Reviewer: Pinobr Signed
Date: January 26 2020
Title: Chapter 1: Prologue
First of all I really like your story
World considerations:
1 person out of 200 was immune. Approximately 2 million "BIGS" in the USA 0.6% of the population;This means that approximately 325 million are "Smalls" in the USA 99.4% of the society;
It makes no sense that the "Smalls" who went to live alone have become primitive, at a high likelihood of little ones having all kinds of knowledge and thus adapting to the environment forming a new society, of course millions must have died to the hostile environment but sure they will prevail even more with the abundance of resources and thinking minds would soon be creating factories and their technological advances would be bigger than that of the "BIGS".
Possibly they would become an extremely armed society to make up for their lack size and physical strength eventually becoming a danger to the "BIGS" during these almost 200 years;Just imagine the technological evolution that took place from 1800 to 2000.
Among men 1 in 10 Bigs can become a small;Among women 1 in 20 can become a small;Growers are a extremely rare possibility for a Small to become a Big
Regarding the smalls that stayed with the bigs, I can clearly see this movement to enslave then over the generations.
Character considerations:
Doris - Paul's MomSenator who fights for smalls' rights in this world would be something like "animal rights"How Paul has shrunk affects her:It can compromise her political ambitions by saying that she only fights for the rights of the "Smalls" by having such a child.
Doris' options for preventing reputation loss:
Kill Paul and Katelyn to prevent information leakage
Hide Paul and kill Katelyn for information leak
I understand Doris' actions.
Older sister Sarah 21 years oldShe was tasked by the mother to hide Paul from the world.
Mistake # 1 - If Paul should be hidden from the world in order to avoid problems for Doris then why invest him in Sarah's Model business? (Possibility of information leakage)
Mistake # 2 - Didn't order Barney to keep Paul's origin secret (Possibility of information leakage)
Mistake # 3 - Paul was not ordered to keep his origin secret (Possibility of information leakage)
Mistake # 4 - Because they sold Katelyn - She is a danger to Doris's reputation. // I prefer to believe that they killed her and told Paul that so he wouldn't be so sad.
From the interaction she has had with Paul so far, she appears to be a monster showing herself cold and distant.
Comparisons:
If Paul dies everyone in the family would be devastated
If Paul had Alzheimer and couldn't remember almost anything, the family would be at his side taking care of him
If Paul were to become paralyzed from neck down, the family would try everything to make his lives easier and if it is possible to adapt the house to his special needs.
If Paul shrinks he becomes a problem for everyone in the family and must be treated immediately as a property without any feelings.
Her other sister Brie - Big
He never visited Paul at his sister Sarah's house:
Possibilities:
Sarah does not allow Brie to visit him
Brie has a personality as monstrous as her sister's.
Hannah - Big
Paul is in love with her.
Until the moment without interaction with Paul the "Small"
We don't know if you tried to make contact with Paul's family
It makes sense because Paul is a secret now.
Jen - Big
Seem to like Paul
Until the moment without interaction with Paul the "Small"
We don't know if you tried to make contact with Paul's family
It makes sense because Paul is a secret now.
Katelyn - Small
It was Paul's “companions”
She Loved Paul
We do not know her fate
Unconfirmed facts:
She was sold
She was abducted by Sarah who was amused to see Barney having sex with her.
Barney - Small
Sarah's "companions"
I understand his actions and his willingness to humiliate Paul as much as possible for being a Big that he envies.
Bethany - Small
Her father was Big and he was treated like a pet loved by his family that gave him a better than average life for a Small.
She was Doris' "companions"
Author's Response: Wow that is a lot of thought that you put into that!
In response to the world-building comments: When the Smalls set out to live harsh lives out in the environment, they had to spend pretty much all their time and energy on food, shelter, and basic defense from Bigs and hostile animals. They did not become feral right away; the first Frees born after the Great Shrink were still educated to an extent by their parents/community, but this generation found that education to be meaningless to their lives and by and large did not pass it on to their kids. By about three generations in the Frees were almost all illiterate. Their limited ability to manipulate the world with their tiny bodies combined with their harsh lives doesn't leave much room to develop a technological society even if they had access to the reasources they would need to build one, which they don't. That's not to say they haven't innovated in some ways: The Frees have become experts in breeding certain forms of poisonous plants to use in anti-Big traps, for instance. The Frees have made the wild countryside so dangerous that Bigs won't leave their settlements without specialized equiptment. Gettysburg is an anomaly of urban civilization--most Bigs live in small, poor, isolated communities. Also, it is worth mentioning that without the infastructure of advanced pre-duality civilization, technology has regressed and computers are basically non-existant. Energy is generated through fossil fuels and wood burning (both coal and timber being plentiful in Pennsylvania), and very few people own cars--even Paul's family, which is relatively wealthy by the standards of the day--doesn't own a car. Planes are even rarer and are only used by top government/military officials. The technological level of Big society is roughly the equivelent of mid-20th century America.
