“It’s okay with me as long as you can assure me that Megyn will be the one to eat me,” you tell the barmaid.

“Sure can,” says the woman. She gives you the legal form which you slowly manage to fill out.

“Okay. Ready,” you say, giving back the packet to the woman. She brings you to the shrink booth. Before you know it, you’re two inches tall and being carried into a back room.

The barmaid politely knocks on an office door. There is a brief pause and then a “Come in,” from the other side.

The barmaid pushes the door open and walks in. Megyn, looking beautiful, is sitting behind a desk, on the phone. She has straight blonde hair, blue eyes and high cheekbones. Her face is remarkably beautiful.

“Just set it down on the desk, thanks dear,” says Megyn. “No, not you Edwin, dear. I was talking to one of my employees who was very kind and brought me a snack. Now did you want to talk about the possibility of a parking area near the future site of my new restaurant?”

You’re placed on the desk on a large calendar of the month. You land on a Tuesday. You look up at Megyn, as she watches the barmaid walk out and close the door behind her. You wave.

Megyn sees your wave, arches an eyebrow but otherwise does nothing but listen to the phone pressed to her ear.

“Okay for five thousand? What about three? It’s not like he’s using it,” says Megyn.

She taps a pencil on the calendar with her free hand impatiently. You wonder if she has forgotten you.

“Okay we’ll see what we can get for three. If not then we can meet what he’s asking but no point in not low balling him up front.”

She drops the pencil and suddenly picks you up. She brings you to her mouth, then pauses and says. “That sounds perfect.”

She opens her mouth and tosses you in. “Hey! Wait!” you say. You at least wanted to talk to her a little bit. Unfortunately for you, Megyn has other ideas. She’s used to eating guys like you, and despite your struggles, she swallows you whole.

Epilog:

Megyn enjoys the feeling of the tiny person squirming his way down her throat. She can even feel him faintly in her belly.

“Great, thanks man. I guess I’ll talk to you later.”

“Hey, Megyn. What was that shouting I heard a moment ago?”

“What shouting?”

“It sounded like, ‘Hey, wait.’”

“Oh that was my snack. He was good. You remember the kind of snacks I have here.”

“Uugh, don’t remind me.”

“Haha. If you’re so bothered by the whole idea, then why help me open a new restaurant?”

“It’s about money,” says Edwin.

“And delicious snacks. If you ever change your mind, dear Edwin, I will have a place for you.”

“I never thought I would say this to a woman as pretty as you, but keep it professional.”

“Gladly. I have plenty of other guys willing to throw themselves into my open mouth as it is. Talk to you later Edwin.”

Megyn hung up the phone. She wrote a few notes to herself on the monthly calendar, then allowed herself a moment to enjoy the faint fluttering in her belly before going out to check on the girls in the restaurant.

THE END