in his stomach…was his cock not enough for her? He had never had such a thought, but then again, no girl had been able to deepthroat him at all, let alone as smoothly and effortlessly as Sarah had. Any trouble she had the previous night seemed to have gone away….she had said that she needed a “challenge,” right? As Jeff crutched into the living room, his brow furrowed a bit as he contemplated this problem. How could he make his dick bigger? 

And then he saw her. She was sitting at her desk, with her back to him. She had her headphones in and appeared to be intently working. Jeff stopped dead in his tracks, and any thoughts he had been having were suddenly gone. His world became only her. She had apparently changed clothes — she was wearing a baggy grey sweatshirt and tight white yoga pants, which he could see in the curves of her ass and hips that were spilling slightly over either side of her chair. She was crouched over a mass of papers on her desk that were spread out all around her. Since he was watching her, Jeff became attuned to her presence, and heard the busy scribbling of her pencil…how had he not heard that before? She had been sitting right there the whole time. 

Automatically, Jeff began to limp toward her. The closer he got, the bigger she looked in her chair. He got all the way up to her, until he was about five feet away. Sarah still hadn’t looked up, giving no indication that she knew he was there. Being this close to her, Jeff saw that Sarah’s head was actually a bit taller than his, even though she was sitting down and slightly hunched. 

A ball grew in Jeff’s throat as he gawked at her from behind. She had her hair up in a messy haphazard ponytail. He couldn’t believe it. She looked….like an overgrown college student. 

‘I guess that’s what she is!’ laughed Jeff to himself. He had never seen her in quite this way before, and it only deepened his fascination. He jumped back a bit as Sarah sat up straight suddenly, drawing her head even higher above his than it had already been. She still had her back to him, though, and after a few moments she hunched herself back down, cupping her chin in her hands as she leaned down on her forearms, evidently still focusing on her work. 

Jeff watched her for another minute or so before he started feeling awkward. He wanted to get her attention, but he also really didn’t want to disturb her. Although he didn’t know it, deep down inside, he didn’t want to disturb her because he was afraid of her. Deep down, he knew that she was some kind of threat to him, some kind of a predator that would consume him. But he couldn’t access these feelings. He had built up too much of a defense against reality.

And…it was her. Sitting down in her chair, her hair all messy, in her sweatshirt and yoga pants, hard at work, she looked more beautiful than ever. 

‘What a good student!’ Jeff suddenly thought, smiling again. ‘Look at her go!’ His mind shot back to the phone conversation she had had earlier that evening with the fourth-year med student — she had seemed so knowledgeable, so on top of it. ‘They better look out,’ thought Jeff, almost paternally, ‘she’s comin’ to get em’! Sarah’s gonna blow them all out of the water!’ He paused, laughing to himself as he fixated on the word “blow.” 

‘Well…she’ll be blowing me anyway,’ he thought, and then he saw Sarah’s huge hand extend up and begin drumming its long, long fingers on the table. The sight of her massive hand up close, and those lithe fingers drumming their red clawed nails on the table suddenly shot his mind to her face with his dick in her mouth, snarling and shaking itself back and forth rapidly. His heart stopped a moment as he let out a gasp, and he immediately broke out into another cold sweat. 

But she hadn’t heard him. And almost as soon as the memory had come, it was gone again. Jeff once again felt warmed as he regarded her. 

‘Maybe we could get married sometime,’ he thought abruptly. He let his thoughts wander…maybe they could be like those people who get married on the beach. His heart dropped a little as he imagined the wedding photos — she would be so much bigger than him, and everyone would be talking about it. His cock woke up. He realized that he was naked. Where was that blanket that she had draped over him a while back? 

‘Never mind,’ he thought, irritated at his penis for getting hard. He just wanted to daydream about him and Sarah being together. Maybe they could even have kids….oh god! What if they had a daughter!? Would she grow up to be as big as Sarah?? His dick was still growing, and Jeff was not able to suppress his sudden rage. He reached his hand through one of his crutches and grabbed his cock, holding it there and giving it a stern shake, as if to rebuke it. Why was it getting hard when he was thinking about all this stuff? After a few moments Jeff realized that he was only making himself harder, so he let himself go, bringing his eyes back up to Sarah’s neck and back. 

‘She’s just so hot,’ he thought to himself. ‘That’s why I can’t help myself around her.’ He stood there for a few more minutes, watching her read, and scribble notes, and shift her papers. It was mesmerizing…and pretty soon, he couldn’t bear it any longer. He needed her to know he was there. Gingerly, cautiously, almost like a child about to wake up his parents on a Saturday morning, Jeff approached her on his crutches, until he was literally at her elbow. Her head rose up several inches above his own. Her face was illuminated by her laptop screen, and she was typing away at her keyboard, barely visible beneath the mass of papers and scribbled notes on her desk. She still hadn’t seen him. He could feel the heat coming off her hips and thighs. He reached over and tapped her upper sweatshirt, where her the shape of her arm was just barely visible. 

She gave no indication that she had noticed him. He tried again, with the same reaction. 

“H-hi Sarah,” he said out loud, surprising himself with his courage. But she didn’t hear him. 

‘Of course,’ he thought, ‘she can’t hear me because she has her headphones in. Duh!’ He chastised himself inwardly for his silliness. He remained next to her, standing stupidly. He still needed to get her attention. But how? Once again he felt the heat rising up from Sarah’s thighs. He looked down at them. She filled her chair completely, and it wasn’t a tiny chair, either — it was one of those large, plush, industrially-made office chairs that could go up and down and lean itself way back. And still, Sarah’s ass, hips, and thighs were more than enough to fill it. Jeff’s mouth watered a bit as he looked at her thighs, big, juicy, meaty pillars that strained through her tight white yoga pants. 

He reached out his hand, which trembled a bit, and touched Sarah’s right thigh with his finger. She shifted her upper body as she reached to her left for a paper that was covered in graphs, still typing away with her right hand. Jeff took his finger off her thigh and touched it again, this time actually pressing into her flesh. It felt like he was trying to press into a block of wood that was covered with a thick rubber coating. Her flesh barely gave way. He pressed harder, harder, until he was actually breathing hard from exertion. Still no reaction. He was getting more and more desperate…was she ignoring him? It couldn’t be — she was just so concentrated on her work. Gathering up his courage, Jeff reached out his hand and brought it down on Sarah’s thigh with a desperate slap. 

She turned her head and saw him. Jeff immediately staggered back a few paces, shocked by the sudden full-on view of her face. Her eyebrows went up and she smiled, lifting the headphones up off one of her ears. 

“Oh, hi Jeff!” she said happily, “Did you get some good rest? I know I tired you out there a little bit, huh?” She cracked a wide toothy smile at him. 

“Y-yeah, yeah I got some rest,” he said.

“Good, good!” said Sarah. She sat there looking at him for a few moments, her eyes going up and down his body. Jeff felt suddenly exposed and embarrassed — he was rock hard again. 

“Well,” said Sarah after a few more moments, bringing her hand back up to her headphones, “I’m just doing some work here, Jeff, so…I’m gonna keep doing that, but please, make yourself at home!” She turned to put her headphones back on. Jeff started in horror…was that it?! Was that the only reaction she was going to give him?! 

“Oh,” she said, catching herself, “and you can go into my bedroom and rummage around in the drawers for some clothes or something. I don’t want you to get cold!” She paused, and then she smiled, with a bit of mischief in her eyes. “If you try the bottom left drawer, I think you’ll find some of my old clothes from when I was a teenager — those might fit you.” 

“B-but —” Jeff stuttered, not even appreciating the full humiliation of what she had just told him. He wasn’t ready for their interaction to end. 

Sarah laughed. “I’m just teasing you, Jeff!” She allowed a few more moments to pass as her eyes danced across his nude body. “But seriously, though,” she added, “all jokes aside, those are the only clothes I have that might fit you.” She kept looking him up and down. “Might.” 

Jeff suddenly remembered the satchel his mother had brought him earlier that day. This memory felt like something of a triumph. “But —” he said, with perhaps more energy than he had intended, “—but, my mom dropped off my satchel earlier today. I think it has some of my clothes in it. I can just wear —”

“It doesn’t,” cut in Sarah. 

“What?” 

“She didn’t bring you any clothes. I told her I had clothes that you could wear.”

“B-but,” said Jeff, not understanding, “but she doesn’t…she couldn’t, uh, t-think that y-your clothes, uh…”

“Could fit you?” suggested Sarah, raising her eyebrows in pleasure. “Remember, Jeff, we only spoke on the phone. Your mom doesn’t know —” and here Sarah paused for delicious effect, “—what I look like.” Jeff stood there dumbly. It was incredible. His mom had no idea…no idea that Sarah had become so…..so huge. 

Sarah let a few more moments pass, enjoying them like candy. But she had work to do. 

“Bottom left drawer, ok?” she said, reaching up again to put her headphone back on. 

“B-but!” whined Jeff. He couldn’t bear to be cut off from her. 

“Not now Jeff,” said Sarah kindly, smiling, but with a firmness in her voice, “playtime’s over for now, ok?” She looked sympathetically at his hard cock, and then back at his face, her eyebrows turned up at the inside corners in pity. “We can play some more sometime soon, ok?” 

“B-but,” said Jeff again pathetically, “w-when can we, uh —”

“Soon, ok, Jeff?” said Sarah, the firmness a bit more pronounced in her voice. “I really need to get this work done tonight, ok? You can watch some Netflix on TV or something, all right?” She began to put her headphone back on. “But Jeff — actually, yeah, please put some clothes on. I would really hate for you to catch a cold a few days before your surgery. Let me know if you need anything, ok?” 

“O-ok.” 

She smiled at him warmly and then turned away, putting her headphone back on. And just like that, Jeff was cut off from her. He stood there for a few more moments, pining after her. It took another glance from her and a shooing gesture from her hand that said “go on now, get along!” that made him reluctantly turn himself away. 

He crutched himself toward her room. It took a titanic effort to pull himself out of the fast-deepening quagmire of desperate depression that was beginning to take hold. His feelings, as always, were more complicated than he realized. On the surface he was simply sad that Sarah had turned him away, that she had other things to do besides giving him attention. But beneath his external emotions lurked a rawer and more desperate hopelessness — he knew, somewhere in his brain that he could not regularly access, that he had no power and was helpless to defend himself against Sarah. This fact turned him on, but it also terrified him, and the competing contrasts tugging at the strands of his subconscious made him feel weak and defeated. 

But as always Jeff’s mind retreated into its own fantasies in defense, and it worked.

‘Of course she needs her time!’ he told himself, entering her room, ‘She’s a go-getter — she’s gonna make it in this world.’ He spotted her large chest of drawers to the left, directly under the large mirror it was attached to. ‘And that’s what you gotta do to make it,’ he continued, limping over to he bottom left drawer on his crutches. ‘You gotta work when you’d rather be playing.’ Somehow, Jeff had convinced himself that by putting on some of Sarah’s clothes, he was doing work as well. In truth, it only felt like work to him because he was subconsciously engaged in an internal battle: on one hand, he felt utterly ashamed and humiliated that he was going to be trying on Sarah’s old clothes from when she was a teenager. On the other hand, this very shame and humiliation thrilled him, as did the prospect of seeing how his tiny body fit into clothes that Sarah had long outgrown. As he dropped the crutches and knelt down to open the drawer, his body was tingling with excitement; his fingers and toes felt pricked by pins and needles as the heat of his fast-rushing blood flushed through his face and neck. 

There were three neat stacks of clothes in the drawer. The first looked like shirts, the second was pants, and the third, a little more disorganized, looked like a jumble of socks and…underwear. Jeff’s heart skipped a beat — he couldn’t believe his luck. His trembling hands shot out to the underwear, but then he drew himself back.

‘Wait, wait,’ he told himself, taking deep breaths, ‘be patient Jeff…be patient….start slow.’ His hands drifted over the pants to the shirts. That seemed like a good place to start. He caught his breath and was able to steady himself. This apparent act of self control felt like work enough to make Jeff proud of himself. 

The top shirt was grey and splayed across with blocky blue letters. Jeff threaded this fingers through the neckline…the fabric felt pleasantly cool to the touch. Then he lifted the shirt up. It fell out to its full length in the air as he lifted, and Jeff immediately saw that this shirt was way too big for him. Holding it up face-hight, it dropped down, down, falling nearly all the way to his knees. Had Sarah actually worn this shirt?? Was she just fucking with him. 

As he held the shirt out, Jeff’s eyes were drawn to the blocky blue letters. North Springs High School. His stomach jolted…the same high school he had gone to, so many years before. The letters looked faded, indicating that the shirt had been through many cycles in the wash. He didn’t have to play mind games with himself anymore…he knew that Sarah had worn this shirt, and that it had fit her perfectly. Maybe it had even been tight on her. 

‘It would be just like her,’ Jeff thought, his blood pressure increasing, ‘to wear some casual t-shirt like this to school, skin tight.’ He imagined Sarah in her junior or senior year. How big had she been then? How tall?? All kinds of related thoughts were shooting through Jeff’s head as he found himself almost mechanically reaching the oversized shirt up over his head to try it on. He knew it didn’t fit. But he needed to know…how much it didn’t fit. 

He felt like he was putting on a large blanket. His head emerged through the hole, and Jeff realized that the shirt’s neckline went a good deal down his back, chest, and shoulders. A few more inches either way and the shirt would have been too wide for his shoulders, and simply fallen down his torso and crumpled to his feet. As he suspected, the shirt went way, way down, way past his waist, past his mid-thigh, and all the way to the tops of his knees. Since he was kneeling down, the shirt appeared to cover his entire body, except for the tiny hint of his knees at the bottom. The short sleeves went far down his arms, past his elbows, so that only about two thirds of each forearm was visible on either side. 

Fighting through the pain that shot through his hip, he stood up to look at himself in the mirror. He looked utterly ridiculous…like a young child who was in elementary school and who had raided his older sister’s dresser. The only thing giving Jeff away was his erection poking up, causing the shirt to tent around his crotch. However, aside from his erection, his arms, and the outer reaches of his shoulders, the shirt hardly touched Jeff’s body. It was simply too massive. 

As he stood in front of the mirror, looking at his reflection in disbelief, Jeff felt his eyes wander to Sarah’s dresser. It stood at about the height of his nipples. There were framed pictures propped up in several places, and Jeff felt himself drawn to one of several girls posing together. They were definitely in high school — these girls had already blossomed and were sporting impressive breasts, vigorous hips, and thick legs…they were all casually dressed, making silly poses for the camera. 

But where was Sarah? Almost as soon as he wondered, Jeff saw her. She was in the back, bending down in a pose, her legs spread out wide, her hands on her knees. It looked like the camera had caught her in the act of twerking — Jeff couldn’t help but think back to a little while before, when Sarah had crouched down in the same pose for him and shook her ass in his face. Even crouched down like that, she was still taller than all the other girls in the picture…girls who didn’t look too short themselves. 

Jeff studied the photo, fascinated. Sarah’s blond hair wasn’t as long then as it was now…it only barely reached her shoulders. Her body was evidently incredible, although she looked less curvy than she did now. God her legs looked good in that pose; Jeff wished that he could have gotten a better view of her ass. Surely it wasn’t nearly as big then as it was now. But even still, he saw it poking around on either side of her frame, winking at him mischievously through the past. What about her breasts? Oh yes…yes, they were just about as big as they were now. Good lord, how was anyone who shared a class with her…who taught her…able to concentrate? Even if she wasn’t quite as overpowering as she was now, she wasn’t too far off. 

Jeff wondered when this picture was taken. No explicit indication was given in the photo. Jeff’s eyes wandered back to Sarah’s breasts which were straining through the grey t-shirt that clung to her body. Wait a minute…it couldn’t be. Jeff felt his mouth go dry. Yes, there it was, unmistakably. The blocky blue letters, which were barely legible because of the extent to which Sarah’s body was stretching them…”North Springs High School.” He looked at the shirt in the picture; it couldn’t have fit Sarah any tighter. It looked like her chest was about to burst out of it at any moment. And all the way from her shoulders down her abdomen, the shirt fit skin-tight, like shrink wrap. 

Shifting his focus back to his reflection in the mirror, he couldn’t accept it. There was no way that was the same shirt he was wearing right now. There was just no way…it was a pretty ordinary shirt, after all.

‘I bet Sarah had tons of these,’ Jeff thought to himself quickly, in an unsuccessful attempt to ignore the truth, ‘And this one…this one…was…too big for her.’ The familiar feeling of absolute tininess in comparison with Sarah, of humiliation at this stunning reality, was massaging his insides, making him feel queasy and ill. And yet at the same time, he felt like collapsing onto Sarah’s bedroom floor, on his back, and furiously masturbating. But he couldn’t do that — not with Sarah in the other room. He felt like she would disapprove. Or even worse, she might somehow use it against him. He had to stay in line — he couldn’t give her any more avenues to take advantage of him. 

He quickly pulled the shirt off, tried to fold it, and tossed it onto Sarah’s bed. So Sarah’s later high school shirts were way too big. He would move on to the next one…maybe, just maybe…and here Jeff caught himself thinking: 

‘Maybe there’s something she wore in middle school that’ll fit me.’ He hated this thought, and so he ignored it and knelt back down awkwardly in front of the dresser. There were more shirts in the stack, just as big or almost as big as the first, and Jeff found himself flinging them angrily behind him onto the bed. Had Sarah told his mom that she had some clothes for him because it was all part of her plan? Had she arranged her clothes like this just to humiliate him? The thought was absurd…and yet he was beginning to realize that it foolish to underestimate her. Even as he repressed so much of what had happened in the last 24 hours, he knew that she was capable of far more than he had believed possible before. 

He was down to the last few shirts, which were looking increasingly old and faded. He tried on one of the last ones, an old school band t-shirt that had “Crestview Middle School, 8th Grade Band” splayed across it in tacky tattered letters. Jeff’s heart sank as he felt the shirt drape around him: even this one was too big for him. He looked at himself in the mirror — the shirt looked to be a full size too big. He could’ve worn it around, but he couldn’t bear to. He pulled it off and flung it onto the bed in despair. 

Only one shirt was left. Jeff peered down into the drawer with extreme trepidation. A small, neatly-folded, cornflower-blue shirt stared innocently back up at him. He felt hope rise in his breast as he reached for the shirt. It felt pleasantly soft, even as it was made of fabric so thin that it was partially see-through. He held it out — finally, at the bottom of the pile, something that looked like it could fit him. Jeff put his head through the shirt without difficulty and pulled it down over his tiny torso. It fit him perfectly. He looked at himself in the mirror, almost proud of the fact that something of Sarah’s fit him. 

The first part of his wardrobe completed, Jeff eyed the neat stack of Sarah’s pants in the middle of the drawer. He wasn’t even going to try going through them this time; without even unfolding the jeans and sweatpants on the top, he went straight to the bottom of the pile. But even as he lugged the stacks of her pants onto the bed behind him (they were quite heavy), Jeff felt himself having to resist an urge, in spite of his shame and humiliation, to try on each set of Sarah’s pants. A part of him wanted to go down that thrilling humiliating path again — it was like some sort of sick fascination. How much bigger were high school Sarah’s legs and hips and ass than his? He wanted desperately to know…but something a little stronger still, his pride, stopped him. Maybe it was also because Sarah wasn’t in the room; whenever she was, her mere presence silenced any hint of the pride that held him back now. 

‘How about these?’ he thought, pushing away his unwanted desires and shifting his focus to some light purple skinny jeans that he had found at the bottom of the pile. ‘These look kinda hip, kinda stylish, right?’ He lay down on the floor and pulled them up his legs, and was pleased to find that they also fit him quite well. They didn’t really hug his legs, but they definitely fit him way better than he could have hoped. He looked at himself in the mirror again, and without realizing it he was standing on his tiptoes in joy: he looked pretty good! A quick shift in his right hip, however, brought him back to earth as he winced in pain. He couldn’t forget to use his crutches. How many days was that surgery away? Three or four? He couldn’t remember. 

‘Well, it can’t come soon enough,’ thought Jeff, gritting his teeth through the pain as he stood up again on his crutches. He suddenly realized that his feet were cold, and without bending down, standing on his good leg, he used his right foot to fish through Sarah’s pile of socks and underwear, until he found a couple of socks that looked small enough for his feet. Putting them on, he realized they were still a little big for his feet, but Jeff didn’t care anymore. It was close enough. He looked down into the drawer one last time, and Sarah’s underwear winked back at him. They were the strongest temptation yet, and Jeff actually spent a full two minutes staring down at them, fighting with himself. He badly wanted to try them on, to give into his lust. But he was feeling an injection of confidence, and after a couple minutes he resolved to shut them away. After struggling for a bit with the physical exertion, he was able to maneuver the drawer shut with his foot.

He breathed a sigh of relief, looking at himself in the mirror and giving himself a smile. His eyes naturally drifted back down to the dresser. There were a few framed pictures he hadn’t really looked at yet. He paused a moment, thinking about Sarah in the other room. He hadn’t heard so much as a sound from her. As he stood there listening, he gradually became aware of something…a persistent sound. His ears strained, and he realized that it was the sound of typing. He felt a sudden and enormous sense of safety, and of coziness, and actually closed his eyes as he sighed in pleasure. Sarah was in the other room…she was taking care of him. It was her house; she had everything under control. She was just so…on top of it all. And he could just sit back and relax. 

He browsed the framed photos on the dresser. One of Sarah and her parents at her high school graduation. God she was big…her parents, not small people themselves, were dwarfed by her cap-and-gowned figure. Her dad’s head came up to her chin, and her mom’s reached just below her shoulder. What had Sarah said before? That her dad was a little over six feet? Sarah towered over him in this picture…Jeff didn’t know by how much. But he did realize that she was wearing some impressive heels. Four inches, maybe? He didn’t really know….and though he wasn’t terribly adept at guessing height, Jeff knew that Sarah had grown since this picture was taken. What he didn’t know was that this picture contained all the clues he needed to learn that something else was happening. 

But his eyes moved on. A old picture of people who were probably Sarah’s grandparents. Jeff wandered briefly if they were still alive, and if they were, what they thought of their amazonian granddaughter. Even in the old photograph, they looked like regal people…Sarah certainly had some good genetics. A picture of the beach with the famous black and white lighthouse — Jeff recognized it as one he had gone to many times before. It amazed him how he and Sarah had grown up around the same things…going to the same places on vacation…

And then his eyes alighted on another photograph: a young Sarah in her bike helmet, standing proudly net to her bike. This was the old Sarah Helleger he remembered, the one who was always outside, always active, always riding that little bike of hers. He studied her face carefully…she couldn’t have been older than 11 or 12. This picture must have been taken right around when he was going off to college. He could hardly believe it…there was no hint that this outdoorsy, tomboyish little girl was going to grow into…the Sarah in the other room. Except, well…he checked himself a bit as he looked closer. She was a bit tall for an eleven year-old girl. He couldn’t really see any breasts to speak of…but her arms were rather long and lanky, and a little muscular. And her legs did actually nicely fill out the pants she was wearing…the jeans….the purple….

Jeff realized that he was wearing the same exact clothes that Sarah was wearing in the picture. The same purple jeans…the same cornflower-blue shirt. His vision tunneled, and his organs that breathed air and pumped blood froze. He was the same size…as Sarah Helleger had been…when she was 11. Or 12…whatever…and as he looked at the picture, he could see that her legs filled out the jeans more than his; they were tighter on her thighs, and hugged her hips more. What about her shirt? Her shirt looked about the same as it did on him now…as Jeff’s vision shifted from the picture to himself in the mirror and back again, over and over, he could feel a darkness growing within him. When he looked at his figure in the mirror, he couldn’t see his face…it appeared indistinct, an obscured object, shadowed by chilling sheen. There was lust in his heart. An irresistible and monstrous urge to surrender himself to the awful and humiliating reality that he was so small, so tiny, that a Sarah who would be 17 years younger than him was still bigger. 

His cock was pushing painfully through the purple jeans. In a flurry Jeff unzipped them, jumped back with his good leg onto Sarah’s bed, into the pile of her larger shirts and pants, and began to desperately jack himself off. He didn’t care anymore. He didn’t care if Sarah heard him, or what she would say if she found him like this. He panted out like an animal as he pulled on his big cock, fixating on the photo of the prepubescent Sarah and how her thighs filled out those jeans. He came in less than a minute, actually whining out audibly into the air as he climaxed. Since he had been thoroughly milked so recently by the adult Sarah’s tongue and throat, barely any fluid came out. And almost as soon as he came, Jeff rolled off Sarah’s bed, crawled to the bathroom, and dry heaved into the toilet for over a minute, completely disgusted and ill from giving in to his obscene thoughts. 

After a few minutes, his nausea passed, and as his physiology returned to normal, Jeff once again decided to forget where his mind had gone. He glanced down at the purple pants gathered around his thin thighs and pulled them up, zipping them smartly. Thank god he finally had some clothes to wear…so what if they were Sarah’s from a while ago. They had probably been washed a thousand times and had gotten so worn and stretched out that they were way bigger now than they were then. 

He was more worried about finding out whether or not Sarah had heard him. He crawled to his crutches, stood up on them gingerly, and listened. It was absolutely silent. Jeff couldn’t even hear any typing. He cautiously brought himself to the bedroom entrance and peered around the doorframe into the living room. There she was across the room, still there, hunched over her desk, with her back turned, her blond hair still up messily in a makeshift ponytail. It didn’t look like she had budged from her spot. Jeff looked closer and saw that she still had her headphones on…she hadn’t heard anything. He heaved a sigh of relief in his chest and felt a light sense of joy. All that weirdness that had just happened didn’t mean anything…he didn’t have to explain himself or revisit it ever again. He had really dodged a bullet. 

He limped himself over to the big red sofa -- he wanted to be in the same room with Sarah now. he nestled himself into the cushions, happy as a clam, relishing in every little sound that Sarah made as she shifted her body or typed a sentence or scribbled a few notes. He would look up at her over the sofa head occasionally, but he made sure not to do this too often, since he didn’t want her to catch him looking at her. But after about half an hour, she still hadn’t turned her head, and Jeff began to get antsy. Didn’t she take any breaks? The thought of watching TV was absurd to him…he contented himself with playing around on his phone. He inevitably ended up going to his old conspiracy theory websites, and enjoyed reading one particular article about how the Egyptian pyramids had undoubtedly been built by aliens from another galaxy. But as he read on to other articles about similar topics, Jeff felt himself losing interest. He couldn’t think about anything but Sarah. He daydreamed about when she had started puberty, and what it must have been like for her parents to see her start to grow. How had the boys around her in school reacted? Jeff couldn’t help but smile to himself, imagining high school boys having to deal with a high school Sarah in their classes. 

‘Boy, that must have been a mind-fuck for them,’ he thought, smiling to himself. His smile was a smug one — as he entertained these thoughts, Jeff was imagining himself as Sarah’s partner, as her boyfriend, someone who knew her charms and whims and who could resist them…or at least, someone who could claim them as his own. 

“Jeff!” Sarah’s voice called out merrily into the air, snapping him from his reverie. He struggled a moment to climb out of his comfortable niche in the sofa cushions, and he poked his head up over the sofa head. 

“Y-yes?” he answered. 

Sarah had turned in her chair. She had a pencil in her hand, and her headphones were off her head and hanging around her neck. She smiled warmly at him. 

“Oh! There you are!” she laughed. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to shout. I didn’t see you and thought you were in my bedroom, haha!” 

“Oh! Haha, nope…uh, just right here!” said Jeff. Sarah looked at him for a few more seconds, still smiling. Her bright eyes seemed to be studying him hard. 

“Wellll,” she said, turning back to organize one final stack of papers, “I think I’ve reached a stopping point for tonight.” She shot him a mischievous little look. “Wanna know what I was working on?” 

The way she asked the question made Jeff feel slightly afraid, and he wanted to say “No,” but instead he heard himself saying, “Uh…uh, s-sure.” 

Sarah laughed, shaking out her mane of blond hair as she took out her hair tie. “Surrreee you do,” she said sarcastically. She closed her laptop and turned off her desk lamp. “Well, just suffice it to say: I’ve been studying up on avascular necrosis and the recovery process from surgery.” She stood up from her chair and walked over to the sofa, reaching it in a few strides. Jeff looked up, feeling newly intimidated by her size. She looked down on him softly, smiling. 

“As it happens, I’m actually writing a conference paper on avascular necrosis…specifically the recovery process,” she said. “Ever since I learned about your diagnosis I got interested in it, especially since there’s still lots we don’t know about it.” Jeff looked up at her blankly. Anytime she spoke to him like this, he felt like she was looming over him. It felt like having a conversation with a mountain. 

Sarah reached out and stroked his cheek lightly with a long finger…the same finger that had ravaged his asshole not long before. “Remember, Jeff? I’m studying orthopedics?” 

“Uhhh,” said Jeff, his tingling nerves distracted by her finger, “right. Oh yeah, right! Uh…bones! The study of bones, right?” 

Sarah nodded down at him kindly, continuing to stroke his cheek. “Right, Jeff,” she said softly, “the study of bones, muscles, and joints.” She kept looking at him steadily as she talked. “I guess I should be thanking you— this topic is super interesting, and maybe I’ll even turn my conference paper into a journal article. Who knows?” She smiled at him lovingly. “But of course, Jeff, the really important thing, what I really care about, is that you are ok.” She paused, considering him silently for a moment. “Are you nervous?”

“N-nervous?” asked Jeff. “About…about what?” 

“Your surgery, Jeff,” said Sarah calmly. She had taken her finger off his cheek. 

“Oh. Uhhh…not really, no.” In truth, Jeff had barely thought about his surgery. He couldn’t even remember when it was. 

“That’s good,” said Sarah. “I’ve got you through the whole thing — we’re all gonna take really good care of you and make sure you come out ok.” 

“Th-thanks,” managed Jeff. Sarah’s tone confused him. Should he be nervous? 

Sarah kept smiling down on him. “You’re cute in those clothes, you know that?” He looked up at her eyes, which playfully regarded his. Did she know what he was wearing? Had she planned this whole thing? 

“Ahaha, thanks,” laughed Jeff nervously. 

“I haven’t really gotten a good look at those clothes in….quite some time,” said Sarah exquisitely drawing out her words. 

“Uhh yeah! Well….uh…they fit me,” said Jeff. 

“Yes,” laughed Sarah through affectionately-squinted eyes, cracking her mouth in a wide grin that showed her lovely teeth as she nodded her head up and down, “I can see that.” Her body shook slightly as she chuckled genially down at Jeff, who didn’t know what to do. After a few moments Sarah’s soft laughter died down and she was just looking at him, her head cocked to the side, a slight smile on her face. Jeff felt the pressure grow in his head and around his body as the silent moments passed by, with Sarah just staring at him wordlessly, shamelessly, as the smile disappeared from her face. What was she doing? He bowed his head, once again unable to meet her eyes. He felt like a piece of meat. 

“You know, Jeff,” she said suddenly, her full voice quietly cutting through the silence, “I would really hate it if you grew to despise me.” There was a slight hoarseness to Sarah’s voice that Jeff had not heard before. He looked up at her, and saw that there were big tears in her eyes. He felt the sickly waves of electric jolts jar his insides. This unfamiliar emotional territory frightened him. 

“D-despise you?” he stammered. He shook his head. “H-how — how could I…I despise you?” 

Sarah took a great deep breath and blinked heavily, allowing the tears to drop from her eyes. They landed directly on Jeff’s forehead, splashing his eyes a bit. 

“S-sorry!” said Sarah thickly, through her emotion. 

“N-no, no! It’s ok!” said Jeff, thoroughly alarmed as he wiped off his head. “D-don’t worry about it Sarah!” 

“Thanks,” she said. She folded her hands together in front of her. “I just…” She seemed to be at a loss for words. Jeff’s mind was frantic now, hunting around like a little squirrel, in search of some kind of a way out, some kind of a solution. But he had no idea what was happening. 

“Jeff,” she said seriously, her voice barely quivering with emotion. She seemed to have found her words. “I really need you to tell me if anything that we do…if any of our play…makes you feel bad after we’re done.” Jeff looked at her vacantly, not understanding what she was saying. 

“I mean,” she said, sniffing her nose and wiping her eyes with her hand, “I know when we’re in the heat of the moment, you know, when we’re playing…things can get a little blurred. You know?” Jeff nodded, not understanding anything. 

“And…it’s difficult to know how much is too much, and when to stop, you know?” Jeff nodded again. He felt reassured that Sarah was talking to him, instead of just staring at him with tears in her eyes. He didn’t really know what this was about…maybe she felt stressed out by school? He contented himself with watching her big hands move around as she spoke — they were mesmerizing. 

“I — uh,” said Sarah, getting choked up a bit again. Jeff started to feel scared again — what was wrong with her? “I should have talked to you about this earlier,” said Sarah, “but…well, we’re talking about it now.” He was utterly confused. Talking about what? 

“Listen to me, Jeff,” said Sarah seriously, getting down on her knees so that she was looking Jeff right in the face. “When we’re playing, things get complicated, right?” 

“Uhh…right,” said Jeff. What else was he supposed to say? 

“Now, this is very important.” She took her two hands and brought them up to Jeff’s face, so that her hands were holding his entire head. Jeff felt her fingers snake around the back of his skull and he sighed in pleasure. 

“Stay with me, Jeff. Look at me.” Sarah wasn’t playing around, and Jeff did as he was told. Her sea green eyes bore into his once again, and forbade him to look away. Her tears were gone. 

“Any time we’re playing,” said Sarah carefully and deliberately, “and you want to stop playing, all you need to do is say one word, Jeff. One special word, and I will stop playing immediately.” 

“Uhhh…ok?” said Jeff, unsure of what Sarah was getting at here. Why would he want to stop playing? 

“That word is this, Jeff, and I want you to say it after me: RED.” 

“Red.”

“Good, Jeff. One more time: RED.” 

“Red.” 

“All right.” Sarah looked at him seriously a few seconds more and stood up. “This is all very important, Jeff. You have to understand that we respect each other’s boundaries when we’re playing.” 

“Uhh, right,” said Jeff. 

“And when you don’t like something or aren’t sure of how you feel about something and want it to stop, you don’t need to justify or explain anything to me. All you have to do is say — ” she gestured wordlessly with her hand. 

“—red,” said Jeff. 

Sarah smiled. “Good.” She closed her eyes tightly and opened them as she turned her head up, looking at the ceiling for a moment before she looked back down to Jeff. All traces of her previous emotion seemed to be gone and she seemed content and happy. 

“Well!” she said, smiling at him. “Let’s get ready for bed.”