“Stop it. You’re almost breaking me!” he called.

“From what we heard, it sounded like you were doing that to your wife,” said Winner Woman, “You are an evil demon possessed monster of a man, who doesn’t deserve to be married. When I think that my late husband is gone, while you live on to terrorize your own family, I could just keep squeezing until I was sure your wife would never have to worry again. But I have another way of making sure. You’re coming with me.”

Then Boy Archer saw what the giantess’s eyes had been too large to notice. Lt Beefecrane had pressed a speed dial sequence on his house telephone, just before the giantess had pulled him out of reach. The telephone had lit up. He had most likely alerted his police station.

“He’ll never hurt you again,” said Robin, “And you’re free to remarry. If this is not infidelity, I don’t know what is. We’re going to take him far from here. He’ll never even be able to act as a policeman again, while being in reality one of the more dangerous criminals of the domestic set.”

Winner Woman placed Boy Archer gently on her shoulder, and walked off clutching Lt Beefecrane, resisting the urge to squeeze the life out of the miserable creature. They had only gone a few blocks, dispersing traffic as she strode, when several police cars approached. One stopped, and a uniformed police captain got out and called up through a megaphone.

“Release that officer, or we will open fire,” said the Captain.

“Your bullets won’t even be large enough to embed themselves in my skin, but I’ll thank you not to tickle me while I’m walking,” said Winner Woman, reaching down and lifting the police car, constable and all in her free hand, “Lt Beefecrane has been battering his wife for months. How you managed to keep someone like him out of prison, let alone working for law enforcement is the worst mystery in this city.”

“You can’t take the law into your own hands,” yelled the constable, who had been driving the car, after winding down his window.

“I only need one hand, and you’ll notice that the law is already in it,” said Winner Woman, “Now unless you want me to lift all your cars and park them on the roof of the nearest skyscraper, you’ll back off and watch me leave with this Devil’s blight on the institution of marriage. What’s it going to be?”

The Captain relented and ordered his men to stand down.

Winner Woman strode out of the city to where Boy Archer had parked the Archer Plane. She put both Beefecrane and Boy Archer on the ground.

“Cover him while I shrink down,” she said.

Boy Archer aimed his arrow at Beefecrane.

“One move and I let this one go,” said Boy Archer.

Winner Woman reduced herself to five foot nine inches tall, unclipped the Purple Hypno Ray Gun from her belt, and fired it at Beefecrane.

“You will now board the Archer Plane, allow us to tie you to the prisoner seat with its straps, and give us no trouble,” she said.

Beefecrane obeyed, while Boy Archer flew the plane to his island. The container had already been prepared. They locked Beefecrane up for the night, and then prepared to make way in the morning. Winner Woman grew to giant size, put Beefecrane in the container and closed it. He could not even see out now. Then she carried the container and Boy Archer out to sea, and then gulped in some air, put Boy Archer in her mouth, and dived down, through the Amazing Zone, and up into the shores of Brobdingnag. They took their captive to Queen Hyper-lighter, who locked him in a dark drawer for a while.

Two days later, several citizens of Brobdingnag went to visit the Brobdingnag museum, and were given a tour by the guide.

“… And here is our newest exhibit: the first ‘wife basher’ in captivity. This is a rare and diseased breed of little folk, whose mating habits include violent assault of the loved one. This was one custom of the little land that our Queen could not allow to continue. So she sent Diana to their world to hunt down, capture and bring back the first of what will be a growing exhibit of wife bashers. Feel free to reach down into the cages and knock them a little with your fingers as part of their sensitivity retraining process. It lets them know a sample of what they’ve been inflicting on their wives. When we have enough to fill the exhibit, we will farm some of them out to be hunted down and tamed for sport, but not released back into their own society until a way can be found to remove their demons once and for all.”

(The citizens of Brobdingnag were unaware that the only way to do this was to call on the name of Jesus Christ.)

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