[Report This]Date: March 27 2023 8:18 AM Title: Caught
I agree with the other comments, this is fantastic. The only change I want to see is to slow down a little. For a lot of activities, you say what she does, and that's really it. I would like some more descriptions and time taken to really paint what's happening. Based on the content so far, this story could probably be fleshed out into 5-7 chapters without adding any fluff or filler at all. Can't wait for more!
Author's Response:
Thanks, Frosty. My way of writing is blunt. I try to get to the point quickly. I suppose that's because I write short TV/CD sex stories normally.I don't get much time to write. Probably about 6 hours a week. These 2 chapters were written in 3 hours on a Friday and Sunday evening. When I try to write in a more descriptive mode, I lose interest and then jump back to my "quickie" style again.
I will try to be more descriptive when I write the next part. Now describing the clothing is something I'm at home with.
Date: March 25 2023 7:54 AM Title: Caught
Thank you for the positive comments. I write for fun. If I can I will fix some of those errors. I have a vivid imagination. I just sat down last night and the story just seems to write itself.
I do tend to write "to the point". Often readers of the TV/CD genre want the character dressed and having sex within the first few pages. I can't stay interested in a story to write a novel. The longest story I have written is around 26,000 words.
I have had one story on a site called Literotica read nearly 70,000 times. I wish I had a pound for every read of that one.
I was thinking of introducing some TV/CD elements to the story to add humiliation. Shrinking and enlarging parts of a man's body can almost change his apparent gender.
I'm not sure how that would go down on a giantess site. If you Google Leeanna19 , you may come across some of my other stories. They are chock full of grammatical errors. I am getting better, very slowly.
[Report This]Date: March 25 2023 5:45 AM Title: Caught
Wow! This is awesome! I especially love the ending! Compared to other ways he might have died he seems to be lucky in his current position lol.
It must be hard to sleep in that position. The heat, smell, and pressure must be a lot to handle. I can’t wait to see what happens when they wake up.
Also, good choice on the title. I just had to click this story after reading that.
I can’t wait for the next chapter!
[Report This]Date: March 25 2023 2:24 AM Title: Caught
While its a site bug that caused D W’s review to be doubled, I agree in the points that this is an excellent first GTS story, long way to go to the top but still got the right stuff.
About all I could improve, well, there lots of other ones there, so read them, enjoy, see whats goo snd not, take what you like or as inspiration.
I shall watch your career with great interest.
[Report This]Date: March 25 2023 1:32 AM Title: Caught
I read your notice that you normally write trans and TV fiction, and that this is your first attempt at a Giantess story. With that in mind, allow me to give a short comment, then a more in depth review.
Regardless of being a first, or even a professional story, it is quite good. Well done. The story flows along well, the plot is interesting, and the interactions are nicely scripted and detailed. As a GTS story you have the beginnings of a potentially great story. I hope you keep it going.
That said, you have numerous grammatical errors, though none that take away from your overall story {e.g. "I had heard it in pub from a window cleaner." rather than "I had heard in a pub from a window cleaner."}. You also have some continuity errors {e.g. "I thought I would wait until midnight and break in." followed shortly there after by "The sunlight framed her halo of blond curly hair." Midnight to daybreak in a matter of minutes?}.
A microwave oven heats food by stimulating the water and other molecules inside cells. His brain and overall body would have begun exploding on the cellular level if left in too long. Granted his stay in her microwave seemed to be only seconds and not prolonged. Just something to keep in mind when physics and chemistry are involved. Most of your readers will most likely be aware of such things; especially since many have thought rigorously upon the scientific possibility of size change, so you may not want to introduce subject material that are contrary to your readers intellect.
Those are my only criticisms. I also have to pronounce my admiration for you to write outside of your normal comfort zone. BRAVO!