Reviewer: Sovereign Signed [Report This]
Date: November 27 2020 5:00 PM Title: Chapter 3

So far a very good story. I wish the chapters were alittle longer and more descriptive, especially the vore. One of the best ways to approach that is to add more details on the environment and experience ie: "the stomach sloshed him around in the putrid, bubbling bog of mush. Some of the bilee got into his mouth, tasting like rotten, sour food." These kind of details help spice up the story.

 

And personal opinion: i hope he signs the divorce paper. Then you can do a yandere ex wife approch with him, and maybe he finds another woman in the meantime who is gentler, but willing to act out some of his fantasies that I have a feelong hes developing.

 

This would be a gun story development that keeps it dynamic and interesting.