Reviewer: Stubbornstain Signed [Report This]
Date: May 19 2014 1:43 AM Title: Chapter 14

That was a nice chapter. I did enjoy it but I found some mistakes, only minor ones though:

Here:

The morning pass by quickly as

You mean either:

The morning passes by quickly as

But it could also be:

The mornings pass by quickly as

Here:

Some was laughing, some playing,

You mean:

Some were laughing, some playing,

Here:

“Sounds like you two are having fun?”

This is not a question and so does not require a question mark.

Here:

be harm by regular means

You mean: harmed

Reviewer: chrlorez Signed [Report This]
Date: May 15 2014 7:52 PM Title: Chapter 14

Commander Richards, facing down an angry giantess with nothing but a rifle, a uniform, and the ground he stands. He's officially now my favorite character. Cause honestly, a guy like that deserves major respect. I'm going to be very sad if/when he dies.

This is easily the best chapter in a while because Ryan isn't present. Sure hope Jaden and Commander Richards team up to kick mega-fucker ass! Ryan must die a most gruesome death.